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What did you tell the police? Last week I was pulled over for speeding taking my sister to the airport. (we slept late and her flight left at 5 a.m.). A cop pulled me over less than a mile from the airport. He asked me "are you aware you were doing 52 in a 35...I said "yep, trying not to miss a flight". I handed him my license, insurance and registration when he got to my window. He said "ok, slow it down, I won't keep...

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Is the new AB format really what the long time members wanted? This new format SUCKS....I probably won't be back very often, if at all.

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Do cowboys eat Sushi? Yes if that's a nickname for cowgirls

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If you could have at work, a dispenser that doles out free "anything" (other than money) what would you want it to dispense? COMMON SENSE! Apparently there's a huge lack of that these days. And a simple "please" and "thank you" would help also!

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I farted and now there's a hole in my underwear. What should I do to prevent this from happening again? Try Kevlar underwear...If you put a hole in those, you have serious issues...lol

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If you could choose one person on earth, to get stuck on a deserted island with (for the rest of your life) who would you choose? Well, since it's for the rest of MY life, I'd want my kids to still go to college, so not them. Also, I'd want them to have a parent available, so not my ex. I would choose a convicted pedophile, so I could kill them, as I'll be stuck on the island for the rest of my life, I wouldn't suffer any repurcussions, and they wouldn't be able to molest any more children.

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The duct-tape is hindering my breathing, and this rope is burning my wrists, what should I do? Muffle "I'm sorry mom, I won't talk back to you again, ever", and I'll let you go. Oh wait that's my daughter I was thinking of...

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Have you ever capsized a boat? If a canoe counts then yes! And boy was my boyfriend, who was anti-cussing, surprised to hear me when we hit a bush full of spiders and found out all the words I knew...lol.

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Do you carry a bag of stuff with you everywhere you go? No...I carry my keys, cell, driver's license and debit card...always in my pockets. And no I'm not a lesbian, but carting around a purse all the time is just a pain in a**.

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How would you customize your casket if money was no object? I don't want a casket...but I have picked out a nice water-soluble urn, as I wish to be cremated, and have my kids take a nice cruise together and toss me out to sea. I lived in West Palm Beach, FL for years, and always found it very calming just to go sit and watch the ocean. I'd rather my kids spent thousands on a nice cruise they may get some enjoyment from than spend thousands...

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What do you consume while out, but won't buy for yourself at home? For me its Root Beer. Egg rolls/spring rolls...they're just not the same at home

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Grocery shopping. Do you turn it into a fun adventure, or is it an awful chore that you don't like? I like to go late at night, and without my kids. You have to deal with the stock boys, but no crowds and no kids with me...bonus!

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If aliens landed their space craft on your front lawn, what would you say to them? If you're here to take someone back with you, here are the GPS coordinates of my ex's house

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If you entered a contest and won a Log Home, in the country, would you live in it or sell it? LIVE IN IT!! And pray like he** that it was in Tennessee

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Do robots dream of bunnies? Do they go to sleep by counting RAMs jumping fences?

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I answered a question with a very non-controversial and conversational answer, yet someone downrated me five points - why would s/he do this? So did I, but the person who DR'd me also left a comment and their user name is "slayer". I checked out his questions and answers and I guess there's a reason why after a year, he's still a level 3. I guess some people don't agree with "agreeing to disagree"?

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Do you have a favorite music video spoof? This is one of Pearl Jam's Even Flow: I love Nickelback, but this was too funny. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=co_tA7y4L48

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How do you feel about the Sci Fi Channel changing its name to Syfy and the new ads they are running to promote it? (link provided) I think it's pandering to the hooked-on-phonics crowd and the dumbing down of America.

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Can you name something that's majestic? Two: 1) the ocean, I always found it calming to just go sit at the beach to chill out and think about things (or not think about things), and 2) sunrise in the mountains of Tennessee...very beautiful.

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If you pull my hair...will it grow faster? If I pull your hair, yes "it" will grow faster, but "it" won't be your hair...lol

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My mom has been given about 2 years to live. My dad & her divorced over 30 yrs ago and he's still giving her sh**. Her funeral arrangements are made. I plan on banning him from funeral as he beat her for years. Do you think this is right thing to do? To add more, my dad is/was extremely abusive to my mom and me, and much less so to my younger sisters. I don't speak to him, and my mom only tolerates his calls when he calls to speak to one of my sisters. He hospitalized her more than once because of his beatings and she ended up shooting him when I was 10 (over 30 years ago). I detest him. He drinks daily, uses crack, LSD, marijuana,...

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Your little sister just got beat up by her boyfriend.....what would you do? I'd call my cousin "Little Eddie". He's 6'4", weighs about 280 and has a black belt. We'd pay the boyfriend a visit.

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Why do I get friend requests from people who never answer my questions or leave any comments anywhere? who are you people??? why do this? This answer will definitely show my cynical & skeptical viewpoint...but I believe some people seek out AB friends who have high rankings, perhaps thinking they'll be able to get a lot of points from that person's responses. I prefer to find people whose questions/answers I find consistently funny or relevant.

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If I was to give you something "Sweet" what would you want it to be? Buy me a blank card, but write your own heartfelt sentiments inside, not the sappy pre-printed stuff. Buy me a single yellow rose (my favorite)...I don't need a $50 bouquet to get the same sentiment across, make me a great meal, arrange for the kids to be elsewhere for the evening....stuff along those lines. I don't need expensive dinners out, expensive jewelry or anything like...

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I just sold something on eBay & I have a reminder that states that the item sold is eligible for a second chance offer. What does that mean? E-bay 2nd chance is used when: 1) the item's reserved priced isn't met, 2) you have more than 1 of the same item for sale, or 3) the winning bidder didn't pay. See e-bay's terms at: http://pages.ebay.com/help/sell/second_chance_offer.html

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How would I know if my girlfriend was really a psycho ? What signs should I look for ? ( humor expected) Does she ask to tie you up...when she's not wearing lingerie? Does she ask for a lock of your hair and has lots of push pins and voodoo books? Does she randomly call and mention where you are without you telling her, because she's installed a GPS device on your scooter? Did she get your name tattooed on her after your 1st date?

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If you were allowed to hang a banner from the Empire State Building for a day, what would you write on it? "Say 'Hi' to a stranger"

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What's one thing you'd never hear God say? Jerry Springer...I love your show.

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What fun things can you do with a Dish Network satellite dish, you no longer have service for? I imagine a stoner could use it for Fruity Pebbles or Banana Splits

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How's that Interner Explorer update working out for you? Oh...IE has an update? Ooohhh, hold on let me get right on that, right after I pull my fingernails out with pliers. I quit using that piece of crap years ago and don't expect to return to it any time soon. It totally irks me when I hit a website that says I have to have it, rather than Firefox.

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If you are seeing a smaller man and you want him to buy snug fit condoms because regular ones slip off, how can you get past the power of the ego and nicely convince him to say yes? YOU buy the appropriate ones, and when the times comes that you need one (so to speak), then you say "no, let me get that for you" and you put it on him from your personal stash.

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Sometimes/often my ex wife, she speaks to me through my child, I feel that is wrong, is it? It is immature and selfish for an adult to put their child/children in the middle of adult business, or to alienate a child against their other parent. If you feel that your ex is participating in Parental Alienation, that's a reason to take them to court and gain custody. Maybe if you mention that to her, she'll stop harming the innocent child in the equation. Tell her that she...

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My sons mother told the judge she makes $80 every 2 weeks in court over child support. I know she makes well over $400 a week. I had my lawyer subpoena her pay stubs and now she is calling me scum for trying to pay her less? who is really wrong? You need to have her & your pay stubs and tax returns submitted to the court. No, you are not wrong and not scum for getting the legal amount set. Legally you are right. Morally, you owe your child a decent upbringing. You don't have to over-pay her in child support to provide for your child. You can still buy your child's clothing, pay the medical bills, whatever, without...

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What does it mean to have character? To me, it means doing the right thing, even when no one is looking or would know otherwise.

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Remember that girl who claimed she dozed off while getting three stars tattooed on her face and woke up with the Milky Way plastered all over her ? Did you believe her ? Turns out she was lying. I WISH I could sleep through getting a tattoo...I have three so far, and two of them just felt like bee stings, the other one though, it was all I could do just to sit still. Anyone who says they've slept through a tattoo is obviously lying. I have fell asleep in the dentist's chair though...lol

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What don't you like about the beach? Sand...in crevices where it shouldn't be, then in the carpet of my car.

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Parents pressure and Demand grandchildren. I'm 30 & single. What to do? Sit down with them and have a serious talk. Tell them that you'll have kids IF & WHEN you decide to, and not until. Tell them that if you were to have a child just to satisfy their needs, that you may not be the parent you should, because you won't be ready ...and they certainly wouldn't want less than the best parent for their beloved grandchild now would they?

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What is the most inappropriate place you have ever had sex? In a hospital bed...

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What's your favorite song? Nickelback: If Today Was Your Last Day

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What do you always take with you when you leave your home? Driver's License (ID) & Debit card. I keep a spare key hidden outside my house, so if I leave without those I'm ok. And, unlike some people...I won't ABSOLUTELY die without my cell.

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I desperately need help. My ex is smothering me. I was very clear when I told him we were over but he still calls me constantly, calls me pet names, and is basically planning our future together. How can I tell him to leave me alone without hurting him? If you believe you were very clear...apprarently he doesn't think so. Be Very More Clear...Say Look, we aren't seeing each other anymore, I don't wish to see you anymore (for the following reasons...), don't call me, don't call me pet names, don't call me, don't call me pet names, don't call me (yes I meant to repeat myself, as you should). Change your...

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Just exactly what does it take to get 18,000 people to pose nude together at the same time for a photo? 1 Pam Anderson, and 17,999 guys wishing they were like Tommy Lee?

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Are you thankful for everything you have? Usually, but sometimes I forget, then I watch the evening news, and I remember, I DO have two healthy kids, a decent house, a car that runs, and my bills are paid, and I am mostly grateful for the two healthy kids.

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Oh, my Lord, one of my best friends named Carpediem COAT ab imo pectore, passed away and I barely found out about it. I am visibly shaken over this. Would you please say a prayer for her and her loved ones? I will deeply miss my dear friend on AB. I am so sorry for your loss. "ab imo pectore" translated from latin means "from the bottom of my heart". Today, my best friend's mother passed away. I've known her for 30 years, so I feel your pain.

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What is your mother's middle name? My mom doesn't have a middle name.

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In what applications have you used steel wool? I used to use it to clean my stainless steel sinks. I also would see bits of it in my dad's carpet and youngest sister's carpeting. Then, I found out it's used to pack crack pipes. I'll bet you can guess why I don't see or speak to them.

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If you had a tape worm, what would you name it? Captain Hook...because that's how they attach to your innards.

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For the past 11 years, I've lost a friend or family member near or on another friend/family member's birthday. Is this just coincidence? See my answer. March 25, 1998 --- My mom's mom, Grandma Pearl died (2 days before my ex's b-day) March 9, 1999 --- My ex's aunt Norma died (18 days before my ex's b-day) June 7, 2000 --- My ex's dad died (on my Grandma Myrtle's b-day) January 5, 2002 --- my Grandma Myrtle died (5 days before my daughter's b-day) June 12, 2002 --- my friend Lynn B. died (on my b-day) ...

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If you have plans to be cremated, what do you wish to be done with your ashes? I'd like my kids to take a cruise, somewhere in the Atlantic, and put my ashes out to sea. I lived for several years in FL and always thought it very calming to just go sit and watch the ocean. I've already picked out my urn. http://www.perfectmemorials.com/aqua-journey-earthurn-cremation-urn-biodegradable-p-1353.html

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What was the last thing you finished? I just finished icing my cake for my cake decorating class tomorrow.

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Have you ever been to a cabin? YES! My favorite thing to do for a vacation is to rent one in Tennessee. The last time I did this we rented one from Laurel Fork Rustic Retreat. It was beautiful, isolated, no phone. We've also rented in Gatlinburg, TN which was also beautiful!

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Now that it's over...was it worth it? Yes, but only because I got a beautiful son out of it. Otherwise, not for a million dollars.

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What do you make 'look easy'? I would say sudoku, but people who know me might say "being a b**ch"

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What comes to mind when i say "Florida"? Heat that feels like your skin will melt off some days, palmetto bugs, geriatric drivers, St. Augustine, my favorite place in FL, and expensive to live there. I lived in West Palm Beach for 6 years.

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What happened in your life that made you realize you were becoming an adult? Aside from when I was 12/13 and discovered I was growing pubes and tried to pull them out, I'd have to say when I was 18 and signed the lease on my apartment.

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Top 5 reasons "KUNG FU's" David Carradine would hang himself? David misunderstood what the movie was about. The movie he was in Thailand to film was named Stretch. There was a rope tied around his...well, you know.

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Name 3 Things Men Do Which Forces Girls to Reject Them? 1) Lie 2) Act needy/insecure and wanna be around you too much too soon 3) Talk too much about their exes 4) Be jealous of your guy friends 5) Talk too much about themselves oops, lost count there

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You open your door. There's 2 police officers standing there. What is your first thought? It's my birthday and my best friends really love me and got me 2 male strippers?

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Can you name two things that just belong together? My ex, covered in honey, and a hill of fire ants

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What does your food pantry say about you? Mine says the same thing my recycling bin does: "you eat out too much"

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What's the point of putting clothes on crash test dummies? I have no idea...but can you imagine putting that under "Occupation" on a credit application?

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Would you watch Octomom's new reality television program? I'd rather submit to water torture or having my toenails pulled out with pliers. She's a complete and utter moron, and her dr. should be shot for helping to produce 8 children which would be raised by someone without the means or intelligence to do so.

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Dads, Has your little girl put make up on you, or painted your toenails yet? I will answer for my ex...Yes, 2 years ago when she was 13 they went to a concert together and he let her put black eyeliner on him and even get pics taken.

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Fish out of water: For laughs, what character would you like to take out of one show and drop into another? (I would like to drop Larry the Cable Guy into Leave it to Beaver) I'd put Laverne & Shirley into The View...maybe then I'd watch it

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What are the laws about what to do with one after they die? Do you have to be embalmed either for burial or cremation? Can you just be put in hole in the ground if that's what you want? Embalming is NOT required, either for regular burial, or for cremation. My ex's parents both requested cremation, so he didn't bother with the extra expense of embalming. See: http://www.funeralplanning101.com/burial-interment/embalming.aspx

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Is your next door neighbor an idiot? No. Bob is AWESOME! He's 85, loves to snow-blow for all his neighbors in the winter, has the best lawn in the summer. He and his wife still travel to Hawaii and Vegas. And he's an original owner, so when I need to know when something was last done on my house, he can usually tell me...lol.

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In the US, have they banned logic and rational thinking in the big white buildings where all the people dress up to argue? (humor welcome) "I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter....

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For laughs, would you take any lyric, quote or title and replace one word with "squirrel(s)" and share the result with us? How about some song titles? Aerosmith: Squirrels in the Attic The Animals: The House of the Rising Squirrel Deep Purple: Squirrels on the Water Duran Duran: Hungry Like The Squirrel The Four Tops: Baby I Need Your Squirrel The Lovin' Spoonful: Do You Believe in Squirrels Pink Floyd: Another Squirrel in the Wall The Rolling Stones: I Can't Get No Squirrel Well,...

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Have you ever been bitten by a seal? Nope, but if I ever do, I hope it's a Navy seal.

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HEADLINE READS: "Woman gives birth to twins, fathered by two different men"....what are your thoughts & opinions on this? My thoughts? 1) Whore 2) Yes, it's possible 3) Birth control? Because if you're making such poor choices, chances of you being a good parent are slim. And, after reading the story at http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30864533/ I found out the mother is 20, her boyfriend is 44, she has a 4 year old by a different man, and is now pregnant again. I vote she gets mandatorily...

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If you could have your own crew of Seven Dwarfs, ala Snow White, what would your seven be named? Wealthy Handy Brainy Chef Chauffeur Bodyguard Won Hung Lo

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What is a ending of a word that rhymes with "ME"? (Mine are Fantasy, Glee, Absentee) Orgy

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Do you prefer dating a stupid hot guy/girl or an intelligent below average guy/girl? Dated a HOT stupid guy ONCE...I felt more stupid just being with him. I'd much rather be able to have a decent conversation with someone, than just sit and adore his looks. Besides, you can change your looks, but you can't fix stupid.

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Who's the wizard behind the curtain!? Not sure, but at this point I'm about to introduce him to my Glock!

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Where's the on-ramp to the road of happiness? I Dunno....I took the road where the sign said "detour" and all I've gotten since is roads with potholes and "under construction"

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When's the last time you really had your ass whipped at something? Playing Euchre on pogo...I love it, but apparently suck at it.

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If you don't happen to like me________(complete this) tough sh** sucks to be you and I couldn't care less

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Do you hang out with people who gossip or do you avoid them because if they gossip about others chances are they will gossip about you? I try to avoid them, but you can't avoid everyone you work with. So I just watch what I say. Unless someone in particular at work is cheesing me off by something they are doing (or not doing), then I'll tell the gossip chick, trusting she'll run her mouth.

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My family surname ends with me, should I have tried harder to have a boy to carry on the family name - or just let it be? My ex's parents had a cow when we shortened his last name by 3 letters when we got married..."how could you do this to us" kinda stuff. I don't see the label/last name being nearly as important as what have you contributed to the gene pool? Decent, honest, moral, intelligent young people who will grow up to be contributing members of society....or the unfortunate...

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Does the thought of your parents having sex kinda freak you out? More like grosses me out...my dad is 65 and I've heard his new girlfriend is 45. I guess that's better than when I was 13, my dad was 37 and his girlfriend was 17.

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If you could tell any one of your body organs something what would it be? Dear Organs, I apologize for my years of use and abuse. Yes, the rumor is true, my gallbladder did get pissed off and moved out last year, but I hope the rest of you will stick with me. I'm not promising to behave any better in the future though. But if you could all stick with me another 20 to 30 years, that'd be great.

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I don't feel like working today. So can I trust you to be good and not do anything bad? lol...You know, where I live there's about 1 cop for every 40 people, versus 1 for every 590 people in LA. They're hiring cops in a little town about 2 miles north of here for $50,000 and change to start. For $79,000, you can purchase a 3 bedroom/2 bath home with 1500 sq. ft. And the bonus is no gangs, no riots, no earthquakes, no forest wildfires....then again, you might be bored...

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I have a three year old dell laptop, it says i am using almost 100 percent of my pc usage, even right after i boot up, what can be wrong, also neo pets and pogo games wont load anymore, can anyone help me, do i need to reformat?% I had the problem of pogo and neopets games not loading after I updated my Java to the newest edition. I uninstalled java, AND all previous versions of it that were on my computer, loaded an older version on, and now my games work again. Don't know what the problem is with the latest version, but it isn't compatible with the online javascript games on those sites.

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What archaic laws that you know of that should be stricken from the law books? For a few good laughs, see the following: http://www.bertc.com/subfour/truth/sexlaws.htm

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What's the difference between Men and Pigs? You can hire someone to kill your pig, but not your man...well, you can, but there might be consequences.

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Has Firefox ever "crashed" on you? Yep...whenever I've surfed too much, I have to close it, delete my cache, etc. then re-open. Still better than IE, which is s l o w as dog**it

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Which would be your choice, Glock or Beretta? Mine is a Glock model 19...have never owned a Beretta so I can't compare the two.

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I just had an apple pie from McDonalds. It had a sticker on it that said use by 12/20/06 at 12:24 pm. How do they know the exact time it needs to be used by? And what will happen if you eat it after that time? The exact time it is supposed to be used by for a pie from McD's is 4 hours after it was baked. If your time was 12:24, presumably, it came out of the oven at 8:24 a.m.

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What's worse, not being able to see or hear? I would hate not being able to see my kids as they grow up, but sometimes, it wouldn't be the worst thing if I didn't have to hear them...

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Would you take a job as Satans little helper in the Afterlife? No, because I was married to him, and I'll be damned (pun intended) if I'll be his "little helper" in the afterlife...

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What first comes into your head when i say Bedroom? Lately? Boredroom

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What first comes into your head when i say Bedroom? Lately? Boredroom

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Is your place of employment slow right now? No, but several of my co-workers are.

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Why do babies cry? They've realized it's all uphill from here.

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Who in your opinion is a Lady? Barbara Walters

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What is the most random thing you can tell me right now? "They" said a black man would be president when pigs fly...and the World Health Organization has raised the alert to Swine Flu to a level 5/Pandemic Alert. Just a joke I heard today....please don't flame me.

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If you had the wherewithall what would you buy your 3 best friends? I would build Soph a bigger house, I would buy Steph some time off work (weeks or months) as she has everything but works way too much, and I would pay all my mom's bills so she could retire.

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Do you still think of your very first love? Yes...and I haven't met a guy since who holds a candle to him.

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Let's build a tree house in the old shade tree near the AB Drive-In! It doesn't matter that we are "grown ups." What should it look like? What will we put into it? (just a little working music below) Treehouses are awesome...for both adults and kids. Being all grown-up and old now, I'd like something like this. http://www.cedarcreektreehouse.com/TH_photo.htm

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If you painted yourself into a corner, what color paint would you have used? Red...to match the color of the flames of the bridges I've burned

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What makes your pee-pee tingle? Well, if I had one, I would say a Saleen S7

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5 year old child had an "Accident" at school, teacher bagged up the poop and sent it home in the kids backpack with a note, how many ways would you lose your mind on that teacher? That is sick and immature as he**...My response would probably be equally so, resulting in my being charged with Assault with Feces on the teacher.

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When you're s/o is in the shower, do you make it a point to swing by and get a little "peek"? I like to offer back scrubs...

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How much of a dumbass do you have to be, to accidently shoot yourself in the head with a spear gun? One that should succumb to the "natural selection" process. And we can only hope he hasn't "contributed" to the gene pool.

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Do you covet your neighbor's ass? No...he's about 85...but I do covet his lawn...not a dandelion to be found.

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During these hard economic times,& trying to make ends meet, I may have to pimp out my PET RATS. What kind of jobs are they eligible for? Party favors for Richard Simmons? Sorry...that was so wrong...

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Is it wrong to date multiple guys.Specifically two guys, two first dates on consecutive days? No...they are 1st dates, there's no commitment, it's just a date. Of course, if it goes on for a while, you should discuss whether there are any expectations of either person about dating other people.

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In your opinion, what is a great break-up song? Time For Me To Fly by REO Speedwagon. I actually know someone who back in the '80 queued up his cassette to that song, and when he dropped her at home, put the song on to play for her (he found out she'd been cheating).

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Is it true...with enough make-up and lighting, they can make just about ANYONE...look good? Yes! I'm not gay but have friends who are, so I've seen a couple of drag shows...those guys could teach quite a few women I've met some valuable lessons...of course what you take home may not be what you wake up next to...

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If you build it, they will come...but what will they bring? Baggage...and probably more than you need...lol

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The skin on my face especially around my mouth seems to flare up every week,not spots just red itchy and sore.it usually fades within 3 to 4 days and i am left looking like i am peeling from a sunburn.what causes this?help! I'd suggest checking with a dermatologist...it could be eczema or psoriasis. There's no "cure" but you can use a topical ointment like 1% hydrocortisone which may help. See: http://www.psoriasis.org/about/psoriasis/sites/eyes.php#mouth Also see: http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_body/skin_stuff/eczema.html

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MY SON IS SUPPOSED TO GRADUATE HS IN MAY OF 09. HIS GRADES ARE BAD AND I AM NOT SURE HE WILL GRADUATE. HE TURNS 18 ON AUG 1, 09. WILL I BE ABLE TO STOP PAYING CS WHEN HE TURNS 18 EVEN IF HE HAS TO REDO HIS SENIOR YR. OUR DIVORCE WAS IN KY BU You'll have to check your local/state laws, but generally the rule is when the child reaches 18 AND has graduated, OR when the child turns 19. So, if your child hasn't graduated at 18, and is still in school, you are still paying. I'll look further into KY laws, but I'm betting it's the same as in Ohio (and lots of other states).

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What name do you give to a pet octopus? Call it Calamari...and yes I know the difference, but it's still funny.

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Why do women feel compelled to have children? Not all do. When I was 20 I was a legal secretary. The other legal secretary in the department was 30, and had been happily married for 10 years. She and her husband had decided on no kids prior to their marriage. She told me that she had to see SEVEN different doctors before finding one that would agree to tie her tubes, after she underwent "counseling". She told me that she...

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My teacher at school is a hompohobe. He teachs in our 11th grade class that homosexuality is a mental disorder and can be cured. He also teaches that gays spread illness and damage moral values. I am gay so it offends me. How do I stop this? The teacher is obviously an ignorant bigot. 1) If you are out to your parent(s), go to them about the issue. If you are NOT out to your parents, and go to the school administration about the issue, the school has NO right to out you to your parents and are violating your right to privacy. 2) Go to the school administration about the issue. If he is doing this in front of the entire...

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What would be a good comeback after someone says your gay Yeah, it's juvenile, but if it were me, I'd probably come back with something like "well, your dad didn't have any complaints last night".

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Hypothetical here. Married couple (man and woman), woman is bisexual, both husband and wife are completely ok with the wife getting/having a girlfriend. Your thoughts? I have 2 thoughts: 1) what you do in your marriage is none of my business (as long as no children are adversely affected), and 2) I believe marriage, whether it's hetero or same-sex is a declaration of monogamy to the person you love. If you don't want to be monogamous to each other, why be married, and not just shack up?

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If you saw someone being publicly harassed for being homosexual would you stand up for and or defend them? Most definitely, whether it was because they were homosexual, of a different ethnicity, disabled, whatever. Because someone is different than someone else doesn't give anyone the right to sh** on someone else (or their rights). There is WAY too much ignorance and way too much intolerance today, and the more people quietly put up with it, the longer it will persist.

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A friend i've had since pre-k, who is like a brother to me, recently started making sexual comments to me and he texts me in the mornings telling me how he hates morning wood and asks me what i do while my bf is gone to work. What should I do? Not responding is one way. Telling him what you think is even better. Tell him you think of him like a brother, that his texts and comments make you feel uncomfortable, that if he had any respect for you and your current relationship he wouldn't make such comments. Maybe you could try it first in a nonchalant way, but if that doesn't work, state it outright. If he continues to do...

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Men or women: which gender has more obese people? Given statistics I found, females tend to be obese more than males. See: http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/42134.php

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Who else thinks the birth of the octuplets is obscene? Obscene, selfish, irresponsible, selfish, short-sighted, selfish, ignorant, selfish, narcissistic, unrealistic, oh and did I mention selfish and totally disregarding the welfare of her 6 living children? SOMEONE is helping her, and I believe there is more to this story that isn't being told. How does someone who hasn't worked in 9 years afford in-vitro, multiple times over? That...

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Does anybody know any good "Yo momma so fat" jokes? even her shadow has stretch marks

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Different things scare different people. If any, what type of horror film scares you the most? The least? I've watched horror flicks since I was 13...have seen about all of them...and can eat a plate of spaghetti while watching them. They're kinda funny in their repetitiveness, and that fact that there's almost always a topless girl, and someone running away who trips. But nothing scares me more than watching the news. Recently, in my area, a mother named China Arnold was...

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I live in ohio and have paid child support for 15 years. But there was never a court order for an amount. i just paid 200 or so. so will i be made to pay that back because there was no court order. In Ohio, any amounts given to your child's other parent, not paid through the Child Support Enforcement Agency, are considered a gift. My ex paid support to me via checks sent through his attorney prior to our actual divorce. Once the divorce took effect, the court said he was delinquent in child support payments because he hadn't been paying through them. He had to get his...

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What do I have to do to get you to sleep with me? Pass a National Agency Check (NAC), pass a complete psychological testing, pass a thorough physical, provide a resume, college transcripts, fingerprints, a blood sample, provide a copy of your credit report, and references (at least 10, both personal and professional). And that's just for sleeping...anything further than sleeping will require further investigation and documentation, and...

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Have you ever received a lap dance? Yes, and I still can't figure out for the life of me why my then-boyfriend thought I would enjoy it, or why I even went there with him. Oh wait, I remember...I later found out he was seeing the "dancer" on the side while he was seeing me, and he got some odd kick out of the whole experience. Thank god I'm not 20 and naive anymore.

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How do you deal when the person you have been for more then 9 years spits in your face after an argument? Personally, I think that is disgusting. My sister did that to me during an argument and had she not hid behind my mother (literally) after she did it, I would have ripped her head off her shoulders. I still tried, but didn't want to hurt my mom in the process. I don't care how peeved you are at someone, there is NO excuse for that type of behavior and you should not take it for...

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Who is the sexiest woman in the world? My vote goes to Halle Berry...IMO she is drop-dead gorgeous

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My daughter has lived on her own for several years (she's 23) She married & is moving to TX with her husband in the Air Force. I am so sad. It's 14 hrs from Ohio to Tx. I feel unable to cope with that distance. Suggestions for how to stay close? Webcams are really very cheap now, and often sold in sets of two. I know it won't replace being able to actually see your daughter or have her near, but I think it'll be the best thing you can use to see and hear her at the same time (versus phone/e-mail).

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Do you ever just want to lock your kids in the basement and let them fight to the death? My two seem to want to do most of their arguing in the car. This works out well for me as they both totally hate country music (which I like). So, when they won't shut up, I just crank the stereo to a country station and within a minute, they are both silent. Works every time.

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Which name is the most synonymous with the term "Bimbo", Bambi or Bubbles? Are those the code names for Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian? If so, I'd say it's a toss-up.

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Just you wait till your father get's home, he's gonna ______________________! he's gonna say "I warned you not to piss your mother off, so don't cry to me about the a** whippin' she gave you"

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A lot of people call me _______?(fill in the blank ) Jane...and you can call me too...my number is 555-1212

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Should "Superstitions" be a sub category of "Folklore"? I think superstitions are totally different than folklore. My grandma was really superstitious, and heaven forbid you open an umbrella inside her house, because she'd have a fit. But my older 1/2 sister told me the story of the Bell Witch, which is folklore. You can see my Tennessee heritage. Superstitions are beliefs people have about whether or not something will bring...

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What fuels your compassion? Young children, really old people, and people with an IQ which doesn't allow them to function without help. Because often it seems, these are the people who are hurt/used/abused by others, and that infuriates me and makes me want to seriously hurt their abusers.

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How often has the light at the end of the tunnel been a locomotive running your ass over? TOO often...but I did find a coffee mug that I just had to buy which says "Due to budget cuts, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off", which also sums it up for me...lol

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Is YOUR car a cop magnet?...in other words, does your car attract more cops than a donut shop? No way...I have a gray/silver Impala and there seems to be a couple million of them...everywhere I go I see one. But... I did get a speeding ticket in November, 2008 in this tiny dot on the map. Google the following: North Hampton Ohio speed trap See how many hits you get. The 'town' has a population of less than 400, but somehow they generate almost $150,000 per year in...

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DO you believe it's true that a child with gay parents are more likely to turn out gay? No, because I believe a true gay person is born that way. I say that because I do believe there are a rare few who choose it, but that a true gay person was that way from birth. My sister is a lesbian. I remember one christmas when she was about 6 and was given a doll for christmas and cried about it. She is 35 and still has her Matchbox collection. So, to your question, I think the best...

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I just found hickey on my 14 yr old daughter. Any advice? Take your daughter to her pediatrician...have her put on the depo-provera shot. Inform her that you are doing this so that she won't get pregnant, but that it will NOT prevent STD's. I'm not saying she's having sex, or that you should accuse her of it. Both me and my best friend have had 4 teen girls between the 2 of us, and while we do our best to be there and watch...

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The temp hand on my 05 Chevy impala isn't working. Mechanic says 500 to 600 to fix. Is there a quick fix? If your thermostat is located where the thermostat is located on my 2001 Impala...no there's no 'quick fix' thanks to the less-than-brilliant GM engineers. To replace the $20 thermostat, you have to remove the top half of the engine. I found this out when I was told my intake manifold gasket (which GM thoughtfully made of plastic) was cracked, and that the part was a hundred...

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What food items do you not consume completely, but instead just suck, or lick flavoring off of? Smoked almonds for me. Oh, that'd have to be a certain member of the LAPD...lol (pun intended)

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What repetitious commercials are you tired of seeing?, mine is Allstate Auto insurance. Being a night owl/insomniac, my choices are Girls Gone Wild videos, followed by a commercial for an E.D. product. Really...is that an accident? I think not.

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Doing a research paper on why do young women stay in abusive relationships? Looking for any or all opinions and answers. My mom says she stayed with my dad, and put up with his regular beatings, because she had no way to support the three of us. Statistics would say I would be a woman who would then put up with the same crap in a relationship. That's bull. I think she should have shot him sooner than she did (I was 10 when she finally did). She served one night in jail for it. I would have aimed...

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Can you answer this question with a question? Why do you ask?

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What is the first thing that comes to mind when I say "Time?" Time in a Bottle by Jim Croce

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What is something people lie on in the summer? How they came about that 'perfect' tan.

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What is the first thing that comes to mind when i say GREEN? M&M's

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What are some of your favorite johnny cash songs? Some of mine is Ring Of Fire, Folsom Prison Blues (Live 1968 Recording), A Thing Called Love. Gosh there are SO many, but I really like his rendition of "Hurt". http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go

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Is it true most lesbians don't cook at home cuz they prefer to eat out? Does that mean that most straight guys don't cook at home also?

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Have you ever shown your attitude to your boss or any senior at work?What was the result? Yes...about 5 months ago I took a part-time job at the local McD's to help make ends meet. Well, there's a manager there, who I still wonder how she ever made it into management, because her people skills suck, as do her managerial skills. I have a give-what-you-get attitude toward people...be nice to me, and I'll be nice back. Be a bee-och, and I'll see you, and raise,...

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What does McDonald's do with 5 lb bags of sugar? Don't tell me it's for the coffee because I am pretty sure they use packets for that. The Sweet Tea is made fresh several times per day at my McDonald's, and each 5 gallon bucket gets an entire bag of sugar. There is no sugar added to the shake mix.

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Is McDonalds about they're employee's or money? Money...trust me, it's money

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Are double cheeseburges on the dollar menu at your local Mc Donalds? Not anymore. Now a double cheeseburger costs $1.19. But they did add the 'new' McDouble, which is a double cheeseburger with one less slice of cheese, which costs $1.00

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How does McDonald's cook its eggs? There are 3 types of eggs at McD's: folded, round, and scrambled. The folded eggs come in to the restaurant in large plastic packages, and are pre-made somewhere else and reheated in the store; the scrambled eggs come in a quart size container of liquid eggs, and the round eggs are the only ones that actually come out of the shell that day, they are cooked by a combination of frying on...

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Have you ever received a dirty phone call that you actually enjoyed? Yes, but it was kinda an accident. I was engaged, and my fiancee and I had been on about a 3 hour phone call till the wee hours. Shortly after we hung up, my phone rang, assuming it was him calling, I answered. The guy started talking dirty to me, and thinking it was him joking around, I played back. Funny part was, when I asked my fiancee about it later, he said it wasn't him, then...

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What would be a funny last name to have if you were going to be a doctor (i.e. Doctor Paine)? I saw an ob/gyn dr. once, his name was Dr. Massengil...I had the hardest time not laughing.

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Would you agree, that the best time to watch "Dirty Jobs" hosted by Mike Rowe, is while you're eating? Dirty Jobs, those natural birth shows, or the real-life ER or autopsy shows, I'll have a plate of spaghetti (or whatever) and not bat an eye...now my 15 yr old will watch me eating while watching such shows, and ask me "how can you do that?"

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Would it be fair to assume that a one armed person has more short sleeve shirts than long sleeve shirts? Yes if the one-armed person lives in Florida, no if they live in Alaska.

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Can someone tell me what the hell is going on with the size of ice cream containers these days? Use to be a half gallon then less, then today I noticed they are slightly larger than a Ben & Jerry's container. Aaawwwww! Has anyone other than me noticed the same phenomenon with toilet paper over the last few years? Rather than increase the price, they just reduce the amount of product.

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Is there a such thing as a gay Christian? I believe they can. My sister was born lesbian, and I don't think it's a choice. I also believe that "All have sinned and come short of the glory of God", means that none of us is perfect and no one should be pointing fingers. That being said, I believe all sins might be equal to God (though not in my mind), but who knows. I think that according to the bible, that...

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Our adopted teens (18,19) have strong 'you owe us' attitude. $ is very tight so we want them to get jobs to earn $ for clothes & save for car. We've made sure each have min. $70 per week, so they do have $. is this horrible? they think so. Adopted or not is irrelevant. $70 per week is outrageous. That is $7,280 per year between the two of them...I hope you are deducting that on your taxes as "household employees" and that they are earning it. I worked from the day I turned 14, and am now 41. My 15 year old daughter does not get her $5 per week allowance if I have to tell her to do any of her three chores: feed...

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How to know if it's a prime number or not using visual basic? Public Function IsPrime(ByVal lValue As Long) As Boolean Dim lCtr As Long Dim lRes As Long Dim lCount As Long 'eliminate even numbers right away lValue = Abs(lValue) If lValue Mod 2 = 0 Then Exit Function For lCtr = 1 To lValue lRes = lValue Mod lCtr If lRes <> 0 Then lCount = lCount + 1 End If Next IsPrime = (lCount = lValue - 2) End...

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In general, what receives more views.. the American Presidential Inauguration or the Super Bowl? Usually, I would have to say, the Super Bowl. However, this year, I would bet the stats say the Inauguration will have had more viewers.

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Do you enjoy long walks on the beach and candle light dinners Yes

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Do normal people scare you? No, I am not afraid of normal people. They are like the easter bunny, the tooth fairy and santa claus, they don't exist.

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I have been dating my bf for a year and half, he has met my daughter and yet he still doesn't want to move in together. He talks about it, but doesn't say when. Even tho he knows I am currently looking to move. What is the best way to handle this? A b/f is just that, someone you are dating, which may or may not develop into something long-term. Your daughter, however, is a life-long commitment & relationship. She is your first priority. If you want or need to move, then do so. The b/f has nothing to do with that decision. If you press the issue and he's not ready, then that may end the relationship, or worse, you'll...

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Is there a website that I could visit to find out how to write a phrase in Gaelic? If so, would you share a link to it? Try these: http://www.irishgaelictranslator.com/ http://www.savegaelic.org/

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How do you know if your doing it right? If you are the only one happy when it's done, then you're probably doing it wrong. If you and others are happy when you're done, then you're probably doing it right...whatever it is.

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Which do you change more often, your mind or your underwear? I change my undies daily, my mind...probably 10 times a day...maybe I should begin changing my undies every time I change my mind and that'll break me of the habit of changing my mind so much? Or, it'll just increase the amount of undies and detergent I have to buy, so, maybe not...lol

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Whats the worst thing a man can say to a women during labor? Do you think the doc can put a couple of extra stitches in to tighten that up?

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What is something that it NOT very fun to do naked? Jumping hurdles, being a catcher on a baseball team, or competing in an MMA/UFC event

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Thoughts on Grissom's last episode of CSI. One of my all-time favorite shows...1st Sara went, then Warrick, now Grissom? It isn't going to be the same show AT ALL, and I don't think I will love it like I used to. {{toryoh needs a tissue}}

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What makes you feel new again? A brazilian bikini wax

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What is something that it NOT very fun to do naked? Jumping jacks....I get the worst black eyes

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Whats the worst thing a man can say to a women during labor? After about 4 hours into a 14 hour labor, my then-husband asked me "about how much longer do you think this is going to take, I'm getting hungry". I suggested he place his balls in my hand so we could share my contractions together, but he wouldn't take me up on it.

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Several years ago, United States Postal workers were going on gun shooting rampages, enough so the term "going postal" became quite the quip. What is the cause of the decline in such incidents now? (humor welcomed) I was an employee of the USPS from 1989 to 1992. After about a year there, I fully understood why people went "postal". They promote the laziest and stupidest to supervisory positions. In 1989 I was 21 and elated to be making $30,000 per year for such an easy job. By 1992, they couldn't pay me enough to put up with the stupidity, so I quit and joined the Army. (Talk about...

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I have decided to write down my deepest secrets and leave them anonymously around public places hiding them in things. What is your opinion on this, would you be interested in doing something like that? Do you think it could be a new form of therapy? Hi LA...hate to burst your bubble, but this has been done. My daughter and I got some books called Post Secrets. Some are sad, some are funny. You should check them out! http://www.amazon.com/PostSecret-Extraordinary-Confessions-Ordinary-Lives/dp/0060899190

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My daughter turned 15 today. Why is everyone giving HER presents just for being born? Where are my presents for the 18 hour delivery process and stitches in unnamed places? lol lol...that's funny...I do buy her flowers (started this only after I gave birth and got a clue) on my birthday (and wish I had hit the lottery so it could be a house).

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Why do people but mixed lunch meat (ham & turkey for ex) with cheese and all the fixings in a sandwich when you can't differentiate between the flavors? Let's look at this from a different perspective. Let's say you love chocolate syrup...good all by itself. And let's say you love whipped cream...all by itself. And let's say you love eating something else, also good by itself. But, if you were to put a little chocolate syrup and whipped cream on that other thing you might like, then it makes a whole new flavor, with...

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With what prescribed medications do you "tweek" the dose, i.e. take more than what is prescribed? Lol...I have 4 prescribed meds, 2 for high cholesterol, 1 for anxiety, and 1 anti-depressant. My problem isn't taking MORE than I should, it's that I take them sporadically rather than daily. I do take the cholesterol meds regularly for a couple of weeks right before my dr. orders a blood test, just so she'll stay off my butt, even though I should take them daily.

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How often would you use your computer and for what, if you had no internet connection? Let's see...some of my bills I have automatically debited from my checking, all the rest I pay online. Having to go back to writing an actual check and finding a stamp would SUCK. Otherwise, I would still continue to keep my Excel spreadsheet of all my finances (I can tell you to the penny how much interest I pay on my house and car per day). Other than that, I would use it to save my...

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Describe a missed opportunity that could have changed your life? When I was married, my then-husband was offered a job with his company in Germany. I declined to go, because I felt "we" weren't stable enough to move together out of the country. Sometimes I wonder how things would have went had we moved.

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Under what circumstances did you file charges against a relative? Did you follow through with the course of action you started? Yes I did...and followed through. In Sept. 2004, my sister Crystal used my vehicle without my permission (as in, took my keys while I slept). I reported it stolen and she was charged with Unlawful Use of a Vehicle. I'll be damned if 11 months later my other sister Cheryl didn't do the same thing...took my car for a 10 minute trip down to grab some lunch...several hours later she...

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How many words or phrases can you come up with that start with the word CORN? corn cornball cornbread corncake corncob corncrake corncrib cornea corneae corneal corneas corned cornel cornelian cornels corneous corner cornerback cornered cornering cornerman cornermen corners cornerstone cornerways cornerwise cornet cornetcies cornetcy cornetist cornets cornettist cornettists cornfed cornfield cornflakes cornflower cornhusk cornhusker...

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Where is the wost place to shout "I need sex"? At an abortion clinic? (I know---crude...but no worse than saying at church)

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Who's your favorite crime fighter? Hong Kong Phooey...lol I'm telling my age

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When scampering off alone into the woods, one should always be careful of what? Squatting over leaves of three

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Do you like muffins? Yes I do...and for those with a twisted sense of humor, see the You-tube video about muffins http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tcR19y7GPM

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Should I be lazy and just shoot candy out of a potato gun from the couch so I don't have to keep getting up to answer the door to hand out goodies? OK...I guess I'll be the only naysayer on here. Funny as it sounds, it would take all the fun out of seeing the little ones all dressed up. Not to mention, someone has to go to the door to give the parents a hard time who are out with their 6-month old babies trick-or-treating. Honestly, we all know those babies won't be eating that candy. Feel free to shoot potatoes at those...

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How do you know if THEY are the love of your life, when your life isn't over? and nothing is forever. Short Answer: You don't know. But if you can picture yourself taking care of the other person through financial hardship, illness, cancer, whatever, and you've been with them a while (not just a few weeks or months), they maybe THEY are the love of your life. And contrary to recent culture, marriage CAN still last a life-time. I still believe that, even though mine didn't, but...

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Do you think it's unfair that women can get breast implants, but there are no penis implants? Just a guess here as I'm not a guy, but I'd say that a guy wouldn't go around bragging about his new implant, whereas a girl would. Plus if you read that article I linked to, it's way expensive.

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Have you ever done something so stupid that your friends never let you hear the end of it? Yes. I used to own a hoop-dee and drove it to Florida. Every time I stopped to fill up, I checked the oil. It looked low so I put a quart in. I probably did this about 5 times from Ohio to Florida and back to Ohio. I got back to Ohio and told my boyfriend that the car was driving like crap. He checked it and said "what the hell did you do?". Turns out I was checking the...

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Do you think it's unfair that women can get breast implants, but there are no penis implants? There ARE penis implants available to men. See: http://menshealth.about.com/cs/penishealth/a/penis_enlarge_2.htm

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Cheating boyfriend caught..I was the other woman. He wasn't married but engaged, which I didn't know about until she (his fiancee) emailed me to tell me. I confronted him he denied it and very angered. He won't speak to me now..I want revenge, help!!! You should be glad he's not speaking to you. And be very glad you aren't the one engaged to the loser. Speaking from experience, don't worry about revenge. Let it go as a lesson learned. He obviously has no conscience, so revenge might not work anyway. But try to learn from it. Were there clues, like, he never let you come to his place and you always hooked up at your...

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What items have exceeded your expectations of quality & use. I had one towel I used everyday for 15 years, it was still in good condition when I threw it out. When I was 18 I worked full-time at NCR World HQ. I left there to move to FL and they gave me a going-away party where I received among other things, a beach towel and a coffee mug, both with hearts on them. I still have both and that was 23 year ago. Kinda funny, but I can't part with them because of that.

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An unemployed man, despondent over his financial problems killed his wife, three children, mother-in-law and himself in an upscale community. Why not JUST himself? Can anyone offer a reason as to why he felt the need to murder his whole family? Another thing I don't get is, if you search on India median household income, it's about $500 U.S. per year. So, wouldn't being "poor" over here be so much better than living poor in India?

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How will it be possible for me to run over and write my name in that fresh cement with all those people watching? Send a flare up in the opposite direction. While everyone is looking at the flare, run over to cement and scribble away. Silly boy, use your resources! Lol.

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When was the last time you HOBBLED? December, 1999. While carrying my infant son through a snow-covered parking lot, I stepped in a pot-hole, fell, and sprained my ankle big time. Baby boy escaped without a scratch thankfully.

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A new study suggests that people prefer cars to appear dominant, masculine and angry. Would you agree? Mmmmm....yes. Have you seen the pics of the 2009 Charger (even though I detest Dodge it's hot looking), or the 2009 or 2010 Camaro, or the new Mustang...or hey let's go for a Saleen S-7 or a McLaren. While I guess the American-made cars could be described as masculine and angry, (I'm female and just think they're hot), I would describe the Saleen and McLaren as dominant,...

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An unemployed man, despondent over his financial problems killed his wife, three children, mother-in-law and himself in an upscale community. Why not JUST himself? Can anyone offer a reason as to why he felt the need to murder his whole family? I want to answer this from someone who has been diagnosed as bi-polar, which most of the rest of the world seems to think translates to bat-ass-crazy. It isn't. Well, at least not in my case. I can't imagine what this guy was thinking. I have 2 kids, and while I have once or twice fantasized about my ex's untimely demise during our 5 years of litigation, I would never,...

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Ladies how many guys have you had in 1 night??? how? I was dating "F" initially, then started seeing "J" on the side. "J" wanted me to leave "F" for him. In retrospect, I should have. So, no, I'm not with either. From what I heard, "F" died at the age of 30, supposedly of a "sudden heart attack". My bet it was coke induced. Sad.

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The best music can be found______________ someplace other than at a karaoke bar

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Wackity wack wack wack! was all you heard? Yes officer, and I have no idea why there are parts of my new Windows Vista keyboard embedded in my forehead. Honest.

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What's the most peculiar thing you ever seat belted in a vehicle? I've strapped in boxes & plants. A birthday cake in a box that I didn't want sliding around.

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I don't understand...why do you keep touching me? Well if you don't understand, then I must be doing it wrong.

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Take 2 asprins and call _________ in the morning? a taxi?

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What are you impervious to? I am impervious to any type of seafood...lol

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I'm looking for a new partner, who here is up for the task? At 40, I'm too old to become a cop. How about a life-partner?

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Where do you buy your bedding from? do you prefer higher thread counts when it comes to bedsheets? I get my 600+ thread-count sheets from a store named Kohl's. At Christmas, they have great sales. No offense to Nightowl, but Overstock is OverPriced, on almost everything I've shopped for. My last set of 600 thread count was about $60 last December. Polyester is like crack....it's everywhere, but just say no. Lol.

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What takes what seems like forever to make or grow but only seconds or minutes to destroy? My children (and their innocence). And God help the poor bastard that destroys it, because Momma is an expert shot.

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What year was Marijuana officially made illegal in the US? The Marijuana Tax Act was in 1937. Criminalization was later. See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_history_of_marijuana_in_the_United_States

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What applications do you use Vaseline for? If you ever eat lots of chiles or other hot foods, it can be a good burn preventative if applied the next morning before you get moving, so to speak.

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I'm interested in purchasing a miniature living Bonsai tree. I don't feel comfortable with buying one on line. Where can I go to look in person who might sell them? Hashimoto Nursery 310 473 6232 Kimura Bonsai Nursery 818 343 4090 Kuragami Little Tokyo Florist 213 617 0005 F.K. Nursery 310 473 2104 Fuji Bonsai Nursery 818 367 5372 Yamaguchi Bonsai Nursery 310 473 1075 I can't vouch for accuracy of phone numbers as they came off the internet. Happy hunting.

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Why are you so stingy with point giving? it doesn't cost you anything! I'm not, in fact I gave you many points today!

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Is there anyone here who DOES NOT shake out there laundry before placing it in the dryer? No...I do NOT shake it first. That is the dryer's job. I also don't blow on it first to get it started drying. And to my mother's horror, I don't even separate lights from darks...lol I'm still waiting for the washer/dryer combo that'll wash then dry (and if it could fold and put away that'd be great). They invented a stove that can refrigerate your...

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I'm looking for a theme song, one that fits me, my job & personality. So I call on my AB friends to come to my request, are you up for the challenge? The Good, The Bad & The Ugly by Bound For Glory If you could see the things that my eyes have seen You'd get a better understanding of the things that motivate me I've been to many places, I've seen so many scenes I've met so many faces, it all seems like a dream Wherever there is good, the bad always follows Those that live for today, and those that live for...

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We pay 400.00 in child support, she was not working when divorce took place, now is pretty well off. We are struggling to pay this plus take care of our small child... Would her income effect our child support? Absolutely her income would effect your support. Go to Child Support Enforcement and request a re-calculation of support. Sometimes they will only do this every so often (every 3 years in Ohio). If that's the case, you can file for a review of support with the courts.

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Can the person who is supposed to pay child support file the petition themselves to get it into court, or does the plaintiff have to be the one to file it? Either party may file a petition with the court. If you already have court ordered support and are seeking to get the amount changed, sometimes you can request a review through the Child Support Enforcement Agency to get the amount amended.

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Can you write a sentence where all the words in the sentence start with the letter B? No, but Dr. Suess could: Big brown bear, blue bull, beautiful babboon blowing bubbles biking backward, bump black bug's banana boxes, Billy Bunny's breadbasket, Brother Bob's baseball bus and Buster Beagl's banjo-bagpipe-bugle band

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If sneakers were food, how would you prepare it? If it were my sneakers, I'd have to become an anorexic.

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Oh my god ! budweisser is being bought out by forien country can you believe it? Don't drink Bud, I drink Michelob. Last I read, the powers-that-be at Anheuser were saying no to the buyout. http://www.wallstreetfighter.com/2008/06/budweiser-kings-will-say-no-to-buyout.html

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What is that one thing in your home that you always remember seeing but can never find when you need it? Do YOU have my fingernail clippers?

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If marriage is just a piece of paper, why do people take it so seriously? That piece of paper that costs only $50 to purchase where I live, costs Thousands of dollars, lots of heartbreak, and many sleepless nights should you decide you no longer wish to live by the boundaries of the "that piece of paper". So no, it isn't just a piece of paper. It was never designed to be that way. It is sad that so many take the commitment so lightly. Think about...

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My boy friend has a daughter thats 17 and pregnant there was supervised visitation for a while now he can see whenever they live in california can he legally take her to vegas and sign for her to get married? please hurry they are on the way If he's not the custodial parent, no.

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"Reality shows"....which one do you think is the absolute stupidest? (I know, there are many). I'll have to cast my vote for "Groomer Has It"

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What trends do you dislike? I absolutely, positively can not stand to see guys wearing pants with the waist down past their rumps with their underwear hanging out. This drives me insane. Who ever thought this was fashionable? It looks retarded. I love to see these guys on an episode of Cops trying to run, only to have their pants fall down. Same goes for girls whose pants are too low in back and they show g-strings,...

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Can you write a phrase from a song that doesn't really make sense, but works in it?...example: "She's My Kinda Rain" A Whiter Shade of Pale

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My child has been playing games with her mother an me, she has been seeing this boy who just turned 18 an went to my sisters house an spent the night i caught her with him the next day' after i'd told her to stay away from him what should i do? 1) Put the fear of God into the boy by whatever means necessary 2) Have your wife beat your sister's ass (she may want to anyway) 3) Put your daughter on depo-provera shots 4) Tell the nice young gentleman he can date your daughter provided he purchases the following item and provides you with the only key http://www.latowski.de/latowskiFlash/410.htm

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It's so hot outside that _______? (fun answers encouraged) I could water the garden with the sweat from under my ta-ta's

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I just opened a new restaurant an was wondering how many dogs i'll need to do the dishes ? business is great an can't find enough people to hire'help''? Depends on the size of the dog--either one or two mastiffs, or a couple dozen chihuahuas.

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Have you ever been to jail? What crime did you commit? How long did you serve? Never been in jail. I'm the black sheep in my family. My sister is in prison now, my dad gets out of prison in either July or August '08, my other sister has been in and out of county more times than I can count, and my mom's been in a couple times too for little things (hitting a cop, DUI's, but shooting my dad only got her one night in jail).

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Do psychics always get the Medium size? lol...no, but I'd bet they know what size they're going to get before they get it

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What songs do you recommend for getting over a broken heart? OR any "I hate you" songs? lol Godsmack--I F**king Hate You

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Bagpipes, do you find them irritating or fun? I love them too...find it fascinating how people can get good at an instrument like that, love the sound.

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Have you ever wondered who first looked at something and said "Yeah... I think I'll eat that"? What did YOU first think of when you saw this question? Pigs feet...and people actually pickle them first? Ewww

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Potatos have eyes, yet cannot see. Corn grows on ears, yet cannot hear. What other oxymoronic foods can you think of? Heads of lettuce

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GIRLS: What's your favorite Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Action movie? Don't lie and say you've NEVER seen one. We all know you have seen at least one with a guy/your BF/your husband/your s/o. Did you truly think it was a good movie? Braveheart, Predator, and Terminator 2...among others

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Does a singer's sexual preference matter if you like the song? The only person whose sexual preference matters to me would be my significant other.

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Complete: All work and no _______ makes Jack a dull boy? giving oral

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Who passed out the "pissy pills" today? GEEZE! I think I almost OD'd on those last Thursday...have no idea why I got up so pissy. I was even annoying myself for being so bitchy. The xanax helped a little.

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If someone treats a masochist kindly, are they being sadistic? That has to be in the top 5 of the funniest questions I've seen on here!

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A posting on Craigslist caught a friend of mine off-guard. He sent it to me with the subject "WTF?" and line "This is a PRIME example of WHY some people shouldn't be allowed to breed." What do YOU think? (See my answer for the post and his email.) I say "what's wrong with our government for not requiring her and others like her (both men and women) to get mandatory sterilization".

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What's your favorite food to eat with rice? Chicken and broccoli

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Whats your favourite food from somewhere other than america Would have to be either Italian (lasagna) or Mexican (enchiladas)

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What is your favourite colour/flavour Skittle? The strawberry red one

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Have you seen the movie Iron Man, did you like it? I loved it. I took my kids to see it...we all liked it. Actually I enjoyed it more than I thought I would, especially the last line.

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Do you know which bird flies the fastest in the AIR? The peregrine falcon (Falco peregrinus) is the fastest living creature, reaching speeds of at least 124 mph and possibly as much as 168 mph when swooping from great heights during territorial displays or while catching pry birds in midair. I'm not sure how fast it flies in places other than air...lol

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You have the chance to thank any person in the world for something that they've done for you. Who do you thank? What did they do? Probably have to be my best friend of 28 years, for being there for me since I was 12.

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Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow what do you always do daily? Fortunately...wake up

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What does the proverb 'he who pays the piper calls the tune' mean? means that the person who provides the money for something can decide how it should be done

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What does the Latin phrase 'sub judice' mean? In law, sub judice, Latin for "under judgment," means that a particular case or matter is currently under trial or being considered by a judge or court

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Come into my garden. Which flower do you absolutely have to smell and then pick? Stargazer lilies...had them in my wedding and my apartment smelled like them for a week afterwards...mmm

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Will humanity make it to the next millenium? Magic 8-ball says "not likely"

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What comes to your mind when I say "Stupid people"? ...shouldn't breed

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Will you excuse me while I stuff this pasta up my nose? OMG! My daughter did that when she was about 18 months old. I couldn't get it out and took her to the emergency room. The doctor made me pinch the nostril closed that didn't have the macaroni in it, then give her one quick sharp breath. It flew right out of her nostril and onto my cheek. True story.

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Do you or your s/o talk during sex? If so does it do anything for you? My comments are more like "don't stop", "faster", "harder", "yes, there"....

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What is your thoughts of sex before marriage? Do you test drive a car before you buy it?

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What's your favorite part of the body to look at? I love a great smile first. I also love a guy to have that nice V-shape from his shoulders to his waist, and a decent amount of derrier, great thighs, a strong jawline. A hairy back....um, no.

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I prefer to refer to the intimacy of a man and a woman as making love. Who agrees with me? Why? I'm a female, and rarely have I ever used that term. It's saved for those I've been with that I've actually loved. But back "in the day" there were quite a few that, like a guy, I just liked the look of and was just looking for a good quick lay, no love involved. Plus, I think that even if you do love the person, there's a difference between "making...

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Which is better, a cold beer or doggystyle? I'll take both thanks.

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Has anyone used online Opticians to get your glasses? Yes. I've gotten 2 pair from Zinni Optical. (They were recommended by Clark Howard). Let's just say you get what you pay for. But they're great for a spare pair.

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Why did God make men physically stronger than women? His original intent was that men would protect women. But then He gave people free will. When He saw that not all men were protective of women, he invented the Glock Model 19 for women.

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Whats the best speed to drag a pedophile down the road? Fast enough that he can't undo the rope, slow enough that it takes him/her a long time to die...and do it in Ohio, as we have lots of potholes here. If they live through it, drop him/her off at the nearest prison, I hear the inmates have their own special punishments for those people.

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Theres no aphrodisiac like loneliness? what do you think this means, do u think its true You know how they say people get better looking at closing time? It's along those lines. If you're feeling lonely, you may be inclined to take something home to assuage the loneliness that you otherwise wouldn't touch with someone else's ______.

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What happened when you sat on Santa's lap? He told me I was on his naughty list, then he turned me over his knee and spanked me...oh wait, that was someone else.

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It is Saturday night, I am alone, my heart is broken and there is NOTHING on TV. Do I just AB all night or would you go out if you were me? Staying home on AB could either be fun or boring. Going out could either be fun or boring also. But at least staying home won't result in getting drunk and doing something you'll regret later.

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Why do men complain about the silent treatment? Isn't that, like, "free time"? When I was married, I began using it after he told me that he hated it. I figured it bothered him more than having ignorant arguments with him.

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Do you nag too much? Not if you do what I want, when I want, how I want it done...lol

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Why does life suck sooooooooooooo much? Life doesn't always suck...sometimes it blows

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When did your life start getting complicated? Somewhere around the time I saw the bright light and promptly got smacked on the a** by the doctor

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If you to had to name your first name after a kind of tree and your last name after a kind of animal ,what would your name be? Since it doesn't appear taken, I'll be Cherry Beaver

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Would you mind being TASERED with points for telling me something witty? In basic training, we had to walk through the tear gas chamber, after walking in with our masks on to prove they worked. Some females walked out puking and snotting everywhere, but it didn't really bother me, so I assumed they were weak, since our D/S's were in there with no masks on and they were fine. I just wondered if the taser was along the same lines. I'd still do it,...

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Don't you just hate it when you're eating a grilled cheese, and the cheese goes from being hot and melty to sorta warm and just there? I know I do. Solution: eat faster

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Would you be willing to submit to a strip search? I didn't know willingness was an option...if it is, then we're playing a different game, and you'd better be planting some good evidence on me.

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Does your fear of being harmed or killed stop you from interferring in troublesome situations? Depends...if my kids are with me...my goal is to get them the he** out of the situation. If not, then yes, I have stepped in to a couple of "iffy" siutations. I'd rather die doing something noble than keel over dead from cancer or a heart attack or something.

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Would you mind being TASERED with points for telling me something witty? Actually...I'd like to be tasered just to see what it feels like, does it really incapacitate someone, etc. I once touched an small electric fence we put up to keep our dogs in the yard, just to make sure it didn't hurt them too much. Didn't feel anything the first time I did it, but the next day, it had rained and the ground was wet, and well..it was a little zing. But hey, I...

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Is that a GUN in your pants?....or are you just happy to see me? If I have a gun in my pants...you'd probably arrest me, but that's ok, I'm into handcuffs. If you have a gun in your pants, depending on the model, then I'm probably happy to see you...lol

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Have you hugged your friendly neighborhood POLICEMAN? Well, since you're not in my neighborhood, I'd have to say no.

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Soooo just what ARE you going to do with that gloved hand? I'll wear a rubber glove over the gloved hand, asphysiate the ex, then go to a remote location, burn both gloves, and ensure I have an alibi with (someone whose name I can't disclose)...and fortunately, yes, I've been in the ex's home enough times that there's reason for my prints to be in his home...oops...is that too much information?

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Would you be willing to share what your job is and how much you make doing it? Wages don't always reflect your skillset, so please don't feel embarassed to be honest. My degree is in computer programming...my last job in that field was $48,000 per year. But, I hated it. So now I'm a substitute teacher of elementary school kids. I like it better, work less hours, and of course, make significantly less.

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You are sitting upstairs in your office, gazing out the window while on hold, all of a sudden you see YOUR car, driving down the street...WHAT DO YOU DO? I'll pray like hell that either the car is never retrieved, or is returned totalled. It's a Chevy Impala and I hate it and can't wait to replace it. I miss my Explorer. I'll probably even give them a headstart by not reporting it missing until I get off work.

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Is it true what they say, if you ain't lovin' you ain't livin'? If you mean a significant other...no, not necessary...been celibate since June 2001. I love my kids though, and until they're grown and out of the house, that's enough for me. If I learned anything from my divorce, it's that I can't pick 'em, so I'll wait until the kids are grown, so that if I do make any more mistakes in that area, at least my kids won't...

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Come on folks, move along now....is there really anything here you need to see? Nope...I'm the bee-och in the car behind the rubber-necker, honking and cussing. If your life is so boring that you feel the need to watch the brew-ha, go park somewhere, walk back to watch, but get your a** out of my way, I'm sure I have somewhere else to be, doing something better with my time (like getting on AB)...lol

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What have you had enough of? Hillary & Obama

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Whats the point in talking someone out of committing suicide when their death will have no impact on others, or effect anything?..I understand the whole being politcally correct thing of talking someone down but still...? Pardon me if this is politically incorrect, but I believe in assisted suicide, and I believe all people in gangs should be free to off each other. At least in the latter case, it will keep these idiots from breeding and adding to the collective problems of society and lowering the collective IQ. If I were to become so ill that I would be a burden to my family/children/friends, then someone...

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ANGER IN RELATIONSHIPS: I am curious to know how many couples name call when things finally reach a boiling point. I had asked a similar question a while back & received little response. I have to admit to being guilty of name-calling in the heat of the moment. Of course, I didn't mean it when I called him a dumb-a**ed, needle-di**ed, mother fu**er, but hey, he pi**ed me off. In retrospect, maybe doing that whilst I threw my wedding ring at him wasn't such a good idea.

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What is J-Walking? Is it still a crime? In Dayton, Ohio, you're only cited for it when the cops know that you're a prostitute, but they can't cite you for what you're really doing for lack of evidence. (according to my sister, who has personal experience in this area)

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Had enough tonite have you? I'm a 40 year old female...so chances are no. I'll need a 20 year old male who can go again, and again and again. Or, if you were talking about how much beer I've had, then yes, I'm almost there.

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Anyone ever eat brownies with weed in them? Nope, but had some "specially made" chocolate chip cookies back in 1983.

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What item(s) do you most frequently misplace? That'd have to be Christmas presents I've hidden from my kids, then can't remember where I put them.

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Is Barney (the purple dinosaur) the hellspawn of the One Eyed One Horned Flying Purple People Eater? If so, who was the other parent? Grimace

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What are the most predictable scenarios for a horror film? What drives me nuts is there's always some bimbo who's getting chased...and always falls. What, are all bimbo's clumsy?

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What food(s) do you refuse to even try? Seafood, especially anything raw. Tongue, tripe, or other organ meats of animals. Artichokes, yams, anchovies.

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Do you prefer ice cream or whipped cream to top pie or cake? Ice cream on cake I'll be eating...whipped cream on pie you'll be eating.

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Fine!...but will you at least give me a chance to explain? If we're dating and some appendage of yours is in the orifice of another...no explanation needed...hope you're wearing your vest. If you're wearing my underwear...you might get to give me a 5 second explanation...make it good...like you were trying to find the size, so as to go buy me some lingerie. Anything else..I'll have to think about it, which usually doesn't...

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What makes scream with frustrasion? People who misspell frustration and people who answer a question twice??

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"No"??? Whaddya mean "no"? No...that does not go there...well, ok, just this once.

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WHEN you get to heaven whats the first thing you say to GOD? Wow...you really are forgiving aren't you?

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Will you state two truths and 1 lie about yourself? Don't say which is the truth and which is the lie and I will try and guess. :) 1) Sometimes I feel it necessary to lie 2) I will give you my opinion whether you like it or not 3) I have not answered this question

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If you're TO COOL for SCHOOL, what will you DO? I suspect those that think that will be seeing people in your line of work frequently.

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Did anyone get there Economic Stimulus check today? nope...but IRS website says it'll be here May 9th...we'll see

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If you could ask me anything, what would it be? How do you relieve stress? And how old are you?

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Who else here wants to ROCK OUT with their GLOCK OUT? Mine's a model 19 9 mm...Count me in

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If you happen to go to the woods and see a bear wearing a executive suit what's the first thought that will come to your mind? wow...somebody must've dropped a hit into my drink

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Do you think there are people who are truly devoid of any prejudices? Yes...Mother Teresa...oh wait, she died...so, no.

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How would you fare if you were locked outside your house while butt naked (Don't want to know the original reason)? I'd run around back to my shed and pray I had enough landscaping fabric in the shed to make myself a little black dress to last my till my daughter got home with keys.

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If you could put duct tape over anyone's mouth, who would it be? My sister's....she's an idiot who never has anything good to say...my daughter's when she's been on the phone too long (a teen, so she sort of has an excuse), and my ex, because everything he does is wonderful and he can't wait to tell anyone and everyone how wonderful he is. Oh, and George Bush whenever he has to give a speech that hasn't been pre-written.

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Ladies, where you do you buy your lingerie? Most of the guys I've known like their presents unwrapped. Think of all the time and money I've saved!

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Dumb answers only: why is the sky blue? because it's depressed? I don't know why it's depressed, it gets to look down on everyone.

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What did Delaware? same thing her twin sister Stella wore?

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Can 2 pills of tylenol 3 get you high? or do you need more? Is it safe to drink with alcohol? chances are before you get high off them, you'll experience acetaminophen overdose...which can be deadly. Acetaminophen overdose is one of the most common poisonings worldwide. People often think that acetaminophen, a pain-relieving medicine, is extremely safe. However, it may be deadly if taken in large doses. Symptoms of acetaminophen overdose: * Abdominal pain *...

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What is the plural form of the word "penis?" peni or penises? http://homepages.alumni.os3.nl/~leeuwen/pdf/pluralpenis.pdf Are you kidding? Someone actually wrote a paper on this?

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Can you think of a famous film, and insert the word 'crevice' ? Many thanks. Let me borrow from my kids' movie collection: Finding Crevices 101 Crevices James and the Giant Crevice The Fox and The Crevice

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So ugly that __________________? She's so ugly, when she went inside the haunted house, she came out with an application

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What is the best form of punishment for the 12 year old girls that got into such a brutal fight & what is the best form of punishment for the adults that stood by and watched? The girls--3 days to a week in a prison. The adults--a public flogging.

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For laughs, would you take any title, quote or lyric and substitute one or two words with "soggy bottom(s)"? Life is the art of drawing sufficient conclusions from soggy bottoms. ~~Samuel Butler

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For laughs, would you take any title, quote or lyric and substitute one or two words with "soggy bottom(s)"? Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a soggy bottom. ~~Mark Twain

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Have you ever taken the time to cook up a good snack, only to later realize that you aren't really that hungry? No, but I did spend a bit of time making this chicken dip, only to realize that the recipe sucked when I was done.

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For the first time in five years, i feel like drinking myself into oblivion. You want to talk me out of it, or pull up a barstool and join me? What are we drinking? You're drinking Tequila, I'm holding the keys, a diet coke, and a camera. Go!

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My 17 year old daughter is pregnant. Do I still have to pay child support in Texas? I disagree about having to pay while she's in college. Absent marriage or other acts which would emancipate the child, child support orders continue until the child reaches age 18. If the child is in high school at age 18, support continues until high school graduation. If the child is disabled, it may be possible to continue child support for an indefinite period. Texas law makes no...

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"We the jury find the defendent (Your AB user name) not /guity of _______________? murdering ________ (hold on, I'll flip a coin and see if the blank is filled in with my ex's name or my sister's.)

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If you could give your parents one gift, what would it be? Provided my mom promised not to spend a penny on supporting my drug addict sister, I'd give her enough money to retire on. I'd like my dad to have sanity as he's an idiot.

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Who do you wish you could hold again? My 14 year old daughter...as an infant

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Don't you think that Civil Unions create a little-understood, “second class” category of citizens? Yeah. I do, but I do believe it's better than nothing at all at this point.

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My sister, whom I convinced to come out, says I'm against PDA because she's lesbian. I tell her I don't go to her and her g/f's house and stick my tongue down my husband's throat and grab his a**, so she shouldn't do it at mine. Thoughts? My sister is so bad, that when there's a "hot chick" on a commercial, or out at the grocery, or wherever, she will make sounds, like "mmmmmmmmm" or comments like "I'd like to get me some of that". I have never, nor would I, make the same comments about a male I saw. She's 37...there's no excuse. And she does it in front of my kids. My 14...

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Do you think gay marriage should be allowed with all the same legal rights and privileges of a man - woman marriage? The long and short of my answer is yes...I think it should be allowed. I am a straight woman with a lesbian sister, and have had many g/l friends. I know the people at my church would disagree, but to that I say, I'm not God, therefore am not here to judge. I have seen so many people who have been together for years, who can't make medical decisions for their sick s/o's, or...

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Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills? Because, in reality, there's no such thing as "free"

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If you could ask President Bush any one question and get a full and complete answer, what would you ask? Have you ever taken a speech class? What was your grade?

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What would you do if someone read through your court papers? Lol...not a damn thing...in fact, I used to have a website which I posted ALL my court papers online from my 5 year litigation for custody of my son with my ex. Somehow, my ex had my website closed down (must've threatened to sue) even though all I did was post original documentation filed with the court, which is public knowledge.

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Alright, who do I have to sleep with to get a gold trophy by my name? Isn't a badge better than a gold AB trophy any day?

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Did you ever have to make up your mind? ... Pick up on one and leave the other behind? I don't make up my bed so why should I make up my mind?

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Girls do you think its bad when I am in a relationship, but I am having other feelings for a man. But he is married, and way older than me. Im 18, and he is 32. Any suggestions on what I should do? Married men--always off limits...even those who claim to be separated or going through a divorce. Find yourself a nice 20 year old college guy.

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I have a New York steak thats not gonna BBQ itself!, come on now, who's up for the task!? Sorry...not a grill master...but I make great potato salad. Will that do?

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What TV shows can you watch an episode, and totally get it, but you don't have to follow the entire season? (Like Law and Order) Two and a half men

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What do you wish you could "upgrade"? My relatives first, then my laptop.

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How many times have you run out of gas in your own car while driving? Were you ever with someone else that ran out? Once was all it took. Same thing for locking my keys in the car

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Going to work tomorrow? Not yet, but I'm a sub, so I may get a 6 a.m. phone call saying otherwise.

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Why would a person who has 'very little patience for certain varieties of willful idiocy' even bother responding to questions posted under 'Crazy Thoughts?' Because I think some of the questions are hilarious.

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How do you tell that special someone in your life how much you care? Leave them notes, buy them cards, buy them little things you know they'll like, make their favorite food, do extra things for them that'll save them time.

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Who is the most irritating person in your life? Either the ex, or my 34 year old sister who has no job, never had a bank account, never bought her own car, was a crack addict for 15 years and supported her habit by prostituting, and is now "in love" with a guy who was one of her johns and is 22 weeks pregnant and expects me to be overjoyed for her.

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Will you excuse me...while I FLAUNT my POLICE-ness around? You work in L.A.? Don't you get to do that all the time there? You should try a nice easy job in my big town of 25,000...lol

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IM 5 WEEKS PREGNANT... I JUST FOUND OUT!! IVE HAD 2 ABORTIONS ALREADY AND I DONT WANT TO HAVE ANYMORE, BUT MY BOYFRIEND ALREADY HAS 5 KIDS WITH HIS PAST MARRIAGE... HE WANTS ME TO GET AN ABORTION, HE SAYS WE'RE NOT READY... WHAT SHOU Do YOU want the baby? If so, have it. Either way, you DO know what causes pregnancy right? I would think if he didn't want any more kids, he'd have gotten a vasectomy. As for you, if you don't want kids ever, you can get fixed too. If maybe later you want them, then visit planned parenthood for some birth control. There's no excuse for this mess.

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Do u think i am attractive????I am 5'8, have long blonde hair, green eyes n hav a pretty nice body. You could still be butt-ugly...but I think a big part of attractiveness is based on personality too.

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Would you clean up vomit after someone else other than your child? Gosh...I just did this today while chaperoning a field trip for some 2nd graders...so yes.

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You just caught me stealing from you. Would you turn me in or give me a second chance? :) In a person, I can't stand two things: a liar or a thief. I'd probably beat your a**.

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Do you get mad, get even, or let it go? Yes...and in that order.

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What would you do if you could get away with it? Forget the bank...I'd rob Fort Knox.

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Do you like the subtle approach or a straight talking approach? Give it to me straight, don't beat around the bush, and be honest. I don't have the time or patience to figure out what your analogies might mean.

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Could you would you sleep with some one for the heck of it? Just because you fancied them? Nowadays, no. But back in my early 20's I used to have what I called my "flavor-of-the-month" club. If it looked good and I wanted some, I'd try it.

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Would you watch an execution on pay-for-view? If so and you were offered a choice (different states "offer" gas, electric, hanging, lethal injection, firing squad) would you have a preferrence as to method? I'd watch an execution in person if it were someone who had molested or murdered one of my children (but then I'd probably be performing that execution). Otherwise, no thanks.

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Would you grab a rattle snake for 1 minute for $100,000,000 dollars? For $100,000,000...absolutely...as long as someone was standing next to me with the antidote.

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How bad do you need to go before you are willing to use one of those outdoor "porta-potties?" I'm a female, and I will if I have to go pretty darn bad...and I'll still look for some nearby bushes first.

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What is more common in your roll? A $1, $5, $10 or $20 bill? I use my debit card for almost everything...it's rare that I have cash.

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My 10.5 month old baby is now eating 3 square meals a day of solid graduate food (not baby mush food), in your opinion can he be taken off formula and go to regular cow milk? I was told by my kids' pediatrician "no milk before 12 months as they haven't yet built up the bacteria in their intestines to digest the lactose", and as well, still need the high amounts of iron in formula. After they begin drinking milk, do NOT give them skim or 1% or 2% milk. Pediatrician also told me to give them whole milk until at least age 2 because their brains...

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Why are cheaters often referred to as "dogs" when dogs are loyal and Man's best friend? I don't know. Why does the slang term "salty dog" mean: 1) very experienced, 2) ornery, and 3) sexual partner.

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Can you change your Reenlistment code if it is bad? I know you can file a DD-293 to change your type of discharge, but am not sure about changing your SPN/SPD. You may want to read the following: http://www.apfn.org/APFN/DD214.htm

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I've fallen over my own feet at least five times today. Is it really too much to ask for somebody to catch me the next time? Try staying seated until the alcohol wears off.

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As a meat eater, is there any meat you would not try? (Jews and other religions need not answer for the prohibited sectors) I eat the usual: cow, pig, fish, turkey & chicken. Don't care for deer, rabbit or squirrel. Wouldn't think of trying anything else.

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Does anyone know or is a convicted felon? Please read my answer, there's not enough room My sister -- felony forgery (5 counts) My uncle -- armed robbery My dad -- 2nd degree murder and drug possession I'm probably missing a few more, but I don't associate with my family.

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There should be more of you, have you considered a personality split? Done that...there's the nicer side of me that goes to school as a substitute teacher, then there's the drill sergeant that lives at my house with my 14 year old daughter.

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What's the worst thing you've been attacked by or bitten by? ME: Pack of wild dogs. Gosh...I must be getting off easy...it was my daughter when she was 2...she went through a short biting phase. I bit her back once, and darned if she didn't quit. Of course my mom thought it was mean, but I just thought "hey, it worked".

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What does my 1998 ford explorer sport 4x4 weigh? Vehicle weight is usually listed on the sticker on the side of the door when the door is open...the one that has the VIN on it and stuff.

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I have a 1999 ford Explorer and recently the cigarette lighter fues blew. What fuse is it that I need to replace and where is it located? Fuse location #17 See: http://www.motorcraftservice.com/pubs/content/~WOXEXP/~MUS~LEN/42/99expog1e.pdf

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Where can I puchase a 2000 Ford Explorer owners manual Ebay has one for $3.00 plus $4.25 shipping (Item number 280219432843) There's also a downloadable version at: http://store.payloadz.com/str-asp-i.112376-n.2000_FORD_EXPLORER_OWNERS_MANUAL_eBooks_-end-detail.html

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I need a fuse box diagram for a 2003 Ford Explorer See page 184 (under Roadside Emergencies) https://web.msslib.dealerconnection.com/RightSite/getcontent/myfile.pdf?DMW_OBJECTID=09000c588038be61

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My ford explorer's jack is missing the rod to raise the spare tire back in place.(under the vehicle)Where can I find a replacement part and what specifically is the name of the part? Have you tried calling any local junk yards? Sounds like something you may be able to get there.

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I have a 94 chevy camaro. and something is draining the battery. could it be the fuel pump? Did you check the voltage regulator and then the alternator?

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Shar-Pei diem: seize the wrinkled dog! Can you come up with some fun variations of "Carpe diem"? Carpe Testes

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Has body piercing gone to far, is it getting dangerous? Is this next? (see picts in upcoming answer - not for the faint of heart) Well...I've seen pics of a Prince Albert, and can't figure out for the life of my why a guy would want to do that.

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Can you make a funny movie tile by combining 2 films or shows? Mix and match if you like. (for example, thanks to one of my AB friends, "A Nightmare on Sesame Street") The Good, The Bad, and The Knocked Up

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What's the highest mileage on a car or truck that you have seen that was still running? What make of vehicle was it? (for me it was a Chevy Silverado with just over 600,000 miles) No kidding...a Chevy?

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What celebrity's speaking voice to you like to hear the most? Is it an accent, tone or something else? (Vincent Price for me and both his tone and accent) Patrick Stewart, Sean Connery, and Morgan Freeman

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My ole lady is realy ugly what can i do to help during sex? Turn her over

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Do you have a problem tasting your own body fluids after sex? Not a bit...I expect the other person to, so why shouldn't I?

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Who's into anal? i think its pretty kool. do you? I told you yes last night didn't I?

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I think I am pregnant and my boyfriend is an iv drug user and I'm always in two minds about staying or going. I love him but finally starting to realise the drugs have a stronger pull over him than his love for me. What do I do? Do I have an abortion? My cousin was married to an IV drug user. He got Hepatitis C, which he gave to her. He has now died from it, and she is getting sicker by the day. I say drop him, now, and completely.

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For fun, would you take any title, quote or lyric and substitute one word with "marbles"? Dude, Where's My Marbles?

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What can I catch with pizza and soda? cellulite and heart disease

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How do I it's you? I don't know...how do you? And yes, it's me.

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My Aunt had a Pink artificial Christmas tree.... My mother bought "satin" finished Christmas tree decorations.... what's the Ugliest thing you've seen in Christmas decor? I saw a pink and white Christmas tree in a store, completely adorned with Barbie ornaments

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Does anyone still hang out with their ex? We don't hang out, but we do take the kids to events together.

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What could your spouse do to you for you to think about or consider getting a divorce? 1) Hit me 2) Become a drug addict or alcoholic 3) Cheat on me

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What is the most difficult part about your life after a divorce? Missing my son when he's not with me. I used to think the same about my daughter, but the ex stopped his visitation with her a couple of years ago (she's 14 now).

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During a 69 position do you prefer to be on top or on the bottom & why? M/F? I rather prefer the both of us on our sides

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Gas prices is getting really really steep, as of today, April 20th, what are the gas prices where you live? City and state, please. In Dayton, Ohio today (4/20/08) it's $3.30 a gallon

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If your car breaks down what are the chances you could fix it? If it's outta gas or has a flat...I can do that. Otherwise, where's the number for that tow company. Wish I could find a guy to teach me to change my own oil.

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Why would you consider your state/country the best place to live? I've lived in Florida, Ohio, and Tennessee. I by far prefer Tennessee because it's just a beautiful state. I love the mountains and it just seems to me the people there are very friendly. I live in OH now, but plan to relocate back to TN after the kids are grown. And yeah, the weather here sucks...seems like there are very few blue sky days and the temperatures from day to day can...

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Do you really think you can convince me, that's NOT, a body in your trunk? No...oh my gosh officer that's my ex. Whew, thankfully he typed a suicide note and taped it to his own chest before he crawled into my trunk and shot himself...I'm sure my prints aren't on the gun or the note and he was just trying to frame me.

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Look what you've done' are you happy now? If we're both sticky and sleeping like babies...chances are we're both happy.

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Are we having fun yet If we were...you wouldn't have time to make it to a computer to ask this question.

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How do you discipline your child? I took the cell away from my teen daughter with little effect. Had more luck when I took away all her makeup.

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I have two options..... My better half is almost home..... Do I : A) get off the computer so she don't get pissed or B) stay on and let the relationship go to hell? Leave the computer...take the real person...you only know these people "virtually" and in the end, what's that really worth?

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Outside of getting points what, for you, is the greatest benefit of spending time on AnswerBag? Reading retarded/funny questions which make me laugh.

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If there is a God and he contacted you what would you want to hear? Him telling me what I am doing wrong so I can fix it. Him telling me what (if anything) I am doing right. And "I have granted you the gift of patience" would be a bonus.

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"Pour me something tall and strong. Make it a Hurricane before I go insane. It's only half past twelve but I dont care. _________________________" ...it's beer-30 somewhere?

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If you had a choice either watch porn or the presidental debate which would you choose? Ouch...that -1 DR rating for my answer really hurt...do it again.

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Hey i need a name for my kid he's due in the last week of may'? I like Erik Gabriel...oh wait...I used that

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Did'nt i tell you not to do that again? Yeah...but I know you didn't mean it.

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If you had my body for one day'what would you do with it? If I could...I'd hire you out as a gigolo...then keep the money for myself. If I couldn't do that, I'd hire you out to mow lawns...then keep the money for myself. Either way you'd wake up tired and sore wondering what the he** happened to you yesterday and I'd be out shopping.

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I want you' can i have you? Show me your most recent bank statement and hand me a ruler...I'll let you know.

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If you had a choice either watch porn or the presidental debate which would you choose? If they were all hooked up to lie detectors, I'd take the presidential debate, otherwise, give me porn

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Should a man want anal sex on the first date' is that asking to much from her? yes...aren't they supposed to wine me, dine me, 69 me?

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What do you have planned for the weekend? Friday...take teen daughter to grandma's Saturday...lunch with 8 yr. old son then to a Silverbacks football game with him later Sunday...pick up teen daughter from grandma

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Assuming you found them attractive, and the only way you knew was because you were told, would you date someone who is trans-gendered? My logical mind is saying "sure"... Emotion is doing the icky dance... No...I'll leave that to someone else.

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Do stupid people know that they are stupid? Not until I tell them

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(guys, pay attention) Ladies: For Valentines Day: Good Chocolates in a Fancy Box, or Great Chocolates in a Plain Box? Neither...how about a back massage then he pours some Hershey's syrup on me then...you get the picture

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When you were a kid, your parents made you eat the heal of the loaf of bread. Now that you buy the bread, do you still eat it? Jeez...I'm 40 and my kids ask me why I take the brown crust off of all my hamburger buns and sandwiches...kinda funny

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Will you show me your tattoo? I'll show you two out of three...the 3rd has to wait until ...well, I know you lots better.

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Today, while moving a refrigerator out of storage, we discovered a nest of mice. My assistant screamed like a little girl. What give you the ickies and makes you scream like a little girl? When I lived in Florida...the palmetto bugs...a nice name for huge-ass flying roaches....ewwwwww

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Just a question, not a Rant, but to those of you who DR, how do you justify Down Rating an answer to an opinion question? I DR'd one question, where a mother wanted to know how to divorce her teen daughter, and I DR'd a question and answer to a question where the question was something along the lines of "I'm a lesbian and I think my teen daughter has been eyeing me, should I do her" and some freak lesbian gave her a really long answer in which the bottom line was "yes you should".

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2B or not 2B... Is this the right apartment? Depends...are you delivering my pizza, or are you stalking me?

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Do you still have your Prom Pictures? How long ago did you graduate high school? Graduated in '85...still have them and laugh at them now.

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Eggs with double yokes: Ever encounter one? I'd heard of them, but never saw one till today. Yep...a few times...usually happens in the jumbo size

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Where can i buy a fart filter? I don't know, but when you find out could you let me know? My 8 year old son has issues, oddly every day upon waking.

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It has been proven that children who receive abstinence only sex ed ultimately end up with a higher percentage of unwanted pregnancies and STDs because they are clueless as how to prevent them. Isn't this enough to prove abstinence only doesn't work? No, it just proves that abstinence only sex ed doesn't work. Abstinence works just fine.

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Why is it the last people on earth you'd want to see in public wearing shorts are, without a doubt, the first people you see wearing shorts in public? I can take the shorts, it's all these women that wear too tight or too short shirts, that show their ..umm..less-than-six-pack abs, that makes my bile rise.

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Would you/could you /have you ever dated, lived with or married a police officer? No I haven't, and no I wouldn't. Due to the on-the-job stress, they have higher divorce rates, higher suicide rates, higher alcoholism rates, and frequently miss out on family live with spouses and kids due to their work hours. (at least that's what I've read in studies on the internet)

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You are sitting at the bar and your Ex walks in. The Bartender gives you a knowing nod and hands you a quarter and points to the jukebox. What song do you play? "I Fu**ing Hate You" by Godsmack...go ahead...check out the lyrics

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If Typhoid Mary was the last person left on AB, would you still hang out with her. Or throw her under the bus with everyone else? If Typhoid Mary was the last person left on AB, I wouldn't be here to throw here under the bus.

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If someone Is posessed by the Devil how would you know? They would be college-educated, ride a Harley, have tattoos, work as a computer-weenie by day, and answer to the name of John...oh, wait, that's my ex.

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What is the junkie doing on the cloud? wondering why his pipes and needles keep falling through

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This is a really stupid question, but I'll ask it anyway. Does anyone else completley despise when someone writes the word "hate" like this: "h8"? Cause that really annoys me... not as much as it does when someone uses the word "cause" when they mean "because"

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Does your car's antenna have an antenna ball on it? No...but I've seen some tow hitches that have a pair hanging from them...idiots

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If you have children do you own them? Yes I do...up until they move out...and that includes the 14 year old female who thinks she knows it all, is stubborn, opinionated, out-spoken, and somewhat bitchy. Where does she think she got those traits?

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If your pet was a human what kind of person do you think it would be? My cat can be loud, like's to be petted only when she wants it, otherwise she may bite, and often just wants left alone and is slightly overweight....I think she's the feline version of me.

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Can you prove to us that you are not dreaming right now? How? If I were dreaming...I'd be picking up my new Saleen S7 with my mega millions lottery winnings...not sitting at my computer listening to Saturday morning cartoons in the background.

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In your estimation how many Gb of memory is stored inside your head? Not sure...but I do know it's lower in the a.m. than the p.m.

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What are you really good at? Is it something you like to do? To be really good at something, wouldn't you have to like it...otherwise you wouldn't be good at it?

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Why do some people use the word 'jealous' when they really mean just 'envious?' I looked it up and the first definition of jealous is envious. So they are interchangeable. jeal·ous [ jélləss ] adjective Definition: 1. envious: feeling bitter and unhappy because of another's advantages, possessions, or luck 2. suspicious of rivals: feeling suspicious about a rival's or competitor's influence, especially in regard to a loved...

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What is your favorite crime-solving show? CSI (the original Vegas version)

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What is the worst childrens show you have ever seen? I'm going to have to throw a shout out to "The Wiggles"

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What do you think Adam said to Eve after they got in trouble for eating the apple? Quick...let's go find a beehive...you need a bikini wax

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What can you do that I can't? Suck a golf ball through a garden hose.

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Do you think that everyone (including those too young for sex and those that make terrible parents) should have the right to be a parent? Giving birth isn't a right...it's a duty, that way too many people take too lightly.

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Is there something behind my back? oh my god...is that a dingleberry???

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I seem to have lost my Monkey...Has anyone seen him? Did your beaver eat him?

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Do You Like It Fast and Hard Or Slow and Soft? I get excited really quick...I'll take fast and hard almost every time!! (and I'm female)

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What is the normal "endurance" for a male? Isn't that somewhat dependent upon age...like 30 seconds for a 16 year old and 20 minutes for a 40 year old? At least that was my experience.

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Women: what sex toy do you perfer Never used any...I prefer flesh

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Handjob vs. blowjob? I don't think I give a good hj, but I know I give excellent bj's...references provided upon request.

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Is the relevant in todays world? Yes. The word "the" is the only definite article of the English language. "The" is the most common word in the English language.

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Everything happens for a reason right? If that's the case, why do people grow hair in the buttcrack? It's a true test of a woman's ability to shave.

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Why are aliens attracted to moonshine? Same reason hillbillies are.

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Can slow people fast? Yes...but not vice versa.

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Do you placate your mother to avoid conflict or criticism? No...I just don't answer the phone.

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Do you know who you really are? No. Do you know who I really am?

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If someone took a sample of your hair what do you think would be the biggest component? Diet Dr. Pepper

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What was the most unpleasant punishment you were ever given by your parents? My parents themselves.

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What can you do in one minute? Count to sixty.

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What was the worst thing that happened to you today? Got the blue screen of death on my laptop trying to install something

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What question is too deep for a sunday morning? Honey...what are you thinking about right now?

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I want to know how to get more than $500 in a week,legally.What can I do instead of finding a job? Become a politician.

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Can anyone tell me the full "nantucket" poem...the only part of it I have heard b4 is..There once was a man from nantucket The version I heard was slightly different There once was a man from Nantucket Whose di** was so long he could fu** it Said he with a grin As cu* dripped from his chin "If my ear was a cu** I could fu** it."

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What to you is the most annoying sound in the world? A dripping faucet

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I want to paint my cat purple...what kind of paint should I use? Tuna flavored?

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What U.S president was in administration when you were a senior in highschool? Me- Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan--1st term

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My little sister wants a "sad book" for her birthday. What would you say the "saddest" books are for 11-13 year olds? "Go Ask Alice"...but I wouldn't recommend it for an 11 year old.

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What do you think is scarier(SP) getting your teeth drilled on or getting a shot? Neither. Shots don't bother me, and if I have to get a tooth drilled I always ask if they can do it without numbing me because I hate being numb for hours. The sound of the drill ... I can't stand that though.

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When I say "Black poles & white holes" what comes to mind? sorry...but since you asked: http://www.breedingclub.com/home.htm

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Whould you rather get locked in a room overnight with your crazy ex or spend the night in jail with a sicotic(sp) drunk? I'll take the ex...better the devil you know than the one you don't.

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How old were you when you saw your first totally nude body? At birth...it was my mother...and I've never recovered

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When the name john is said what is the the first thing you that comes to mind? My ex-husband and a toilet...coincidence?

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If you were the coffee pot in your high school teacher's lounge, what would you learn? Which kids are on the teachers' sh** list and who's currently banging the principal.

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Have you noticed that Dick Cheney sounds like the Penguin from Batman? I didn't know he ever spoke...just knew he's not someone to go hunting with.

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Did you know there are people out there who believe the holocaust never happened? Yes...and there are also people who believe men never landed on the moon, and that 9/11 was an inside job and the towers fell due to a controlled demolition. I guess it's just easier for some people to live in the land of denial than to admit the atrocities and evil committed by mankind.

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Which piece of equipment in your office or work area would you most like to take a baseball bat or hammer to? Oohhh...I'd have to vote for that over-priced server, which seems to have problems at the worst possible times.

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Would anyone like to volunteer for troll patrol? I'm new to AB, so ...how do you patrol for a troll? And what exactly is a troll...is it someone who gives other negative points, or is it someone who gives others negative points for no good reason?

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My parents are going through a divorce and I'm being blamed for all of this mess. Is it really my fault? Who do I tell and what do I tell them? If 2 people divorce...it is NEVER the fault of the child (no matter the age of the child). And just my 2 cents, any parent who tells their child that it's their fault is pretty shi**y. It is their marriage...not your and their marriage. Any problem that comes up between them should be handled by them, not you and them. Consequently any blame for the failure of the marriage is between...

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If a lady was married and she took the name Smith, if she and Mr. Smith got divorced, what would her title be: Mrs. Smith, or Ms.Smith? I think you should use whichever you prefer. But I looked up the strict etiquette and it states: The title 'Mrs.' should never be used before a feminine first name. 'Mrs.' means, 'the wife of,' and should only be used before a man's first name, as in 'Mrs. John Smith.' Many people often use the title with a feminine first name, as in...

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In TX. My husband & I are getting a divorce, bc he committed adultery. We haven't filed yet. I ended up having sex with somebody recently, & I told my husband. Should/could I still file on grounds of adultery? First...why did you tell him? If only he had cheated, then yes you could file on the grounds of adultery. But since you technically did too...I don't know. Here are the Texas grounds for divorce. You'll probably have to go for the "no fault". Grounds for Filing: The Petition for Divorce must declare the appropriate Texas grounds upon which the divorce is being sought....

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How do I find out who is downrating my answers or questions? I just got DR'd by someone for a question I answered by mommieof3, in which I thought I gave a really good, valid answer. Whoever DR'd me gave no reason, no comment. That really pisses me off...but I'm sure it's happened to many others. A comment or something should be required.

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I had an abortion on March 12 and unprotected sex March 28. I have not gotten my period yet and have until next Wed. to do so before the 6wks are up for me to have gotten it and feel nauseous and dizzy. Could I be pregnant again? Let's do some simple math: abortions cost at least $300, condoms about $1 each.

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When were bras first created? this is a duplicate

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Why is street gangs glorified in America today? What is happening to us? Personally, I believe they belong in the "kill 'em all and let God sort them out" category.

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Do you believe the "war on terror" is anyway justified? No...I believe that we should have used our best intelligence agencies, spies, and sharpshooters to go take out Osama and been done with it.

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Would you date this person: "Just so you know, i don't like gay people. I love guns... and Idon't believe in welfare. Oh and I'm in the military."? No...because of the gay prejudice.

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Should people have to have a license to have children? Yes...they would be required to take parenting classes, pass an IQ test with a sufficient score, prove that they can adequately provide for the child, pass a background check and a mental stability test....then they can get the license.

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If your 14 year old daughter came home and said that she got pregnant by her 14 year old boyfriend, what would you do? That wouldn't happen. When my daughter turned 14, I put her on the birth control shot, even though she isn't yet sexually active. There will be no accidents, and she WILL go to college.

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If the car you drive today was a Transformer... what would it transform in to? A tank so I could drive over the morons who pull out in front of me then drive slow, pass me then drive slow, don't use their turn signals and turn at the last possible second, and the people who are within 20 feet of a light that turns yellow and they stop instead of gunning it.

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What would you take to be an omen that the end of days is near? A nuclear bomb going overhead.

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Would you cut off a finger for a $100,000 dollars? My right pinky finger, for some reason, is shorter than the other and is currently serving no purpose, can't even type with it. So sure, I'd happily part with it for $100,000.

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How negative can you be? The only thing positive about me is my blood type.

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Am I really allowed to have my own opinion? Sure...right after I tell you what it is.

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Do you like people younger than you calling you by your name? it's better than saying "hey...old bitch"

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I saw this site in an artice"Myfreeimplants.com" Women sign up seeking money to pay for, well, you know. Guys sign up to chat and pay for it. Is this ridiculous or what? Bigger question...should there be a similar site for guys? I believe that site falls under the "there's a sucker born every minute" rule.

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Mind if I sit down? Only if you're done mowing my lawn and changing my oil.

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If by law you had to have a tombstone when you were buried, what would you ask to have written on it? Nothing...I don't plan on my family wasting the money on a rock with my name on it, nor do I plan on taking up 6 feet of space. I'm getting cremated and want to be dumped in the ocean, not put into some metal or stone container which my relatives will feel obligated to dust and move around with them.

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What and who gets on your nerves the most? Any pet peeves? Who: Anyone who talks about themselves incessantly; anyone who thinks they know something about Every subject that comes up in conversation; anyone who never shuts up and lets someone else speak, and of course..my ex. What: people making repetitive noise (finger tapping, foot tapping, pencil tapping, humming, etc.) My sisters who won't take the time to learn a few things about...

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If you took a bullet for the pope, would you be "holy"? No I wouldn't take a bullet for him. Don't all the catholics (I'm not) think he's going to heaven, and if so, wouldn't he want to get there as soon as possible?

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Who would you take a bullet for? My kids...possibly my best friend Ruth...but that's it.

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It's all over but the _____________? disposing of the body

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The store goes that theres a pot of gold under the rainbow, But if you couldn't have a pot of gold under the rainbow, What would you want? A pot of platinum!

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If you get there before I do, what will you do for me? Nothing...lateness is rude (unless you got a flat or something) in which case I'd order a couple of drinks for myself and wait patiently for 15 minutes or so.

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This guy caught his gf cheating on him w/her cousin. When confronted she said,"this is the 21st century people are more openminded and he should be too" what are your thoughts? First thought: ewwww Second thought: Dump her and go get a VD check

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What is the first thing that you thing of when reading this? According to some of Audiotron's answers...just out of curiosity...when are you not stoned? lol

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Would you donate your kidney to someone in your family if you knew it might hurt you in the long run? Only for my kids...no one else.

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What's the largest US city without a professional sports team? Austin, TX is the city with the largest population without any of the big 4 pro sport teams. Hampton Roads, VA is the largest metropolitan area without a pro team. Also on the list is Las Vegas, and Columbus Ohio.

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How do you feel about people that dress there dogs? If it's winter and needs a sweater...ok Otherwise...perhaps you should get a hobby?

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What is one place you would never want to live by? A landfill. A crack house. My mother's house. My pastor's house. My boss's house.

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I get the 634.00 a month but we are still married and he is a solider? What can I do to get the child support raised? How long has it been since you had a child-support determination? The timeframe varies by state, but you could request a re-determination of the amount of support. Your county child support office will do this for free. (In Ohio you can request it every 3 years). The Army (and I'm assuming the other services) requires soldiers to support their families. See this link:...

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Take a quote from a movie or a tv show and replace one word with "BANANA" It's not the men in my life that counts - it's the life in my banana. --Mae West, I'm No Angel

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Do you think that you are a very smart person? According to my Mensa-level IQ...yes According to some of the decisions I've made...no

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What exactly does "something the cat dragged in" look like? Bloody, muddy, and quite possibly dead & dismembered...at least that's what the things looked like that my cat has brought me...nice little presents he leaves for me on the porch.

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What circumstance in your life has classified as a "first and last time" incident? Losing my virginity

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Have you ever seen someone's kitchen and vowed to yourself that you'd never eat anything that person made? My ex mother-in-law...she kept her cat food bowl on the counter, the cat was always up there, and she would leave her faucet on a slow drip so the cat could get a drink.

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Want to find out how many people in the US have your name go to http://howmanyofme.com/search/ there are 0 people with my first name and their are 2,357 with my surname which makes it the 13,124th popular name in the US. There is one other person in the U.S. with my first and last name. Cool site, thanks!

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What's a "guy thing" you don't like? When they scratch their balls in public.

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What is the stupidest thing you have ever done? or seen someone do? Once, while driving an older car back from Florida to Ohio, a 1200 mile trip. When stopping to get gas, I decided to check the oil. It was low so I added a quart. Every time after that, I would check the oil again and it kept reading low, so with every fill-up, I would add a quart of oil. Going up Jellico Mountain, the car reached a top speed of 35. When I got home, I had my...

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Who thinks that Bindi Irwin (Crocodile Hunter's Daughter) is totally bonkers? I don't think SHE is bonkers...I think her mother and the other adults involved in pushing this child to be her father are bonkers.

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Whats the first thing that comes to your mind when you see that you have been Downrated? Mmmmm...that would imply that I really care what someone thinks of my opinions. Well, they're mine, and I stand behind them, whether they're of the factual nature or the sarcastic humorous kind. So, if someone doesn't like them....so what? It's not like I'm getting paid for the kudos I get.

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What animal would you NOT want to be if you were re-incarnated? A cow...unless I lived in India

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Does Tuesday have a "feel?" Yeah...it has the feel of "oh sh**...at least it's not Monday"

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Whats the first thing that comes to mind when I say, "Mike"? Mike and the Mechanics -- In the Living Years

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How often do you think about your thoughts? All the time...and I used to think they were f*cked up until I found this website and some of the questions people ask. Now I believe I'm normal (ok, so no not really).

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Are you shooting stars? Nope...my rifle isn't quite that powerful

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I'm a shy guy & lost a bet with my roommate Sarah. She said Kansas would win the NCAA title & I said if they did I'd take a vacation from work, give her all clothes & fabrics in my room & stay BARE NAKED for a full week! So here I am typing NUDE & blushin Sounds like you should've made a $5 bet instead

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I am engaged,but we argue (a little) almost every day-about little things.Now I am getting scared, any advice? You should probably attend pre-marriage counseling. Before you marry, you really need to discuss your thoughts on big things like who handles the finances, whether you want kids, do you agree on how to raise and discipline them, what (if any) religion they will be raised in, will you (or he) stay home with the kids or will you both work, the division of household duties. You need to have...

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If it was required by law for couples to strap each other to a lie detector and ask each other a question before getting married, what would you ask your mate? And, what would you hope your mate wouldn't ask you? I think there should be a minimum 30-day waiting period after you get a marriage license in order to get married. Six months would be even better. I think if people took more time to think it over, there would be fewer quickie marriages then divorces (like so many celebrities do). If you have to strap your s/o to a lie detector, then perhaps you don't trust them and shouldn't...

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I got child support for the two of three kids but it not enough to live 634.00 out of little over $4000.00 i dont have lights and gas and i cant afford to work.and i want to. So what can i file to get more money to live?(He has NO bills,Debt) child support is calculated on a percentage basis of the mother's income vs. the father's and a few other things. Why do you say you can't afford to work? Because of daycare? If you pay daycare, that is factored into child support and he would have to pay more child support to help you cover the costs. Have you looked into subsidized housing programs where you pay a...

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How to address a 22 year old college child that's living at home when they are disrepectful to mother with tone of voice. My answer would be: you live in my house, you respect my rules, don't ever think you can get an attitude with me (though disagreeing with me in a mature, respectable manner is ok). If you don't like my rules...seek other housing, immediately.

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Would you ever date outside of your race? All humans belong to the same race...regardless of what popular culture calls it, they are scientifically incorrect. Kingdom: Animalia Phylum: Chordata Class: Mammalia Order: Primates Family: Hominidae Genus: Homo Species: H. sapiens Subspecies: H. s. sapiens Would I ever date outside my race? No, not up for dogs, cats, monkeys, horses, etc. Would I ever date outside my...

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How do you react when you see a woman's armpit hair? If it's not spring or summer...I don't bother shaving

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Why do so many women trip when they find out their man is looking or watching porn? I dunno...I'd sit down beside him on the internet and show him a few of my faves...but that might freak him out

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What is the worst airport in the United States? After some research 1) New York's three major airports 2) Miami International 3) San Jose International 4) Los Angeles 5) Boston Logan International in that order

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If we woke up in bed together tomorrow morning, what three words would you say to me? Thanks....get out

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What would you like to be doing at the very moment of your death? Standing over my ex's body?

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What would be a really bad name for a funeral director? Barry M. Quick

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What would you do if you found a bag that has $1M in it? Hide it for a year...check to make sure there's no dye pack and that it's non-sequential

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What makes you feel peaceful? Xanax

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What is one thing you'd like to have or be that starts with C? I'll have cunnilingus

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If every human was given a Warning Label to their names, what would yours read? Warning: -- Can go from zero to bitch in .6 seconds -- Do not mix with alcohol -- Abuse will have dire consequences -- Objects less than 8 inches should not be inserted

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If you really were what you eat... what would you most likely be? A pepperoni and banana pepper pizza?

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Be creative. If you were homeless and had to stand on a street corner with a cardboard sign, what would you write? Happy Ending...$500...maybe that's a little too cheap?

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What's worse cleaning up poop or puke? Puke...makes me puke...I'll clean the poop. Plus it usually doesn't splatter over such a large area.

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Apple crisp, peach cobbler or strawberry shortcake? Summer--strawberry shortcake Winter--peach cobbler

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Which is better?Pipe Vs. Bong? Well...a pipe is smaller and easier to carry, and therefore will probably get more use. But a bong takes the edge off and is smoother. So I guess it depends on your goal.

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Why is Tennessee called the volunteer state? Tennessee has had several nicknames, but the most popular is “The Volunteer State.” The nickname originated during the War of 1812, in which the volunteer soldiers from Tennessee, serving under Gen. Andrew Jackson, displayed marked valor in the Battle of New Orleans.

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When I say Dayton, Ohio what comes to your mind? My birthplace, a crappy school system, too high property taxes, a slow court system, and double the national average crime rate.

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What is the city of cleveland like Don't know about the city itself ... but I know they only have about a 44% high school graduation rate...pretty bad. It's like the 5th worst in the nation. http://www.usatoday.com/news/education/2006-06-20-dropout-rates_x.htm

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Where does this last screw go? In my ex's temple?

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Would you drive a hot pink car if it were free? (can't change color) If it were a McLaren, an Enzo, or a Lamborghini...heck yes. Probably yes if it were a Mustang GT (new), a '68 Camaro or 55 T-bird too.

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What would you do, if your son/daughter was shot by his teacher with a stun gun? Uh...why did the teacher have a stun gun at school? Unless my kid were coming at him/her with a gun or a knife, I'd have to open up a can o'whoopass on the teacher.

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Would you or do you teach your children to "hit back" or "turn the other cheek"? We've told ours that they are to Never hit first, but if someone else hits them first, then by all means you fight back. Of course schools now have this "zero tolerance" policy wherein both kids would be tossed out of school, which I think is crap. But I'm not going to teach my kids it is ok to let someone else hit them or otherwise bully them.

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A friends son picked on my daughter @ a party,name call.hitting-and dragging her through the yard he is 13 she is 10- she has enough to deal with since her father is in rehab-he has spent most of her life in Iraq. Help, I can't even think anymore! Talk to the other kid's parent(s) and tell them if they don't discipline him, you're going to press assault charges against him. As an alternative, you could find a 14 year old and pay him to kick the 13 year old's behind to see how he likes it.

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What do you do when your teen calls you ugly names and you tell them it hurts but they say they are just jokeing is it your problem or thiers? My kid has every right to disagree with my decisions (which she can keep to herself), but disrespecting me by calling me names? She did it once, and I told her that was her one free pass. The next time, she'd be taking a trip to the dentist to see what he could do about her missing teeth.

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I have been hit, bit and pinched by a 6 year old, is it ok to feel like I am going to snap, or should I let it go because he is 6 (this is a kid I sit)? I would either wear his ass out or tell his mom I'm not watching him anymore.

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My neighbor's 2 1/2 yr. old daughter threw a tantrum and bit her mother's hand and the mother bit her daughter's hand back? She said it teaches the child not to do bite anyone. Was the mother correct in her discipline? I did that to my daughter when she was that age. My mom told me I was being mean, but it sure did fix the problem.

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What would you say to a parent that won't buy the kid a candy bar? Uh...they need to be taught that they don't get everything they want...unless they're like Oprah or Bill Gates.

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How do i connect with my 5 year old step daughter.......she has behaviour problems....i never seem to be able to get through to her!!!!!!!!!!!!HELP!!!!!!!!!! I would try to take her out, just the two of you, and do some one-on-one things together...take her to get her nails done (little girls love feeling all grown up), take her to a kids museum...do some things to try to spend quality time with her just the two of you and maybe she'll start behaving better and begin to trust and let you in.

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What would you do if your underaged daughter's bf proposed to her? (and you liked the boy and his parents of course) Tell them that after they both finish college, if they still feel the same way toward each other, they'll have your full support. Otherwise...no way.

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Iam 20 years old i live with my gram in a one bedroom apartment iam pregnant n i dont think iam ready for this baby i dont think i would give a good enough life what should i do i dont have the fund to raise a baby n honestly i dont really want it Yes...I think adoption is sometimes the best thing a parent can do for their child. It would go to someone who really wants a child, and given the cost of adoption, they can probably provide for it much better than you can. It's better than keeping it, not being able to provide for it, not being a good parent, and possibly resenting it and taking it out on the child later on.

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Can a man, who I am not involved with, adopt my daughter or do we have to be involved for him to be able to adopt her? I live in Ohio, and had to be married to my husband for a year before he was allowed to adopt my daughter. Think carefully before you do this, he can sue for full custody.

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My 2 year old son is very jealous of anyone who tries to hug me, sit next to me, etc. How can I make him understand that he has to share me? I think that is very usual for that age.

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Just out of curiosity, do you think that it is reasonable that a mother makes her 14-year old daughter turn off the tv at 10:00 pm sharp on the week nights? I have a 14 year old daughter. After 9 p.m. -- no incoming our outgoing phone calls and she needs to be in her room. Lights out at 10.

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Are you afraid of being along when your kids move out? Nope. I'm planning on selling my house, buying an RV, and finally travelling. Plus, this plan ensures they don't think they can move back home at any time after they are grown.

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What is one piece of advice you'd give to parents whose son is entering his teen years? Make sure you tell him "don't be silly, wrap you're willy"

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My 13 year old son has just been brought home by the police and cautioned for shoplifting. What would be the best way to punish him, caning his bare backside with willlow or making him survive on water alone for two days? I'd go with the cane...though my dad used a belt and my mom a switch, which I had to go get myself.

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If you saw a parent spanking a small child on his/her butt in a store, would you intervene? Would you call the police? What if the child was screaming and struggling? My daughter had temper tantrums when she was small for a good 2 years. I would bend down and whisper in her ear "do you need a trip to the bathroom?". If that didn't work, then she got a trip to the bathroom, which is where I spanked her because I didn't want to hear any crap from any ignorant people who either don't believe in spankings, or didn't know the...

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Is it wrong to ask your daughter's "suitor" to write his name on a rifle cartridge so you "have a bullet with his name on it?" I don't think so. Give me your best "shot" if you disagree. (Dad of 4 girls, so be careful!) That may be a little extreme, but I wouldn't hesitate to be cleaning my guns and have my targets from the practice range posted prominently near the front door.

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Is it okay to feel like crying when your child says "I hate you" for the first time, even though you know they don't mean it? I would try not to take it to heart...we all hear it at some point I think. My daughter is 14 and very strong-willed, stubborn and opinionated (just like her mother) so we frequently but heads.

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Do you think some people should not have children? I'm a substitute teacher, and after some of the kids I've seen...I think there should be mandatory sterilization for some people.

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We have a friend, 25, lately his mom is calling us complaing( i know his from before)that she is working three jobs to make ends meet, he lives with her but wont contribute. she is afraid to kick him out? what should she do? Go file the paperwork to have him legally evicted. Only way that would happen with me is if my kid were in college full-time. Otherwise...no way. My 37 year old sister still lives with my mother, has a drug habbit and steals from her. It pisses me off that my mom won't kick her to the curb.

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Are you a better mother/father to your children than your parents were to you? Hell yes. My kids are better dressed, go to better schools, I'm involved in their school lives, communicate with their teachers on a regular basis. I talk to them and listen to them. We go to museums, movies, the park, sporting events, etc. together. I don't go out drinking, stay gone all weekend, and get DUI's (as my parents did). I don't physically abuse my kids (as...

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How much quality time should parents spend with their kids a week? As much as you possibly can. When they are teens, they'll have their own things they want to do, plus there'll be lots of times you may not get along then. Spend as much time as you can with them now. Talk to them and listen to them. I try to think, if this were my last day on earth, what would their last memory of me be? Me saying, I'll play with you later or us all...

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As a single parent, how do you decide whether or not to date again? I find myself wanting to date (occasionally), but not wanting to run a bunch of men through my children's lives. what do you think? My ex moved out in 2001 when our kids were 2 & 7. We divorced in 2002. I have never dated anyone since. I feel I made such a horrendous choice in a spouse and don't want to repeat my mistake. I also don't want to expose my kids to anyone else. I can wait until they are grown. Also, after my parents divorced when I was a child, sometimes it seemed like they installed...

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How old were you when you became a parent? 26 & 31

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How do i take my kids out of state without biological father knowing Ooohhh...not recommended. I many states you can be charged with parental kidnapping if move out of state with the child/children, even in case of abuse. You'd have to get an ok from the court for that.

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What are your thoughts on a father having naked baths with his five year old daughter? I think a parent of either gender with a child of either gender should not be bathing or showering with a 5 year old. When my kids were babies (under 2), a couple of times I took them into the shower with me to save time. But 99.9% of the time, I sat outside the tub and handed them toys or washed their hair and that was it. I told/taught them how to dry their own private parts by age 4. I...

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Do you think it is right to force a child to sit there and finish everything on their plate? No, they shouldn't be forced to eat everything on their plate. However, I have an 8 year old son who is an extremely picky eater and if he had his way, would live on cheese pizza and chicken nuggets. I do make him try one bite of everything, but I don't force him to finish everything.

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I saw my friend's boyfriend hit her and broke her nose..then I jumped in and beat the boyfriend up.. was I wrong for this? Hell no you weren't wrong...you did the right thing. Maybe next time he'll think twice before he does something so ignorant...if not, hopefully there's someone like you around to offer correction to his way of thinking, so to speak.

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What are your rules when it comes to declaring someone a "true" or "good" friend? A good friend will bail you out of jail...a true friend will be sitting beside you laughing about it.

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What is the one quality of the person you have a crush on have that attracts you? His intelligence

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Aren't biracial babies beautiful I think so...they seem to get the best of both worlds so to speak...look at Halle Barry and Whitney Houston.

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What is your favorite Ed Harris Movie? Eye For An Eye

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What can a woman do that a man can't? What can a man do that a woman can't? Women--give birth and feed them Men--pee standing

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Boxers or briefs? 1) Boxer briefs 2) Boxers Speedos and male thongs should be outlawed.

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Women, what do you find least attractive in men that isn't a physical trait? Dishonesty, abusiveness, over-inflated ego, no sense of humor

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What are a man's LEAST two favorite words? -- too small -- mom's visiting -- you're fired

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Who has the most annoying voice on television? Gilbert Gottfried...hands down

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How many more seasons will American Idol still be airing? Hopefully not many.

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Does anyone find it interesting that there were NUMEROUS "Air Force" commercials during a recent airing of a "9/11 Conspiracy(s)" program on The History Channel? Commercials are geared to the anticipated viewing audience of the show. You'll notice more toy commercials during cartoons, more Viagra and beer commercials during football/b-ball, etc., more feminine products and diaper commercials during soap operas, more stockbroker/money investment type commercials during CNN shows. I used to work for a marketing company and one of our jobs was to...

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Do you watch BIG BROTHER?? Who is your favourite? and who do you hate??? who do you hope will win? Natalie gets on my last nerve...I can't stand a whiny woman (gives the rest of us a bad name). I hope Adam wins..he seems like a good guy. All time favorite: Evil Dick

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Which celebrity would make the worst president? Dennis Rodman or Tom Cruise or Rosie O'Donnell

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Why do people care so much about the lives of people they do not know, ie celebirity lives? I don't really give two sh**s about what celebrities are doing, who they marry, when they divorce, how many kids they have, what they got arrested for. About the only thing I care to hear about celebrities is when they use their celebrity/money for some good purpose to help elevate the plight of others (i.e. New Orleans, Aids, building new schools, etc.)

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What's your favorite Johnny Cash song? Older: A Boy Named Sue Newer: Hurt

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What is the weirdest thing you have used to masturbate with? myself

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Who performed the greatest cunnalingus you personally ever had or personally heard of and what happened to that relationship? Hate to say it...but my ex-husband was a Master Cunnilinguist...which more than compensated for his other "shortcoming"

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Have you ever had sex with someone that your sibling had sex with? Hell no...one sister is a lesbian and the other is/was a whore...the actual "that'll cost ya $20" kinda whore

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Do you believe giving head is degrading? or it is fun? No...it's not degrading...but I don't like the guy grabbing me by the hair trying to steer me....otherwise I find it highly enjoyable...and so does he

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Ladies how many guys have you had in 1 night??? how? Two guys I was dating way back when...one in the afternoon...one that night...probably doesn't help that they were best friends of each other

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Is it bad if I don't go down on my partner but he goes down on me? Ever heard the term "turn about is fair play" or "you get what you give"?

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Is there any way i could be a lesbian traped in a male body? If you were a lesbian trapped in a male's body...does that mean you want to have your parts lopped off so you could wear a strap on?

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This funny but sad thing happened today' this guy was hooking up his satilite dish an did'nt have a drill to make a hole through the wall' to run the cable ''so he gets his 22 rifle an shoots a hole through the wall ''an kills his wife ! crazy huh? I went with an ex-boyfriend long ago to stay a week in Arkansas to visit his mother...she told me this joke... Why do Arkies hate having the bright lights switch on the steering wheel....cause they keep getting their foot caught in the steering wheel... If that's an indication....then, uh, yeah...I can see the mentality in your statement about putting the whole in the wall.

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Is it wronge to take your cousins wife an keep her for three weeks an have sex with her everyday just to piss him off? Ok...you're an Arkie so I understand that cousin pokin' is the thing to do there...is that a habit? could this lead to your feeling of a lack of love...

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Why does it taste so good? Because after a long hot shower and shave...I put a little honey on it in anticipation of your visit.

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What is the worst way to have sex? ummmm....alone?

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What are you thoughts on the people who say that we don't owe african americans anything anymore because what happened to them happened very long ago and they should get over it? No intention of being disrespectful of their history...but I didn't do it and it isn't happening now, sooo...um ...get over it and move on?

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Whats the best theme park to visit in Orlando, Florida? Hands down: Epcot

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What is the worst theme park you have been to? Fantasy Farm in Ohio...closed eons ago

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What is your favorite Theme Park Resturaunt? I like the Rainforest Cafe...they're not just in theme parks...but they are kinds pricey for what they have

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What is the worst theme park you have been to? I grew up on all the coasters at Kings Island...so when I went to Busch Gardens in FL...I kinda thought it blew

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What is your favorite roller coaster? Anyone been to Kings Island to ride The Beast?

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I'm listening to 'joe walsh' greatest hits .... who are you listening to? Joe Walsh: The Confessor

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Is there any famous musician/singer who you were really sad from them passing away? Stevie Ray Vaughan

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Who did u always think was better?metallica or megadeth. Metallica....who is this megadeath of which you speak...j/k

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How valuable is laughter to you in your life? Uhhh...let's just say I'd die without it. It's what helps me through the bullsh** that happens in every day life. I might even have to choose laughter over chocolate, but that's a rough call.

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Pink floyd's greatest song ever. Wish You Were Here....followed by...Comfortably Numb

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In the U2 song "Where the Streets Have No Name," to what place are they referring? From Wiki: The song is interpreted in different ways; a common interpretation of the lyrics is that it refers to the streets of Belfast, Northern Ireland, where a person's religion is evident by the street they live on. In a 1987 interview, Bono said of the song: "Where the Streets Have No Name is more like the U2 of old than any of the other songs on the LP, because...

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Who do you like better, The Doors or 3 Doors Down? After checking "My Music" folder...I notice I have zero songs from The Doors and 4 from 3 Doors Down...So I'm going to have to vote 3 Doors Down...never could stand The Doors...even back "in the day"

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Which "Green Day" album has the song "Time Of Your Life on it"? "Time of Your Life" -- real title is "Good Riddance" and it is on both Nimrod and International Superhits

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What is one of your favorite songs from the 1980's? Either G-N-R "I Used To Love Her (But I Had to Kill Her) or Whitesnake "Slide It In"

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What is Heart's best song? Either "Magic Man" or "All I Wanna Do Is Make Love to You"

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What is death metal? Death metal is an extreme heavy metal subgenre. The genre is typically characterized by the use of heavily-distorted guitars, harsh vocals that are low-pitched and/or growled, morbid lyrics, exceptionally fast-paced rhythms and melodies, frequent blast beats on drums, and complex song structures with multiple tempo changes. IMHO: Sucks

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Who was the best 'Hair Band' ever? Scorpions

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What is your favorite Ray Price song? (if you even know who Ray Price is) Heartaches by the Number and For the Good Times

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What act or music makes you feel most patriotic? Toby Keith: 1) Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue and 2) American Soldier

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What is Queen's song Bohemian Rhapsody about? Gotten from Wiki: There Queen states that "Bohemian Rhapsody" is about a young man who has accidentally killed someone and, like Faust, sold his soul to the devil. On the night before his execution he calls for God in Arabic, "Bismillah" (Basmala), and with the help of angels regains his soul from Shaitan.

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What films have you seen that you just had to have the soundtrack for? Pay It Forward

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What would be a worst name for Michael Jackson? Cracker?

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Do you like AC/DC's Hells Bells? I love that song

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Do you know who MSI (Mindless Self Indulgence) is? It's so hard to find other fans out there. Unfortunely yes...I have a 14 yr old daughter and she LOVES them

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What is your most, absaloute favourite Greenday song?(my on is Holiday) Wake Me Up When September Ends

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What genre of music would be torture for you to listen to for an hour? Opera

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What is your favorite Reba McEntire song? I have like 4: Fancy The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia The Christmas Song She Thinks His Name Was John

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What is your favorite Vince Gill song? Mine is "Go Rest High on That Mountain"

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What is your favorite song from any of Trace Adkins albums? It's a tie between Honky Tonk Badonkadonk and Chrome...he is so hot!

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I bet I can guess what type of person you are based on what your favorite movie is. Wanna try? *Update Jan 2009--sorry, I can't reply to everyone anymore* Silence of the Lambs

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What is your favorite Dolly Parton song? Old Flames Can't Hold A Candle To You

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Have you ever been kicked out of a ( bar,restraunt,place of business) And what the heck were you doing? I was meeting my boyfriend at a bar and had on a mini-skirt and some drunk made a lewd comment about me and I heard him and it went downhill from there. The bar owner barred me from her bar, saying I started it by wearing the skirt in the 1st place. Do what??

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Have you ever had anything confiscated and if yes what was it? Yes...in 9th grade I had purchased some herb. Turned out it really was some herb...oregano.

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Have you ever touched, something you were told not to touch? Yes...but I know he really wanted me to.

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Have you ever been in a fight? Yes...with both sisters many times, and once with my dad. He was drunk and going to beat me anyway, so that time I hit him back. Funny though, when the cops showed up, he was bleeding and I wasn't. His girlfriend sat there the whole time watching. Then there were those two girls in jr. high...got tossed out of school for a couple days those times.

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Have you ever wondered how the life of your loved ones is going to be like when you are gone? Yes..I pray all the time that nothing will happen to me before both my kids graduate high school.

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Have you ever been tied up? No...I prefer to do the tying.

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Have you ever had to do the right thing, and the people you care about will not understand? Yes...after my dad had gotten 6 DUI's and continued to drink and drive (w/no license)...I began reporting him. He would be so drunk he'd literally fall out of the car when he got home. My family was so pissed they wouldn't speak to me. I figured I was probably saving someone's life, including his.

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Have you ever gone out in public in your pajamas? No...and it drives me crazy when I see people (mostly women) doing that!!!!!

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Have you ever been hit in the face with your own boob? No...jogging is not my favorite pasttime.

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Have you ever been shot /stabbed? what did it feel like? Nope...I'm the odd one out in my family. My baby sister stabbed my middle sister in the arm when they were teens arguing over the stereo. My dad shot himself when I was about 8, but it went straight through and he was fine (physically). My mom shot my dad when I was 10 after he beat her. (He lived and the bullet is still in him.) My dad was stabbed in the back in a bar fight. ...

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Has anyone ever lived close to a murderer or someone who has committed a hideous crime? Yes...and dad gets out of prison this summer. He shot and killed a good friend of his and will only serve 4 years in prison for it (which I happen to think is bullsh**)

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Have you ever argued with an idiot and then realized you're just arguing with an idiot and your point will not be received? Oh...you've met my ex?

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Do you just all of a sudden start singing that Miley Cyrus song? And just can't stop doing it? If I knew a Miley Cyrus song, I'd have to shoot myself.

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Do you think needing a "mental health" day is a legitimate reason to call in sick to work? Absolutely. I worked at one place and called in "sick" one day. The next day, my boss must've known I wasn't "sick" because he flat out said to me "everyone needs a mental health day now and then". I just started laughing and didn't even try to deny it.

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WHAT TIME IS IT? 4:20

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What would you do if someone started shooting people in a public place and you were next? Pray that my kids weren't with me and that I had the safety off my gun.

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If you had children, what would you do if a convicted child molester lived beside you? I don't believe child molesters ever become "reformed". I'd opt for burning his/her house down (hopefully with them in it).

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Did you ever sneek out when you were a kid? If so, how often? Yes...I think it was twice before I was caught. My mom woke up in the middle of the night, got my little sister out of the bed and came driving around looking for me. My best friend and I were a couple blocks away out walking...when we saw headlights we ducked down behind a car. The car stopped and my little sister jumped out of the car and came and found us and started pointing, jumping up...

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What are some real names that you've heard that just made you laugh? I know a guy named Richard Rash (Dick Rash) and a guy named Gary B. Nice Dick Trickle -- Race car driver and Ob/Gyn Dr. -- Dr. Massengil

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Can I have your number? 138

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Would you rather be fat with no body odour or be skinny and have really bad body odour? Does it matter? Either way you're probably not going to get laid.

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Is he that hesitates truly lost? If he hesitates off the starting line, he is truly last.

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Have you ever been indecisive about feeling indecisive? I'm a procrastinator...can I answer this later?

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Which do you prefer a flame thrower or AK47? A flame thrower...if I'm trying to clean up a crime scene. An AK if I'm trying to create one.

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What's the worst thing one of your siblings ever did to you? I was 14...had a major crush on a guy and had made out with him a couple of times...and of course had written oodles about it in my diary. My 10 year old sister locked herself in her bedroom, opened her bedroom window and began reading aloud from my diary for every neighborhood kid to hear.

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Would you ever get yourself one of those hairless cats? Jeez...someone from the ex's side of the family tried to give us one of those as a wedding present. When I told him mother "no thanks" she was like "that's a $2000 dollar cat". Well...how about the money instead? Maybe that's why she never liked me?

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CATS or MEN? (see answers for cats!) Back hair on cats looks better. Cats keep their opinions to themselves. Cats don't criticize your mother. Cats never question how much you're eating. Cats never claim they know how to fix larger appliances. Cats understand the importance of beauty sleep. Cats are happy to let you drive. Cats always look good first thing in the morning. One good purr can be...

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Cats are responsible for all the evils of the world. Hitler got the idea to invade Poland from a talking cat. Do you trust them? And thankfully, a smarter cat told Hitler to off himself and he listened to that one too.

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Does a cat really need a name since they never answer when you call them? My cats know their names. Besides you need something to put on their headstone when they die besides "cat", "the black one", or "Here lies no name"

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Should i kill my cat cause she keeps scratching the furniture or is there a better way of stopping her ..........first part was only a joke for the time being? I had a cat who would jump on the counter and knock stuff off after everyone went to bed at night. Well, I can't stand a cat on a counter (think it's dirty) and I didn't feel like cleaning up whatever he knocked on the floor....so, I started putting masking tape (laying with the sticky side up) on the counters before I went to bed. Maybe you could try that if buying the...

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My male cat (1 yr old) walks up to my female cat (5 yrs old), and she'll nicely wash his face for a bit, and the wack up upside the head. She doesn't use her claws on him, but it actually makes a loud THUMP... what is this about? LOL...my cats did this to...I think it's their version of showing they like each other and then her saying, hey, move, you're blocking my sunlight.

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Cat owners: How much does your cat weigh? Zoe is about 18 pounds...her nickname is Budda.

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Is your cat smelly? My cat Zoe doesn't smell bad. Her problem is that she has really long hair and gets the occasional dingleberry, so I have to trim her hair in the rear...not a fun job...grosses my kids out when I do it.

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What is the best way to wash a cat? Run the water first, have towels handy, wear thick clothing that is ok getting soaked, pull your hair back in a pony tail (if necessary), wear safety goggles, and for gosh sakes, have plenty of band-aids and neosporin on hand for when you are done. Out of the 3 cats I've had as an adult, only one would not put up a fuss when bathed, and he even let me dry him with a hair dryer!

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Our beloved ABer Raff lost her cat tonight. Will you give her support? Most of us know what it's like to have to let a loved pet go. I am so sorry for your loss. I just had to have my favorite cat Sammy Samson put to sleep 5 days ago. I haven't slept since and I lied to my kids about where he went because I couldn't break their hearts as they just lost one of their grandma's a couple of months ago.

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What is it about bathrooms that so fascinates a cat? LMAO...this is a funny question...but so true. Our cat Zoe is a bit of a b*tch and doesn't like to be petted a lot, but sit on the toilet and she comes running, jumps onto the side of the tub, and meows until you pet her.

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When thinking about the 1980's what is the first thing that comes to mind to you? Being a teen big hair on the guys and girls going to concerts (from Journey to Ozzy) parachute pants Jordache, Vanderbilt and Calvin Klein jeans (skin tight) Arcades (Pac-man, Galaga, Centipede, Rally-X) 8-bit Nintendo and the Legend of Zelda Sayings like "cool beans" and "to the max" and "psyche" Miami Vice DeLoreans Boom Boxes and Walkmans Fast Times...

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If God had a hotline, what would be the waiting music while you are on hold? "Highway To Hell" by AC/DC?

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What are your thoughts on the phrase "I now pronounce you Man and Wife"? Why wouldn't it be "Husband and Wife"? I think it's old-fashioned, and redundant. I mean, wasn't he pronounced male when he was born? When I got married I told the minister to use the "husband and wife" version. The "man and wife" version offends me, like I'm some kind of sidekick, and not an equal.

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What does the saying "Bogarted" mean? I use it, my friend do...none of us knows what it means! LOL! From the Urban Dictionary: (slang verb) To keep something all for oneself, thus depriving anyone else of having any. A slang term derived from the last name of famous actor Humphrey Bogart because he often kept a cigarette in the corner of his mouth, seemingly never actually drawing on it or smoking it. Often used with weed or joints but can be applied to anything. see:...

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If you could somehow see the future and see the kids you are destined to produce and they turned out to be beautiful and successful parts of society but it meant you had to sleep with the last person you would ever touch would you? A small part of me says "yes, in a heartbeat". The majority of me says "my kids are beautiful and they will be successful parts of society due to their lineage and upbringing, so I don't have to compromise myself to ensure their success in society."

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I been going out with my boyfriend for 4 months. But his ex is trying to get in between.. she been putting old pictures of them together on my space like they going out. I don't know what to do?...he already told her to stop that, but she keep doing it. When you're with someone, you either trust them, or you don't. Do you trust him? If so, then ignore her...she's either delusional, or trying to get a rise out of one of you. If you don't trust him, then you shouldn't be with him.

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Who thinks im sexy Why do you give a Sh** what others think? Do YOU think you're sexy? If you do...then others probably will too. Similarly, if you don't, then others will probably think so too.

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How do lonely, neglected housewives pass the time? Not to be offensive, but .... If you have kids...you should be busy. If you don't...why are you a housewife and don't at least have a job, or better yet, your own career?

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What does sending out an SOS mean? What do the letters stand for? It replaced the original distress call in morse code which was "CQD". It was replaced because of it's ease of use and unmistakable code. It doesn't stand for anything, per se, meaning the SOS isn't an acronym for some particular set of words. For the whole history, see: http://www.boatsafe.com/nauticalknowhow/060199tip6.htm

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Did you hear about the MAN that has become pregnant with a child? Do you think this is abnormal and disgusting, or do you view it as being a step forward in science? [please see answer for link to short video] It isn't a "real" man. It's a woman who had her boobs removed...took testosterone shots, got her birth certificate changed from female to male, but still had all the other female equipment. He/She and her wife were on Oprah about a week ago. I don't consider that as a man being pregnant, since she was born female and still has all the female parts to carry a baby...

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There's a story of the marine they have been trying to catch, which they caught in Mexico today. Mexican authorities would only give him back to the U.S. if we promised to not give him the death penalty. Why is Mexico is able to request this? In 1978 the U.S. signed an Extradition Treaty with Mexico. Mexico has no death penalty, and apparently part of the Treaty provided that it would extradite people back to the U.S. who were fleeing prosecution, provided the U.S. did not seek the death penalty against them. If you want the read the entire thing, see the following link:...

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Whats the first thing that comes to mind when I say, "Are you crazy!?" Have you been talking to my psychiatrist????

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What would be your first thought if you found out Dr. Phil was your new neighbor? My 1st thought would be "yeah...I must've hit the lottery to be able to afford that house". As far as having him as a neighbor...who cares...I mean, how often is he home? As long as I don't see him in a speedo laying out by the pool.

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What is your favourite "Deep Thoughts With Jack Handy" quote? "I hope that someday we will be able to put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people".

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If you can slap someone through the television... who would you slap? The producers of Extra! and Entertainment Tonight who actually believe I care to hear any more, ever, about Paris Hilton, Britney Spears or Lindsey Lohan.

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Do you feel bad for American Idol contestants when the judges sit and laugh at them? I feel bad for them in that they didn't have a friend who was honest enough with them to sit them down and say "look, I've gotta be honest with you, you can't sing" before they went on national tv.

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Does anyone remember "Beat the Clock," "To Tell the Truth," or "Truth or Consequences"? Do you miss an old, fun game show? I miss "The Newlyweds"

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What is the first TV show you remember watching as a child? Romper Room

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What is your opinion on Dateline NBC to Catch a Predator? I love that show and am happy about every perv they catch. I am just astonished at what some of these guys do for a living, i.e. a cop, a preacher, a teacher. I am was also shocked when they caught the same guy twice. What an idiot. They all deserve castration.

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What is your favourite television programme? Survivor

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If you could cancel one TV show, what would it be? Jerry Springer

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What is your favorite old-time TV commercial? Not sure this qualifies as old-time...but the Budweiser Beer Frogs

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In your opinion, what is the most wholesome, clean show that's ever been on television, (one the whole family would watch, not just a children's show)? Touched By An Angel

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Ladies...do you enjoy giving your significant other oral sex? Why or why not? I love doing it. I enjoy the being in control aspect of it. I enjoy being able to make him happy. If you're really good at it, it's a great little bargaining tool for getting honey-do's done. It's easy to perform almost anywhere. And, it makes me really horny.

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How come my left testical hangs lower than my right one? I actually saw this question on Oprah...that guy Dr. Oz answered it. I don't remember why he said it happens, but apparently it happens to all guys and is very normal, as is them being slightly differently sized.

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What's the first thing that comes to mind when I say "adjustable rate mortgage"? Also known as bait-and-switch

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What the first thing that comes to mind when you see a full moon? Depends on whose it is...is it Brad Pitt's or Rosie O'Donnell's?

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Do women think men are rich when they see them pull up in a mclaren? and what would go through their mind? Suh-weeeet!!! Wonder if he'd let me take that for a quick spin? If he's driving a half million dollar car, I'd say he's not living in the projects.

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Two aliens observe Earth and one says to the other...? This reminds me of the Jerry Springer Show

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What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear the word divorce? Expensive...followed closely by lengthy and time-consuming

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Whats the first thing that comes to mind when I say, "Legend"? Stevie Ray Vaughan

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When growing up or to this day, what is your favorite cartoon? Hekyll & Jekyll

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What are 3 things you can't do without? My kids, my computer, and Diet Dr. Pepper

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What word comes to mind when you think of your ex? Only one word....I'll have to go with "narcissist"

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What's the first thing that comes to mind when I say "adjustable rate mortgage"? In a few months, someone is going to get screwed

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What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear "Easter?" Carlos Mencia saying "Jesus is coming...quick...hide the eggs"

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What first comes to mind when you see a damn fool question like this? 2 a.m. boredom?

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What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear 'derivative'? I get nightmares from that word...college calculus class...ewww

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Can you name something that is essential and the color red? my teen daughter's period...on time, every time

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When I say "Americana", what is the first food that comes to mind? An amusement park in Ohio we went to when I was little...it's closed now.

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What comes first to mind when I say "free..."? there's no such thing

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What comes to your mind when say 7? Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.

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What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word 'hillbilly'? oh god...another family re-union

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What the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word 'coke'? Snort....coke...what coke?

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Whats the first thing that comes to mind when I say loaded? My Glock

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What's the first thing to come to mind after having sex? How long will it take him to be ready for another go?

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What comes to your mind when I say "Paris"? Thanks to media over-saturation....Hilton Ho

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What is the first thing you think of when you hear the word "munchies"? Fruity Pebbles...dry and right out of the box

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So how DO you fit a square peg in a round hole? Make sure that the measurement of the diagonal width of the square peg is less than twice the radius of the circle...that should do it.

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Can you catch me off guard by saying something completely random? I wish I could have a penis for a day so I could find out what it's like to pee standing up, what sex was like for a guy...and oh by the way, I think my areolas are too big.

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Could you be friends with someone who was blatantly racist or sexist? No. That is a sign of ignorance and I can't stand ignorant people.

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Could you ever forgive someone who physically abused you? Well, after he went to sleep I'd beat his ass with a baseball bat. When he woke up in the hospital, I'd ask him if he could forgive me and maybe we'd go from there. Seriously though, no, that's a one-strike and you're out rule with me.

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Has anyone ever walked in on your and your lover while you were having sex? Who was it? Yes...my 5 year old daughter...she started crying saying "you're just doing that so I can't"....I was like doing what honey (of course we'd stopped then) and she said to my husband "you're just hugging mommy so I can't" It was mortifying then, but very funny now. Fortunately she has no memory of it.

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What are some reasons a man in his early 30's can't get his penis hard? First of all, this happens to all guys at some time or other. But if it is a recurring problem, he should probably go see a doctor for a check-up. Physical problems which can cause this include: diabetes, disorders of the kidneys, liver, or circulatory system, heart conditions, and hypogonadism (low testosterone production). Otherwise, it could be a problem in the relationship,...

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What is hotter, a white, blue or red flame? BLUE is hottest. See: http://www.coolquiz.com/trivia/explain/docs/flame.asp http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_color_of_flame_has_the_hottest_temperature http://webexhibits.org/causesofcolor/3B.html

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What do the colors on the barber's pole stand for? See Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barber's_pole

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I just interviewed for a great position. During the meeting I was asked to come back for another interview next week. I am all about writing thank you letters. Should I wait until after the second interview to write one? No. You should write it before then. It will show your continuing interest in the position/company and will also show class. And it may be that extra little something that puts you above the others who are also vying for the same position.

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I'm 16 weeks pregnant can i go find out the sex of the baby,how acurate will it be? 20 weeks is the usual timeframe for an accurate determination of a fetus' gender. Of course, anytime you get an ultrasound, it depends on how the baby is laying and whether or not they can get a good picture of the area. My sister is 21 weeks pregnant, and she had her ultrasound done at 18 weeks and there are 2 different pics with an arrow pointing out that he's a he.

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Do you think that all child sexual abusers should go to prison? Prison? No. Why should the general public support them for the rest of their lives? I think they should be shot, and if it were my child involved, I'd see to it personally.

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Why are guys so perverted? Define perverted. I'm a female who fantasizes about sex, likes a variety of positions, enjoys giving and receiving oral, enjoys having sex in unusual locations. To me perverted is anything involving animals, children, or scat. Just about everything else is fine to try at least once.

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If women were fish, what would you say is the best bait to use? A large worm

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Does stealing another woman's husband make you a WHORE? No. It makes him a cheating asshole and her an ignorant bitch with no morals. Ignorant, because if she thinks that someone who was unfaithful to another with her is going to then be faithful to her....well, that's just ignorant.

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My husband is physically and emotionally abusive to me. We have kids and they do not want me to leave him. He does the abuse in front of them sometimes. Is leaving him wrong or right. Iwant what is best for my children but i do not like the abuse. My dad was extremely abusive to my mom...many beatings, black eyes, broken bones. She should have left him way sooner than she did. Staying with him is bad for you and bad for your kids. You're teaching them that it's ok to be someone's doormat. If he hasn't already, sooner or later he will start abusing them too. Run, don't walk, to the best attorney you can...

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My boyfriend calls me names like bitch,slut,whore,ugly,fat,skank,smelly,tramp,etc.But he says that he is just joking and he doesnt mean it.Well I dont take it as a joke,and I take very seriously.Do you think that Im overreacting?Would you take it as joke? It's not a joke. Dump the sorry bastard.

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Can you describe your father in one word? Asshole...but there are many others: addict, abusive, insensitive, prick, murderer, drunk

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4 words you never want to hear? Mom...my period's late

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How can i get over my fear of oral sex? Try putting something on it like honey, cool whip, chocolate sauce (though this can get messy)....then slowly lick it all off. The head is the most sensitive part, and deep throating is an acquired skill that requires regular practice. If you can get really good at it, it's a wonderful bargaining chip for getting things you want.

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Could you remain celibate for a year? Satan (my ex) and I divorced in 2002 and I've been celibate ever since. Every time I even begin to entertain the notion of dating, I just think of my ex, then remember "oh yeah...I sure can pick 'em" and that usually cures me.

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I keep missing my ex. How do I improve my aim? Practice practice practice

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My divorce decree states that I am liable for the first 1700.00 of unpaid medical expense. Does this include covering the regular office copay and perscription copay or is it on the portion that insurance done cover> It depends on your state, and the exact wording of the decree. If it just states "first $1700 of unpaid medical expenses", I believe that includes office co-pays and prescriptions, glasses, dental co-pays. Or, it could be referring to what they call extraordinary costs. Ask your attorney.

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What do you think is the most common cause of divorce? marriage

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Three words after sex, what would you say? let's go again

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Where is the crazy-est place you have had sex? In a hospital bed (and there was someone else in the other hospital bed)...in a movie theater....on a hiking trail in Hocking Hills

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