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Does Islam really promote violence? Or is this just a misconception? Everyone who voted yes is a douche bag.

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Did your parents always say 5 minutes when you asked Are we there yet? my dad answered all my questions the same way: the back of his ring hand.

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A friend says she is now refinancing her house at 2% on a 30-year fixed loan because she is hispanic - how can a caucasian person get in on this? truth is you probably can't, but the same could be said to hispanics about the thousands of advantages that automatically come with being white...

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Are you usually honest? the only possible answer to this question is yes, which could be a lie. the answer no would be a paradox.

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If you woke up one morning & there was an Elephant in your room looking at you what would you do? kill it for the ivory. leave the rest of the body for the vultures

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What do you do if your wifes friend keeps coming on to you? Avoid her or tell your wife? Either way there are going to be hurt feelings. how is 'go for it' or 'talk them both into a three-way' not an option?

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Does A vegetarian diet consist of milk,cheese and eggs,or are these considered meat?* i like to slip small amounts of meat into vegetarians' food

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I want to date a midget, other than the circus where can i meet one? I have heard that they hang out at the ends of rainbows

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Who would you pie in the face? Why? What type of pie would you use? Do you think the type of pie matters? i will give you a top three: 1. Helen Keller 2. Hitler 3. The Queen of England Type of pie...I will go with French Silk, except for if its the Queen, then some sort of disgusting meat pie

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Who is your favorite wrestler? Past or Present who are past and present? i never heard of them

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What is your favorite Monopoly square? Community Chest, yo.

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Obama just separated himself from God on thursday when he bowed to an earthly king...."we must submit". is the message..so, there ya go!..i repudiate this man....only God can save him from his own "ring of fire"....i'm done...U? well, from what i know of the bible, there is the quote about giving unto caesar what is caesars, also the one about he who is without guild casting the first stone. but, I don't really put any stock in any of that. so i will close by saying you are dangerously retarded and i hope you dont breed.

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What brand of sunglasses do wear? ive got some ray-bans and some oliver peoples and some oakleys and a whole bunch of cheap-o gas station ones

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What is the worst thing about taking out the trash? making sure its all dead first

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Why can't i walk through a wall? because youre not doing it right. build up a lot of speed and lead with your head.

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How much cash do you have on you right this minute? many pieces of gold and silver

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Can you please use the word "jovial" in a sentence? so i asked this ese, chu gonna eat jovial meng? cuz that shitz expensive, meng!

| 1 person likes this

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What is something you would find inside the passenger seating area of an airplane? my DNA. the king is a mile high club frequent flyer, hey!

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Would you climb under the covers with a friend...just to cuddle? that is stupid and pointless

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Why do people answer questions that are made up just for fun and not answer the ones that really need an answer? stop whining

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Who has attended or is attending UC San Diego? How is it there, from its academics to its social life? both my cousin and a friend of mine went there and both loved it for academics and social life. i can say from experience that san diego is a lot of fun.

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Why do you hate morning? because night time is the right time

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Does anyone understand this whole G20 thing? yes. i am sure somebody does

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Anyone know how to build a web page in godaddy? judging by their commercials i think it has something to do with huge boobs

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Will the new $1.00 federal cigarette tax make you quit smoking? HELL NO. in fact, i am such a patriot, its gonna make me take up the habit just to give uncle same a few more bucks a day. YEE HAW

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Do you reap what you sew? hahaha...only if i wish it. the king of awesome is beyond reproach.

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Do you still use the phonebook? yellowpages.com only

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If u are in the middle of deciding between 2 guys and which one u rlly love...how do u no who the right one is the one with the most money

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Wouldn't it be nice if adults could keep the heart of a child? Sincere, forgiving, honest, and loving. i have the hearts of many children. in my basement.

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Girls who have hairy arms are extra beautiful right? I think so hahaha...hahahahahahahaha. no. hahahahahahaha

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Would you want to have a baby with me HELL NO!

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How did Jesus' love transform your life? it transformed my life the same way megatron transforms into a gun for starscream to hold

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We are not free..democracy or not..who can tell me why? so basically you are making some big philosophical statement and we should all be really impressed and report back to you with validation for your brilliant edict? is that right? sorry, not a fan of pontification.

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Is there anything exotic about the U.S.? well, theres an exotic bakery down the street from my place. its somethin'.

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OK no poking fun here. I loved the original Zelda and am wondering if there even exists a game that is similar to it now days? most zelda games are similar in one way or another, ya damned nerd

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So in saying that President-elect Barack Hussein Obama attended a Muslim school but hasn't practiced Islam, is that likening him to smoking Islam but not inhaling? no, but i am likening you to a paranoid dumbass

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I think i have had enough how about you? agreed

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What would you do if your grandmother decided to make a semi-racy calendar with her girlfriends? produce it

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Who would like to join me in congratulating Doggie S on becoming the number 1 male on Answerbag for all time? no thanks

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Do you have a beard or facial hair? do you mean am i growing facial hair currently? or do you mean do i have jars of other peoples' facial hair in a display case in my living room? yes and yes.

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What laws do you impose in your own little World? only awesome ones

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Where do AB trolls come from? from under your fat ass. youve been trolled!

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What Emblems or Pattern do you have on your Pjs or Nighty.? my pjs are fleshtone. thats right; the king sleeps in the buff.

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What ever happened to the dolphins the US military trained to search for explosives in the water in the middle east? they blew up. damned poor training...

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Does your favorite actor or actress have an official website? i dont know. my preferences for actors and actresses ends at watching their films. i have better stuff to do.

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Do you use dryer balls when machine drying your clothes? If so, do they work? i always strive to use dryer balls. thats why i use gold bond.

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What yoyo is this? its yo yo ma

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What makes it so that pink is not acceptable for a baby boy to wear, but blue ok for a baby girl to wear? well i dont know that its not ok for anybody to wear anything. however, blue can be gender neutral, whereas pink is universally feminine. so there you go.

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What (if anything) do you collect? scalps. i have 17.

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How beautiful is it to be loved? it wasnt so good for eva braun(sp?)

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What was Michelle Obama thinking when she put on this dress? what were people like you thinking when you thought this was worth discussing?

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What does the " T " in T-Mobile stand for? tits

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I say marble, you say ____? madness. think about it. there is no better answer

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Why it is always the new generations that have to pay for the greed of the past one? it is what it is.

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I get around. Do you get around? haha most definitely

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How does death affect you? depends. whose death are we talkin about here. i mean, death generally doesnt appeal to me, but there are some folks that if i heard had died, i might just be okay with it.

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What's a sure sign that your marriage is over? when i shovel the last bit of dirt on my ex

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If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around, does it make a sound? hopefully it makes the sound of a tree smashing a pseudo-intellectual

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How do you deal with people who are always pessemistic about everything? i kick'm in the BALLS!

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Of course, who doesn't like __________, after all? boobies

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What do you have that I might need? a soul

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Guys - are you aware that men also get breast cancer? yeah, thats why i stay in shape so i dont have breasts

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Ladies whats worse: An a**hole, a pathetic man, a cheater or a golfer? thats a trick questions...golfers are all pathetic assholes and most of them cheat

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Would you look down on someone because they have artificial house plants? well sure, what else should i look down on them for

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What is the first thing you associate with a rain forest? future furniture or the movie Furngully

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How do you define your self worth? add the worth of everybody else, then times it by five. at that point, youre sniffin at my worth.

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Do you have the qualities of a rock star? i cant sing or play and instrument, but i do have TONS of unprotected sex, so yeah

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When your upset you usually ___________? correct somebody's misuse of the word your when the person should have said you're

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Would you date someone with the same name as you? im not gay, so no.

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A person attacks you. What do you do? whoop. that. ass.

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What is the best way to dispose a condom? are they not reusable anymore?

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Which country would you nuke? Why? greece. they know why...

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Do guys only look at girls' bodies? no. we also look at boobies.

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How will you feel if Obama wins the popular vote, but loses the electoral? i will feel like getting a militia together and making something happen

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I think im fat and i weight 116 pounds i think youre dumb and dont ask questions

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How come george bush is hiding? he heard if they dont find him by inauguration day, he gets four more years

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I have dreadful dial-up. UGH. Does anyone else have it? no. i live in 2008.

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Do guys have any emotions after a breakup? never. men are made of stone. if your ex "man" shows emotion, he was really a hairy woman.

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The World is big enough for all of us..so why are you on my cloud? There's enough clouds for us all...right? absolutely not. all clouds are under the dominion of awesome. you are leasing your clouds from me. never forget that.

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Why is Palin so weird? because the witch doctors are getting at her despite her many attempts to ward them off

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Can you describe yourself in 3 words? go fuck yourself

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Which category do you fall into? a non smoker, an ex smoker, or a smoker? STOP TRYING TO LABEL ME!!!!!!!!

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Do things in our life happen for a reason or does everything happen by chance? yes

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Are some animals (other than humans) gay, bisexual, asexual, or transgendered? duckies is queer as a three dollar bill

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What was the last thing that made you cringe? every time an AB user thinks they put me in my place i cringe. twice tonight so far.

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Is mankind destroying the planet beyond repair? it is a testament to the hubris of humanity that we believe we are damaging the earth beyond repair. the earth will survive us just like it survived everything else. just because we make it less livable for ourselves doesnt mean the world is somehow not going to sustain anything anymore. when we are gone it will keep on spinnin, baby.

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Hey everyone!!!! I have an anouncement Debtahals has reached Sage! And on her mom's birthday! Party time! Please congratulate her! people party over that? if thats true, then i bet youre more excited about the points youll get bringing it up than you actually are for debtahals achievement

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What's the worst thing to say to your boss when she/he is in a bad mood? "if you see her, tell your daughter she was GREAT last night. she'll know what i mean."

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Is the grassy knoll greener on the other side? funny question. and yes.

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Does your family sit down and eat at the table as a family? In front of the TV? Everyone on their own? i eat dinner with this kid that lives across the street, a dead lizard, and a stuffed bear. if that counts as a family, then yes, yes i do. i dont own a tv.

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Are you: a) salt or pepper b) mustard or mayo c) sweet or sour d) cornflakes or capt'n crunch e) baked or fried? Why? im a goddam person. what kind of hogwash is this?

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I love my job because_________________________ I'm a pimp and, contrary to popular believe, it IS easy.

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Would you give me your address if i said that everyone that answers this question will be sent a dollar in the mail? oh yeah, a dollar is soooo worth putting my address on the internet

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What do you think comes after death? whose death are we talking about?

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What can boost a woman's confidence in herself and her looks? plastic surgery

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How would you react if your mother or father told you (out of the blue) that "I love you and I'm proud of you, always remember that"? i guess i would say, when did you stop hating me?

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What is the biggest thing you have ever been part of? word my ass

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We all often eat dinner at the dining room __________? The answer isn't table. my ass

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Would you disown your child if they were transgender? i dont give no shit what my child is so long as it can throw that pigskin a country mile. ITS GAME TIME!

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Why is child pornography illegal? Please read the my own answer... I needed detail space youre a sick fuck

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Why does everyone agree with the stereotype that smokers are rude people? whenever im trying to do anything, including eat a meal for example, and a bunch of assholes light a bunch of poisonous fires all around me i consider them rude. then when they wine about personal freedoms while i choke on their stupid little fires, i get even more annoyed.

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If you have to make a movie on politics what would be its Title? "Hey Democrats, come spend 8 bucks on my movie, make me rich, go home feeling smarter, and continue to do nothing about whatever it is you were pissed off at for an hour and a half"

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What fits in the category of was is and will be? stand-up philosophers

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What's the name of the green, talking turtle that kids like? mr. smithy

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How many dead people do you think just faked their death? well if they are dead, they arent faking are they?

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How effective are condoms at preventing pregnancy they have to be better than a sheet of aluminum foil, i can tell you that, goddammit!

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I just killed a donught. Do you think I am a bad person? first of all i say keep this question line going if its gonna piss somebody off. second, i think youre a bad person because you put the gh in the weirdest place in that word. but the killing is ok.

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Im ALWAYS going toilet!!! am i weird?? i need to go like every 1/2 hr, and i dont even drink alot!! help! youre ALWAYS writing nonsense questions. u are weird!! i need to never read your insanity again, and u arent funny! stop!

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What are your thoughts on PARENTS who still smoke pot? Is it wrong? if anything, more parents should START smoking pot

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Should DiHydroMonOxide (DHMO) be banned? Way to post an old Penn and Teller bit from their Showtime series and pretend it was your idea. Brilliant.

| 1 person likes this

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My kitchen cupboards are wooden and look old what can i do to make them look better? start them on fire and claim them on your insurance as being much nicer. they will buy you nice ones.

| 1 person likes this

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What's your favorite Coldplay song? the one that gets turned off to play some good music...let the minusing commence

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What is your favorite thing to do to pass time? In any situation. whack it

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If your life were a movie, what would the soundtrack be? you know those little wind-up monkeys in the little suits with the cymbals? that on loop.

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Today some boys at school dragged my bag through sticky jam, corn bits and the remains of someones salad. They thought it was someone else's.... do i have the right to be mad or should i get over it? hahaha...go ahead and get mad, if you were gonna do something about it, you would have already.

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If we played strip poker, what would you take off first? im a nudist, and we play 'get dressed poker.' admittedly, its not very fun at all.

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Do you think there is such a thing as a "functional pothead"? what kind of question is this? functional potheads arent like santa claus. they are real and everywhere. thats like asking, 'do you believe in stoplights?'

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Have you ever ate/killed/murdered any vegetables? carrots are bleeding, plants are screamin, and tomatoes cry...yeah, i kill veggies almost as often as i kill cows, chickens, and pigs.

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I have been in a relationship for over two years and for the most part we are doing great. We've been having some financial problems and arguing alot about it. I met an old friend online and it's brought back some feelings for him. What should I do? stop reconnecting with old flames online. how old are you? 12?

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Whether you agree with war or not, do you think it is fair to disrupt a homecoming parade (where soldiers returning from a long stint in a war zone are allowed to march through their regiment's home town) by holding a protest? fair has nothing to do with it. its one of our freedoms. at the same time, you would have to be a shithead. but thats what it's all about: freedom for everyone, even shitheads.

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Yes can i be fired with no evidence pending me guilty and without a reason other than i think you are the type that would do it? yes can u be fired for not speaking goodly

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How do you get used to wearing 4 to 5 inch heels after not wearing heels ever in your life? sounds like a reality show on fox

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Do you give your cat catnip or are you against it? How often? Does it drive them crazy? my cats dont usually go crazy unless i force feed them catnip. but then, they go crazy whenever i force feed them anything.

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Do you use a laptop instead of a computer? Why? is a laptop not a computer anymore? what the hell is causing all my typing to go onto the screen then? wtf is going on?!

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Name something your parents did, that you plan on never doing? have sex with each other

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What's the first thing you would say if you met our illustrious founder AB-Joel? your generic message board is apparently one of the most popular.

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When is the last time you held a little baby? today, running my ass off out of the maternity ward

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So is anybody looking for a girlfriend? lol putting lol after it so you can claim it was a joke doesnt mask that you are actually fishing for somebody to answer this seriously

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What is the most dangerous website ever? the one the engulfs the souls of newborn babies

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Does it upset you off when the toilet paper roll is on the wrong way? it upsets me when the toilet paper is on at all...i prefer the toilet paper roll to be sitting freely on the counter so i can pick it up and unravel as i choose...and no, all you fascist women out there, its not because im too stupid or lazy to put a new roll on the damn thing, its because i like it better off! deal with it! and another thing...if men are expected to always put the seat down...

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How do you talk to a guy to let him know that you are not interested? take him home a couple times then stop answering his calls...thats the best for everybody

| 1 person likes this

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What's the bleakest, ugliest, and most depressing city you've ever seen? Gary, Indiana --where dreams go to die.

| 1 person likes this

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WILL A V6 MOTOR FROM A 86 OR 87 GRAND NATIONAL MOTOR FIT IN A 86 MONTE CARLO? with a little elbow grease and some crowbars, no it wont. but you will have a great time trying

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Would you sleep with your 3rd cousin? do you mean again? or is there another third cousin i dont know about?

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Why do Australian and South African accents sound so similar? because south africa is in australia you dumbass

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If you were in a relationship for 2 years and your gf/bf cheated on you, but then said they would never do it again, would you believe them and keep trying? Or give up and move on? =( relationships are for suckers and communists

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What's your first thought when being accused of murder? not again...

| 1 person likes this

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WHY ARE THE GAS PRICES GOING UP BECAUSE DEMAND HAS MAINTAINED ITS LEVEL FROM WHEN THE PRICES WERE LOWER AND BECAUSE THEY CAN

| 2 people like this

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Will you excuse me while I stuff this pasta up my nose? by all means, have at it

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What does your workout schedule consist of? pillaging, plundering, and general overthrowing

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Do we always have a choice? no you dont...you cant choose to breathe anything but oxygen for example

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What the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word 'coke'? two hookers and an eightball

| 1 person likes this

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Where can I get one of those? sorry baby, theres no store that sells these, you just gotta enjoy the one god gave ya.

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Did you hear about the kid that got hit by a train last night in florida? yes i did, just now, when i read your question

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What is sasquatch also known as? Santa!

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Jeez my friend is bipolar (she is happy one day and unhappy the next) how do i deal with her? let me spell it our for you L-I-T-H-I-U-M

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May I hold your hand? only if the price is right

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My girlfriend asks me why I love her. I explain what I can in words but the rest doesnt make sense to me, she thinks that means I dont love her because shes asked exs the same thing and they couldnt explain. Sticky situation, what do I do? stop being a pussy

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If you can't get in trouble for doing something would it still be fun? well i never got in trouble for having sex but it still kicked ass every time

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Are aliens free from original sin? you mean mexican aliens? i dont know...they are mostly catholic so i would guess they believe they are not.

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What is your friendly neighborhood policeman up to? probably harassing minors for no reason other than it makes his member feel huge

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Sims 2 keeps crashing...again. As soon as I get into a house it freezes. I have to restart my computer. I meet all the requirements.... HELP!!! that is god crashing your computer. he is saying "i gave you a real life and you slap me in the face by embracing an artificial one? shaaaaaame."

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I want to Lose Weight NOW! Any Help? stop eating so much fatty

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Hello its me, what would you like to know--I'll do this once only..so? i would like to know who the hell you are to think youre important enough to think anybody cares that youre offering yourself up? oh shit, i fell right into your trap...

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Do you think four years is a long time? george bush sure makes it feel that way

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Why is the cookie monster on Sesame Street blue? because thats the color jim henson make him

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Do fuel additives work? depends on how you mean that...i add sugar to some peoples fuel...and it definitely works the way i want it to

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What motivates you? a burning desire to see everyone but me fail...in short i want to have the longest straw so that I can drink your milkshake

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Ok, i got answers for a test coming up tomrow and i was wondering if i should give the answers to a girl i like to get attention or should i just get a 100 percent on the test and impress her that way? who are you and why do you impersonate a young person just to ask this question? what do you hope to accomplish?

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Jordin Sparks? Cute,ugly, or inbetween? Possible the dumbest question of the day...minus

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What would make your opinion more valid or less valid than others? i generally know more about most things than most people, so i guess that answers that

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Will you be disappointed in me if I become nothing? being nothing is a lot better than being a lot of other stuff...take a whole mess of the users on this site for example...

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Would you rather have a cantaloupe, hondeydew melon, or a watermelon? watermelon SON!

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A few of you might be familiar with the French novel 'Fanny' by Marcel Pagnol. What would happen if baby Cesar died? (character's reactions & how their lives would change, and what proof/explanation do you have?) Thanks in advance! wow. somebody wants their homework done for them...

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Has anyone read the book or seen the loose screen adaptation of Stephen King's "The Mist?" no. nobody has.

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Describe three ways that ionizing radiation is useful. 1 then it isnt deionized anymore 2 you can sell it to people who want it that way 3 when your stupid mom comes over and bitches about how you havent done anything with your life you can push it in her stupid fat face and yell 'If Im so worthless, how come i was able to ionize radiation, huh, Mom! How come?!'

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What is the sexiest part of the body. I find that the sexiest part of the body is the boobies.

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Do you find that if you see something in all caps, that you simply ignore what's being said? i dont ignore it because i dont adhere to this stupid 'rule' or 'belief' or whatever that it somehow means somebody is shouting...i cant hear typed text; it has no volume. anybody offended by all caps needs to log off and go outside for a while

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What wouldn't you try at least once? gay sex...nothing against gays, but no thanks.

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What are the two roles for water in a nuclear power plant? for the technicians to drink and to throw in the face of the safety inspecter when hes taking too long of a nap

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Hypercompetitive people have a need to compete and win at any cost as a means of maintaining their self-worth. Is this a by product of envy? are you sure its not just because winning is more fun than losing?

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How can i get my curly hair strait? burn it with lye

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Could you give up all possessions? whose possessions are we talking about?

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What is the hardest thing to say to someone? "I just accidentally put your baby in a blender and then ate it with nachos while giving your spouse herpes." I can never get it all out in one try.

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My girlfriend is incredibly insecure. What can I tell her to reassure her that I am trustworthy and that honest decent men exist, and that she is beautiful? I feel like nothing I say or do gets across to her, I cant win. that means she is just faking it as a power-hungry grab for attention...stop catering to her whining and dump her ass. move on.

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Hey, all you down raten mothers, bring it on.... What is your problem? haha...been there...my guess is you want this one in the negative so here ya go...

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Why did you join answerbag? to kill time and for a few cheap laughs...oh and the points...my life begins and ends with the points (sarcasm)

| 1 person likes this

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Did you know that every time you positively rate somebody, an angel gets their wings? Well im about to clip a pair of wings with a nice fat minus for this stupid question.

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How does government and the media conspire to keep Americans divided? If Americans united as taxpaying citizens (despite our differences), wouldn't 'they' have everything to lose and citizens everything to gain? you forget to mention the collective, laziness, bigotry, apathy, etc. of the citizenry. it is not as if humanity is some generally benevolent force kept seperated only by the will of the ruling class. we all suck. if six billion people really wanted change, it would happen whether a couple people on top tried to break it up or not.

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Do you like to ask questions or answer questions better? Either is good if it provokes serious thought or conversation.

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How is a chain reaction controlled in a nuclear power plant? with proton packs a la ghostbusters...just dont cross the beams

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It wold not be too bad to live in a cave?. It wold not be too bad to ask a real question?

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Why are there so many judgemental trolls on AB lately? because its an easy place to be an anonymous douchebag...and boy do folks love being anonymous douchebags

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How can I get a boys attention? tight clothes...it sucks but its the truth

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I've only been on few times in the last month or so. Have we lost any more AB "oldtimers"? i don tknow. but this one is back baby!

| 5 people like this

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Is there any law that says your stepdad cant beat you. afraid not, son. afraid not.

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How to treat diarhea you ever hear that story about that little kid in warsaw by the dam?

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What is your favorite seriously outdated dance move? definitely the sprinkler

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Do you believe drugs can kill you? i dont believe it; i know it. however, i dont think they are nearly as dangerous as they are portrayed in the media and by many advocacy groups, at least not some of them anyway.

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Would you break off your committed, personal relationship for a million dollars? not in one at the moment, but if i were, hell yes

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Last week I had my 40th birthday. My husband of 20 yrs. gave me a card and a chocolate bar( he's going to LV). My feelings were very hurt and now I'm angry. I make a big deal of everyone's b-day but m get over it

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Does anyone have an opinion on michael vick's situation? no. nobody does.

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Do you think god loves me depends on which god youre talking about...athena might, but i highly doubt that odin does

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Can usa electrical products be used in the uk? definitely. you just gotta jam the plug in a little harder

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Have you ever played monopoly with the same rules twice? constantly...i am a stickler for rules...i guess it pisses some people off, but i do state it up front, so if you agree to play with me then tough shit if you dont like following rules

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How many people here on Ab go to church on Sundays? Do you check AB before you go? i dont go to church...it turns out i dont need some schmuck in a collar to get closer to god, or whatever you want to call the higher power

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What do you think about people who put as many Satanic references into their username as possible in order to be rebellious? (example: hellfirespawn666) i dont think shit about them until they say something that bothers me...i have been way more thoroughly annoyed by people with overt christian imagery on this site than by these supposedly rebellious people that you are asking about

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Do you think there is ever a good reason to hit a child? of course there is...hypothetical: kid has a knife or similarly dangerous weapons and apparently plans to use it. if you dont hit the kid, youre a dumbass

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What is your favorite thing about gravity? no doubt about this one: fat people falling, preferably off of skateboards or bicycles

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If you were going to war in the middle ages what wepon would u use? war hammer or battle axe, probably duel wield one in each hand

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Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said, "I think I'll drink whatever comes out of those things when I squeeze 'em!"? smart moneys on the first guy who fucked a sheep

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What is your favorite old school video game? this should answer the question

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Scientists say this generation is the peak of the evolution of mankind. Do you believe this? if i am any indication, then yes, yes i do

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What is the one thing you would do if you had no financial limitations? fistfight a whole bunch of people...hannity, bush, o reilly, etc.

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Whta's your favorite color combo? dark grey and slightly darker than dark grey

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Theists: Why do you worship something you don't know exists? interesting

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Do you care what i think about you? not even a little bit

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Do you like the taste of beer? some more than others but hell yes

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What do you think of scientology? the same thing i think about all organized religion...SCAM

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Which profession requires you to be completely heartless? i have already answered but bill hicks has an opinion i would like to help him voice

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Which profession requires you to be completely heartless? insurance exec

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Atheists: Why dismiss something that you do not know exists? first of all, way to shape the argument to sound like atheists are just being assholes...real slick. second of all, it makes more sense to not believe in something if you havent seen it than it does to blindly follow it, dont you think? and if your response to this is that you didnt see it, but that you fealt it, then shut up because youre full of shit

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Do you believe in death before life? no i dont, but i do believe in life after love

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Don't you just hate when something holds you up and when you get home you JUST missed the person you want to talk to? if by 'person you want to talk to' you mean 'ability to watch porn and masturbate without interruption because you got home before anybody else' then yes

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Mild, Hot, or Fire? Fire, because none of them are hot at all and i like its flavor the best

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Do you hack your own path through the jungle or do you prefer to follow the path that others have provided? hack, hack, HACK!

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If had a choice between dating a really smart guy and a really tall guy, who would you date? im straight, so neither thanks

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Why do some people think that if you don't have a child, you have lost out on life's greatest moments? Isn't that generalizing and/or being judgmental pf others? isnt this statement of yours being judgmental of the judgmental people? and before you get all witty, yes my statement here is judgmental of you. we are all judgmental. the key is not to let it do serious harm

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Can kids drink alcohol? Why? of course they can...and for our amusement of course

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If my mailman sprays my dog with mace, will it damage my dog's eyes? not so much as it will hurt my lungs from laughing so hard if i ever see that happen...sweet revenge

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Am I being disrespectful to the American soldiers because I am not a fan of George Bush no. and everybody who says otherwise can eat my shit

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If my driver license has been suspended for not missing my court appearance in traffic court. Does that violate my rights being that driving is a right not a privilege dumbass question

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How can I get my husband not to drive so close to the car in front of him, and to not wait until the very last second to change lanes? you cant and you shouldnt...if the person in front of him is in any other lane but the right while your husband does this, he is completely in the right and should be given compliments and support from you...not negative nagging...if anything will cause an accident, its your complaining from the passenger seat distracting him while he is trying to drive properly

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Whats the worst thing a man can say to a women during labor? "by the way, if the test i took last month is any indication, you and the baby both have HIV"

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Who is your favorite openly gay celebirty..man or woman? george clooney

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I am a soldier in the US Army. My friends and I wonder if the people appreciate the fact that we are shot at everyday and in some cases die to protect U.S. intrests? you cant possibly believe that nobody supports you

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Are the leaves turning colors yet where you live? yes. but only because i go out at night and paint them all individually

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If you really were what you eat... what would you most likely be? a nipple

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I nuked the an anthill today, that's about thousands of lives right there, how come if I kill a dog, I get negative responses from people and could go to jail? That's only one lives compared to thousands of lives on the anthill? So size does matter? despite the rambling structure of this question, you make an interesting point here...i think size has only partially to do with it...the real issue, i think, is that dogs have personalities, or at least people assign dogs personalities, whereas ants dont or not perceived to anyway (size probably does play a factor here)...followup question: are you michael vick?

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What's under there? (You say: "Under where?") Haha, made you say "underwear"!!! What other great 1st-grade jokes do you know? thats first grade? i still use that one...i also enjoy "it smells like updog in here"

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Would you sleep with a politician? only if he had the good manners of tapping my foot first

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As of this moment, how long have you been sober for? this moment

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If you were payed a half of a million dollars to stay for a week in a haunted house, would you? if somebody is dumb enough to believe in a haunted house, i wanna know how they got their hands on half a mil...but sure, i will take it off their hands

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How would you deal with an uprising? i would meet it with my full military might...all prisoners will be made an example of after the fierce but brief battle

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Superman or Capt America ... which is your favourite? the captain by far...he is just a badass straight up...superman is some douchey alien who just gets lucky enough to have so many powers that he is unbeatable; and every time his one weakness shows up, he just somehow musters the strength to deal with it...lame

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I have come to believe that the more time and effort people put into pointing fingers at others, the more they are looking in the wrong direction. What are your thoughts on this? depends on the situation...i dont like to think in absolutes like this, especially when they sound like something out of a motivational speech

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If you were a deal or no deal box what number would you be? this question is insanely dumb

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What is your favorite spot to find potential dates? the ball pit at chuck e cheese's

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What's your favorite "F" word alternative? Freakin'? Fricken'? Effin'? Other? i like the word like i like my drugs, pure and uncut. FUCK yes

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Would you like to be able vote for one candidate from each party? good question. yes i would.

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What road is the white house on? (does it have a number?) Ex. 104 Bear Lane 1600 pennsylvania ave

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Did you know the search engine googlenegro.com saves energy and reduces tension on your eyes? this is an instance where culturally, certain words do not cross over well

| 1 person likes this

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If you were recruited to war, would you go? unfortunately yes...my principle of never fighting in a war i dont believe in would give way to my principle of never letting somebody else go in my stead

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Are you lookin' at me? what if i am?

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How do you feel when you ask a question about something and someone answers that they don't know anything about what you're asking about or when you receive similar answers to that effect? this has never really happened to me so any answer i gave would be purely hypothetical...i just dont know about this topic

| 1 person likes this

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When your goldfish died, did you bury it or flushed it down the toilet? my goldfish died BECAUSE i flushed it down the toilet

| 1 person likes this

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Are you working in your chosen profession? If not, why not? nope...im only 22, but im on my way...

| 2 people like this

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Who do you like better: the Energizer Bunny of Chester Cheetah? its not easy bein cheesy...

| 3 people like this

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Do you think Rudy Giuliani is a douche bag? oh my lord yes...i hope the tightasses dont get this question rejected for being offensive, because rudy himself is offensive

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If you and one other person stranded on a deserted island, would you rather that person be your current best friend or the actor or actress you consider the sexiest? actress...not because im a horndog, but because i dont wish that fate on my best friend...

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Does Hogan really know best? if by knowing best you mean using the last flicker of his popularity to create a show that will get his retarded daughter some free camera time to jumpstart her shitty bubblegum career, then yes, hogan knows best

| 3 people like this

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What do you think of male gynecologists? i think the position sounds much more glorious than it actually is, considering that probably only a fraction of what they see are healthy vaginas on attractive women...think about the rest...not worth it

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Is there a certain amount of questions you can post on answerbag? For example, is there a SPAM blocker, like if you post too many Q's in a minute? it has barred me from asking questions after a certain point before, yes

| 1 person likes this

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Have you ever campaigned for someone running for office? yep...but not very much

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Have you ever attempted to eat a vinyl record? the word 'attempt' suggests i didnt succeed. i ATE the damn thing

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"You can kiss my attitude." What would your personal tag line or bumper sticker say? there is no one line that defines me but if i had to pick something id go with something like "the only way is all the way" or "the only good reaction is an overreaction"

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What was the last thing you fixed? my cat

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Why do people tend to jump to conclusions instead of looking at the facts of life? there is little that cant be learned by looking at the facts of life...

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Why is a lock and key used to describe the way an enzyme work? And describe any ways in which the analogy is not perfect? there are no way in which it is a broken analogy. the analogy is perfect, hence its use.

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What was the last book you read about? the last book series i read was a comic series called Preacher. its about this guy who takes on god in an epic quest...it is fucking awesome and everybody should read it. the series shows you what comics are capable of

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Is it wrong that after work I prance around in the nude? Is it even worst if I said that I like it? prancing around nude is almost never wrong...furthermore, youre a fool if you dont do it immediately after work

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If Slurm was the most delicious drink on the planet, would you still drink it if you knew where it came from? (From a Futurama episode) maybe you should explain that it comes from a spaceworms ass

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What are you doing after work? im already doing it

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Who gets to keep the ring after an engagement has been broken? if anybody says anything other than the man gets to decide(provided hes the one who bought it) they are morons...engagement rings are ridiculous anyway... 'wow, im about to give up bjs and eventually half my stuff if this lady decides she's not in love with me anymore. the only fair thing is for me to buy her an extravangant, useless stone to sweeten the deal for her' this is...

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Do you think humankind will become a peaceful race someday? when we vaporize ourselves with atom bombs or when the sun explodes, whichever comes first...only then will we be peaceful

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I need friends! Will anyone be my friend? PLLLEEEESSSEEE i never turn down friend requests

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I am doing a detective paper on paris hilton. When was the first time paris hilton got arrested? why should anybody give a shit?

| 1 person likes this

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Whats the easiest way to get in shape? By this I mean a sixpack and muscle. specific exercises or just any tips, anyone? its hard to beat swimming for fat burning, especially since it is easier on your joints than running

| 1 person likes this

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Would you buy stolen goods if they're being sold for a really low price? depends on what goods, but probaby yeah

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Someone stole a bunch of oxy-contins at my place of employment. As a result we will all be drug tested. I feel this is a violation of the 4th amendment.not only that, but what will this drug testing prove? what are your thoughts? i saw somebody with the answer, 'if you have done nothing, you have nothing to worry about'...that is a bullshit backdoor way of rolling back your rights...that being said, i have to disagree that your rights are being violated, depending on the state you are living in, it is possibly well within the rights of the employer to require drug screening. you also have the right to quit;...

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Dont you hate it when your question(s) gets deleted or points deducted by a person who just doesn't like you? If you could, how would you punish that person? i love it when people think i give a shit...i just wish when they do it they would leave a comment

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Where you at? what are you working for BOOST mobil now?

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How can I stop being an over-bearing girlfriend? I'm treating my boyfriend how my mother treats me, and he hates it as do I. Any tips on how I can make myself stop? umm just knock it off...

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I like to ask/answer questions {when appropriate} that will encourage a chuckle or two. Does this piss you off? no. in fact, it pisses me off when people are pissed off at this...humorless asswipes need to swallow their own heads and stop Fing up my universe

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What's your favorite airport? Least favorite? i forget the name but the one in Las Vegas is great because it means im in Las Vegas...and there are slot machines in your face the minute you get off...my least favorite is the one is ft lauderdale, it just sucks

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Which celebrity would you like to see compete on 'Dancing With The Stars'? stephen hawking

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What is the best sport in the world? rugby...any sport that starts like this has to be awesome

| 1 person likes this

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Would you willingly sacrifice freedom for temporary security? 'those who trade freedom for security deserve neither'

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Where did the term "six feet under" come from, as in burial it came from that being how far down a dead person is buried...come on now

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What does your boss call you? i have no boss

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When starting a new book, what is more interesting to you character development or do you like the mood set with the scenery? definitely character...although really i think a strong or interesting voice pulls me in the most...and before you say that this is a part of character development, that is not always so...sometimes it is, but if the narrator is not a character then it is not

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For whom do the bells toll? it tolls for thee, sucka

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Can you deny and lie to yourself about being homosexual? well, if i actually am one, then ive been doin a damn good job lyin to myself because i believe i am straight

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What's the most pleasant thing you've ever woken up to? a hummer

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Can I get a "Hallelujah"? no

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What nicknames have you accrued in your life? I've been "Red," "Smokey," "Lizz," "GI Jane" ... i was at this party in chicago and i was runnin around an alley drunk cuz i was takin a leak and outside some guys apartment i found this big robot costume made out of a cardboard box and aluminum foil and i put it on and went back inside and started doin the robot and yelling 'partybot lives for the weekend!' so everybody called me partybot for a while...that was pretty good

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Out of you and all the people you know, which person has the worst temper? my family is all pretty nuts...i guess when im on ten mine could give anybody a run for their money, but it doesnt happen all that much

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What is your favorite shade of green? the one i see every sucka turn the minute my fly ass hits the scene

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Should people in the US have to apply for a license or take some sort of test in order to reproduce(have kids)? yep...and i will take it a step further. chemical castrations for all those who illegally mate

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When was the last time you weighed yourself? two weeks ago...265...but with a 36 waist, not so bad, eh?

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How old were you when you first went fishing? Did you catch anything? i been fishin since i could lift a pole...my first real fishin trip out with my pops was when i was prolly ten or so and i caught three walleye and my dad caught two and we ate'm that night...awesome memory

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I have three jobs to do that involve a degree of fear, 1) re-roof a steep 32 foot tall house, 2) work in a crawl space loaded with spiders, and 3) work 2 miles back in the woods where there are 3 active bear dens & a large wolf pack. Which to choose? surely some sort of person could be paid to do these things

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What was the name of Hitler's dog? checkers

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WHAT do you tell your three your old child when they ask ,"mommy how are baby's made?" i guess first i sternly scold the child and inform it that i am daddy, not mommy...second, i tell the kid to be quiet and not ask so many questions when NASCAR is on

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What is your favorite stoner movie? jay and silent bob strike back or possibly half-baked

| 1 person likes this

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What do you think is the greatest song of all time? as generic as it is to hear idiots howl it at bands...i still think a case can be made...

| 1 person likes this

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Is it true that we're all a little gay on the inside? hopefully women are anyways

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I drove through a Rainbow once. the interior of my truck lit up brightly. But people say that that is impossible because 'Rainbows don't touch the ground' Can anyone else verify that it IS possible because they too have done it? one time i tripped on acid too and i met roy g biv as well...it was crazy and the doors were all walking on the banana paved road

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What is your favorite food that is yellow? nanners, nelson. nanners.

| 1 person likes this

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Can you answer this question using your answer only as an image or picture that will still make sense? a

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If you to had to name your first name after a kind of tree and your last name after a kind of animal ,what would your name be? pussywillow ocelot

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Do you like to go for walks without any particular direction in mind? absolutely

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You have to spend $100.00 (U.S.) at the local 7-11 store and consume everything you buy within 2 hours. 1) can you do this? 2) what do you buy? first of all, shit yeah you can...second of all, a bunch of big gulps because i can drink more than i can eat...and i guess some jerky and sammiches and crap

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Who's going to watch the season premier of "Heroes" tonight? just here killing time til then

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General Petraeus or General Betray Us? at least disclose that youre quoting something instead of claiming the question for yourself...

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What CD do you own that would surprise people? if you mean people who dont know me well, probably half my collection...if you mean people who know me ok, i guess the garden state soundtrack

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You have one each $1, $5 , $10, and $20 bill in your dresser drawer. you close your eyes and select one of the bills. what is the probability that the sum of the remaining bills is greater than $30.00? 50%

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My grandson (5months) has a upper respirtoray infection. what can we do help him. stop trying to get answers here and take him to a doctor

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Do you feel others' suffering very deeply? i mean,people who you don't even know, people in history, homeless people or hungry animal on the street? i can get downright sad when i think of people in pain & its driving me crazy..could somethin b wrong? yes i do. i dont know if theres somethin wrong with it unless it starts really hurting you...empathy is a good thing, especially if if motivates

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If one is a stag on the stock market, is a yield of 20% before taxes on small cap desireable? using vocabulary like that, im guessing you already know

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Is it true that teenage guys only want to be with a girl to get into their pants? a lot of the time, yes

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How would i be able to legally use a few lyrics from a song in a comic book that I'm trying to get published honestly, i think youre allowed to reference things from pop culture for free to a certain extent under something i think is called the fair use act...check it out though, im not positive

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Why do people shout at inanimate objects? because inanimate objects are always doing what i dont want them to just to spite me...so i gentle them down a bit

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Do you like milk? oh god yes

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Do you eat at the table or in front of the TV? both

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What would be the one question that you would like Hillary Clinton to answer truthfully? what type of tape does she use to conceal her penis?

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Do you prefer the canned modern country music compaired to the music of Bob Wills and Patsy Cline? i am more of a johnny cash guy, but i really hate modern country...it sucks a whole bunch

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What, according to you, is the root of all evil? how about the creator of all three? (ourselves)

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Do you put the lime in the coconut and drink them both together? if thats the doctors orders, who am i to question them?

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How different would the world be if there were no bondries and no religion? really its impossible to tell...without those things, we would just find some other way to arbitrarily group ourselves against one another

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Was Jesus a fraud? i cant say for sure, but everybody around him is

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If your wife/husband/gf/bf goes on a 5 week business trip..what would you do? play with myself i guess

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Do you think short people should be considered handicapped? no

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Do you give people the benefit of the doubt a lot? hardly ever

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Have you ever seen anyone die? just about, yes

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Is morning wood caused by men having sexual dreams? i just like to have somewhere to put my hat until i go outside

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Have you ever smelled a Passion Flower or eaten its fruit? thats kind of a personal question, isnt it?

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Do you prefer to pay with cash, cards or checks? being a colonial blacksmith, i prefer the barter system

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Do you focus more on how to spend less money or how to make more money? i focus on not getting cought by this cop with these electronics under my arm...money can come later

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What do you think of gas prices? they suck

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If you won a contest stating that they will pay one of your bills, which bill would it be? probably bill, my bookie

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Could you ever forgive someone who physically abused you? couldnt possibly pretend to know...nobodys ever had the balls to attempt to physically abuse me

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What is your favorite movie you watched when you were little? short circuit or caddyshack...still a favorite movie

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Why are some gay? Why cant we all just convert and then there will be no hatred left in this world! No rude answers or ill report! if you dont want rude answers, dont ask rude questions, you fucking twat

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I want to do a quick deed to dad for my house off want off title and deed can he refi it if i am off yes. but do it before the equinox

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What is the best Alfred Hitchcock movie of all time? is that the MAD magazine guy? "what, me worry" haha that guys is hilarious...

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Have you ever eaten a fresh pomegranate? Did you like it? yes it was fantastic...well worth having hades drag me down to the underworld for most of the year

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Do you think games like soduku excersize your brain? absolutely

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Well, it seems that AB did not understand my question about being "three score" and asking if it deserved points. I meant that I had just turned Sixty years old. I have wisdom to depart to anyone who wants it. I enjoy it. its funny to see somebody using the word depart when he/she should be using the word impart in a statement about the wisdom he/she has...not a dig, just a humorous observation

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Car RamRod, get it? you didnt say it...

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What does 2 Timothy 3:16 tell us about who wrote the Bible? who cares...its all so much nonsense

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Provide a short sociological commentry upon the notion of a ''normal'' family in contemporary Scotland -ahem- (shuffles important papers, adjusts tie, pushes glasses up nose, and raises hand with one finger extended in exaggerated fashion while taking a deep breath in...) scottish families is fucked up, son!

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My boyfriend says he loves me. I know I love him, but he doesn't seem as interested as he says he is. We live an hour away from each other and our work hours conflict. What should I do? ummm get over it or break up i guess...what kind of answer do you want anyway?

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How does radical feminism explain the contribution being a mother in a lone parent family has upon her life chances this question makes no sense

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Hey, can we outright curse here because I'm about to blow. i always do

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My dog's fur is soooo soft, I could stroke her all day. What's something you love the feel of? boobs

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What college did you go to and do you recommend it to people? elmhurst college...small private school near chicago. really good depending on what you go for...kinda expensive though

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Howcome some poop sinks, and some floats? because pooping is one of lifes little pleasures, and variety is the spice of life

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Have you ever said I'm sorry when you're not.? hahaha hell no

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How i can make sombody loveme? money

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What is your biggest pet peeve as far as personalities go?As in, what annoys you the most about a certain type of personality? condescension (sp?) and passive aggression are both on the top of my list

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What can I do to get adjusted to a different time zone? is there some sort of elixir or tincture nearby that might aid your quest?

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What MLB Team or teams had the most consecutive league pennants and world series wins to their credit. im gonna have to guess yankees

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Why do cows moo? and why do they moo at night? they moo because you havent shot them yet...now get to work

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When is a banana technically ripe? whenever i say it is...

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What is the big deal with some ABers about questions typed in UPPER CASE? because this place is full of sticklers for the nonsense net rules which includes it being rude to type in uppercase because it means youre yelling...but this is at least five kinds of retarded because its only yelling if you imagine it that way when you read it...keep on upper casin it. i got your back

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Would you rather have a potato or a banana? they both mean so much to me...this is seriously as brutal as sophies choice...

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In their prime, who would win?. Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Chuck Norris, Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan, Jet Li, Jason Scott Lee, Sylvester Stallone, Steven Seagal, Charles Bronson, Steve McQueen, Jean-Paul Belmondo, PeeWee Herman i asked this question a while back but had urkel instead of peewee...blatant ripoff

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What job do people think is hard but is incredibly easy? i currently work as a warehouse hand in chicago to pay for school, so i go to a lot of union construction sites...there is one particular site ive visited every day, and this asshole gets union journeyman money to push buttons on the elevator and persists to bitch about his job more than anybody i have ever seen in my life

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Who is your better half and do they have a jetpack? this question deserves points for existing...i have no answer though

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Does anyone out there actually have a "normal" family anymore? did anybody ever have one to begin with?

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24 hours in a day … 24 beers in a case …coincidence? i am the one that minused you for asking a question you read off of a t shirt

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What song(s) do you like the "remake" by a different band of? Do you like them more or less than the original? Which version did you hear first? g love did a cover of greatest hits by sublime...and although sublime is my favorite over g love overall, g loves version is better

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Do you breakdance? i put turbo to shame

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2 years ago my class went on a boat and on the boat we were standing in a crowd and a pretty girl was infront of me i got a boner and it rubbed against her butt and i thnk she felt it and now i have some classes with her does she remember? riddle me this...which is worse: she remembers and finds you a pervert, or doesnt remember because your boner is unimpressive?

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Who is the phoniest Television Evangelist on the tube right now? george bush

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Do you have an innie or an outtie belly button? i have your wife in the trunk of my car is what i have...now lets talk ransom...but my car is an audi

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At the risk of self-stereotyping, if you could place one label on yourself, what would it be? (nb: no "pricetags", etc. please) the motherfuckin greatest!

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Why are men wearing earrings just to piss you off

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Do you think being attracted to the same sex is hereditary or taught? im gonna have to say that you are born gay...do i believe there are some straights that choose to give it a try, yes...but overall, its something youre born with...the thing that is learned is how to be an asshole that cant deal with somebody having a different lifestyle than what you think is right

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If you saw yourself at a club or a bar, would you flirt with yourself? if i were gay, you betcha, but im not...but then, if anybody were to turn me, it would be me...so i guess it is possible

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Do you like or dislike the Walt Disney Company? Why? i like a few of their products, but overall i think their company is mostly evil, seriously

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What writing process have you used in the past? · What worked well for you? What is your biggest obstacle to becoming an effective writer? if youre a fast typist, which i am, (im talkin 80-100 words per minute) i find it most effective to just start writing about whatever i think my topic is, or if i dont have one, just write anyway...the beauty is, you record everything, and you can rewrite...the biggest strength of writing is that we can edit, so just get to it

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Name the closest thing to you that is red? my dogs pecker

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Whats the craziest law you've ever heard? the patriot act comes to mind, but thats just whats fresh in my memory. i know theres worse

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Commando ....yes or no ?...why? the arnold movie? it rocks...he enters carrying a tree and a chainsaw, how awesome is that?

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Can you survive a cemi trailer running over your car? if im not in it, sure

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What is the alternative to saying "I need to use the bathroom?" i need to make a donation to the children of crapistan

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If you were a sound, what sound would you be? ka-BOOM

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Why should we hire you? because if you do, we can all get this money

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What do you secretly love that people might make fun of if they knew? thats a pretty great question first of all...but honestly, i cop to just about everything...the comic books, the movie love actually, my cats, all the fruity uncharacteristic stuff...i just dont give a damn

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Are you a 'camel toe' fan ?and why..males or females whats your opinions...turn on or turn off...for the record both my self and my lady think .....yum! turn on the juxtaposition of this question alongside a picture of calvin bites to the very core of me...to answer the question; i go on a case by case, toe by toe basis...some are good, but some are flatout tragedies

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Do country folk really eat possum stew? i can say with authority...YES

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When you were a child what article of clothing did you hate to wear? having been raised by feral cats, my childhood was spent almost entirely in the nude

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What do you taste like? if you got fifty bucks you can find out

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If there is an infinite amount of space around each one of us does that make each person the center of the universe? no. only me.

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What is DHL shipping? Is there a DHL headquarter in the US? i think so...i work in a flooring warehouse in chicago, and we deal with DHL often enough...i have to figure theres a headquarters in the country somewhere

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Do you like Spaghetti and meatballs? when you say meatballs, do you mean like the food, or more like the stereotypical italian greaseball? yes and no, respectively

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How do you like them apples? i dont like'm one bit

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So you think you can dance? well? no. but do i give a damn? hell no.

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What about your parents did you not appreciate when you were younger , But do now? ive always respected the rents...but one thing i always respect is how hard they worked to keep me reading and doing homework and whatnot and to get me through college so i can do some good in this world

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How many eggs per day are to many? ive heard that more than one a day isnt good for you

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How do you like your cottage cheese? with some fresh fruit, mos def

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Are you sensitive about revealing your age or don't you care? THE KING IS 22!!!

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What are better? wolves or foxes? foxes are stealthy, but im a sucker for pack hunting ability...i like both equally as individuals, so im gonna have to give this one to whichever would kill the other in a one-on-one battle...which is the wolf i must wager

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Are you good at questions involving logic? let p equal 'you ask a question involving logic'...let q equal 'the king of awesome dominates the question completely' if p then q; every single time QED bitches

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If someone was the victim of rape, and already had contracted the HIV virus prior to the rape, would it still be the victims responsibility to inform his/her attacker of the deadly virus? who knows if by informing the attacker, it would stop him/her from raping again because somehow in that twisted head, infecting somebody with the virus on top of rape has finally crossed the line? still, glad the fucker got the hiv

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Is there any AB user whom you could recognise by their answering/questioning style even if they change their username, avatar and the personal info written in their profile? its hard because so many of them are the same boring homogenous crap...but there are a few that are unique, yes

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What is your favorite flavor of ice cream? vanilla...particularly of the blue bunny variety

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I can't believe my friend didn't know where ham came from? Do you know? Hamburg?

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Who is the best movie villan of ALL time? gotta go with vader...or, if you read a comic called Preacher, theres a guy named Jody in there who is pretty nasty

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What was your reaction the day of 9/11/01? 'goddammit...and george is our fucking president...' pretty much on loop in my head the whole day

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I have known people who, in order to relieve stress, have gone in the middle of the woods and screamed their lungs out. They emerge feeling refreshed and cleansed. How do you spell stress relief? s-t-r-e-s-s r-e-l-i-e-f

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What's the most embarassing tan line you've ever gotten? i generally wear sunglasses to the beach...when i forget to take them off and get the reverse raccoon style tan, that is pretty annoying

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What was the last card game you played? blackjack...won a thousand bucks...no foolin

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How is it possible to have this scenario on AB, is there a special spot for #10 that it is counted with the other nine? Any other strange glitches you've seen? Answer 10 out of 9 Read all answers yep im havin some probs too...plus i cant read a lot of comments

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If prostitution was legalized worldwide & socially acceptable, would you frequently engage in sexual acts with a prostitute? everyones a prostitute

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Cookies or brownies? impossible for me to answer...i hate riding the fence, but im gonna have to

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What is something that really presses your buttons? people

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I am fourteen and have never had a girlfriend in my life. Is this okay? not to slam the question or anything--although it sounds fake to me--why does this question have 317 points? i mean what the hell is so useful about this?

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Are you excited about voting for any of the potential U.S. Presidential candidates? Why or why not? i am excited to see george go

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Do you shovel snow in the winter? If so how long does it usually take you? i am the greatest snow shoveler in the chicagoland area...

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Why is it that a lot of rappers have to steal other people's music? Do they really have such a lack of talent that they can't even come up with anything original? theyre not the only ones...elvis and jimmy page both made their livings off of black music, and they are some of the most highly celebrated american musicians

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Can you name something simple, but very effective? a punch to the throat

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Do you think women should work or stay at home to be totally honest, i prefer when a woman stays at home, but its def up to the woman

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My son is being bullied at school, I have taught my kids to be kind and respectful to all. Now I am wondering if I am teaching them the right things because the other kids see them as weak and easy targets. What should I do? you can be respectful without taking shit...i hope the kids is still young enough to teach that to

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What can't you put a price tag on? being lucky enough to watch somebody fall off of a bicycle or skateboard

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Is there a difference between a movie and a film? yes...one is simply a structure, the other is a place you attach emotional content to

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Why does everyone hate cops? dont hate cops, just hate a lot of shitty cops, which there are plenty of...unfortunately i think that the bad outweigh the good

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Hypothetical question,if i gave you 50 grand and a aluminum baseball bat and said swing away and smash everything in the room. Would you? without hesitation

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Hey buddy, how can I get this car out of second gear?! the little nash rambler...i love that song

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My boyfriend got mad at me because I hugged my dad when he got me an ipod today for my birthday...my boyfriend said he doesn't want me hugging other guys...what can I do to make him happy? if this is a serious question, which i dont really believe it is, then your boyfriend is an asshole...dump him and maybe punch him in the face

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How do you feel about transsexual at the same places you work, and socialize at? if what you means is transsexual people being at these places...thats fine by me, everybody gets a fair chance in the kings court

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How do you think the world will end? if i ever get my hands on some sort of doomsday device...about three minutes or so after i figure out how it works

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Which song have you had stuck on your brain all day? pick me up before you go go, dont leave me hangin like a yo-yo

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What has been the greatest vacation you have ever been on? i went to new orleans last spring break (my senior year at college) with a bunch of friends to help the rebuilding effort...not a vacation in the kickin back sense, but it was the best one i have been on i think

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Which would you rather have: 10 Million Dollars Cash(tax free) or your dream home, built to your specifications; rent, tax, & utilities all included for free? pragmatically, youre an idiot not to take a dream home that has no cash stipulations

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What is an interesting fact about early civilizations? they were created four thousand years ago by our lord god and dinosaur bones were planted by the devil to throw us off the TRUE path...psych!

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Do you ever put salt on lemons to make them sweet? i put salt on lemons before i rub them in the eyes of kittens

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Does prayer work or is it just dumb luck? it works if youre praying to be a tool

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Can fat people bring their knees up to their chest only when i force them to...

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What do penguins have for lunch? the penguins in my basement eat a pretty steady diet of ground up children...that is until i put a boot in their face and make them fight each other

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How do I stop the telemarketers from calling me at home? trace the line, find out who personally called you, find their address, and murder their families

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If Iraq has PMS, and we're the guy, should we be tossing chocolate at it instead of trying to beat it into submission i dont like your ridiculous idea of the world stage, but i do enjoy your misogynistic undertones...no points awarded or deducted

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Flip Flops and socks am i starting a new trend or just looking like an idiot? either way i'm not stopping. i was gonna rip on you for thinking you were the first or that it would catch on...but i admire youre im not stopping attitude...keep up the good fight

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Texas Border problem as a current event. What should I do? learn how to ask a question that makes sense maybe

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Can Mentally handicapped people marry and or have kids? not in my kingdom

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Have you done it in the back seat, if so what kind of car was it? alllll the time

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What color are your nipples? fuschia

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Are you ready for some football! A monday night party!! wait a minute? It's thursday.......what the hell am I gonna do now? i was just about to ask a question like this...i am ready...go saints...for tonight anyway...then go bears

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What was mickey mouses original name mortimer

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What do you think of Ron Paul's War and Foreign policy? (See following link) http://www.ronpaul2008.com/issues/war-and-foreign-policy/ from what ive seen so far, hes the only republican who has anything close to what i consider the right idea...although im not all the way behind him

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Why are pedophiles looked down upon in prisons? i guess if i was some dude doing a bullshit mandatory minimum for trafficing drugs to make ends meet and there was some some asshole child-fucker sharing a cell with me, i would look down on him too

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Why aren't you dead yet? cuz i've yet to meet the man that can kill me

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Why aren't you dead yet? cuz i've yet to me the man that can kill me

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What is the worst song or artist out right now? avril lavigne and that insufferable girlfriend song...she has got to go

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I hate all my subjects i chose at school, i chose the ones im goos at and not the ones i enjoy. Should i take the dive and take the subjects i want and enjoy myself or carry on doing my current ones and get a job i probably wont like...? do what you like...especially if its just your bachelors...those pretty much all count the same anyway...you can always get a masters in something like business or whatever if decide to sell out

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What is the object of your worship? life i guess

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What's the best way to make friends on AB? honestly, kissing ass and never going against the flow...but do you really want friends like that

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If legal, do you think that Arnold Schwarzenegger would have been a good president? still could happen if the constitution is ammended...my gut response is no; however, and i dont know a ton about his tenure in california, but i dont absolutely hate everything ive heard about him...not a fan of the death penalty though

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Would you post a music video you really like? I'd love to see what others like to listen to. not my absolute favorite band, but def my fav video...ich will by rammstein

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Do you love or hate more? split straight down the middle...but im tryin to hate less

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Men, would you feel comfortable taking your wife's last name? Women, do you want to take your husband's last name? im generally for equal treatment, but this is one area where i feel conservative...i wouldnt really be upset if my wife didnt take my name, but i would prefer she did, and there is no way in hell i would take hers...just being honest...also, my kids would take my name, no hyphens

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Do you have a favorite substitute for a curse word (i.e. "shoot")? i dont sub out for curse words

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Did you have or were you the class clown? you bet i was

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Remember when the power button would actually turn a computer off? you mean like just now? hold it down for a few seconds...

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What do you think of the study (Catherine Mosher and Sharon Danoff-Burg) showing that men are more likely to give up a career for love and take longer to get over a lost love than women? i think it falls right in line with the general truth that men are less selfish than women

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Why do some women name your organ? because it deserves that kind of respect

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Hey guys! what do you think of women with facial hair? hey girls! its disgusting!

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If you could dedicate a song on the radio right now, what would it be and to who? dont stop believin to the bush administration

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What is a good name for a male siberian husky with ice blue eyes? pierce brosnan

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Is cruelty to animals referred to anywhere in the Bible as a sin? didnt god or jesus or somebody like turn into a bull once and then go have sex with a tree fairy or something? and then gods old lady got super pissed off...or was it jesus? i dont remember exactly, but does this answer your question at all?

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What exactly does a sugar buzz feel like? pokeball goooooooooo!

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What's your personal definition of "Beauty"? me me me me me me me me me MEEEEEEEE

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What is the first thing that come out from your brain if i say MUSLIM? candies

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I have been married before but did not belong to the church so was never sealed in the temple. My Fiance is Mormon would we be able to be sealed in the temple if i converted? the question is: why would you want to?

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After constant verbal abuse from the haters today, I find myself needing a hug or two. Would anyone like to supply me with said hug? i wouldnt hug you if it would cure my AIDS

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On a first date, what's one thing the other person could say that would make you bolt for the door? "i've got three of them."

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Why need to study? Want to have job or research? need study so dont sound like retard, like you

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Whats the worst thing you've ever done to somebody else? living or dead?

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What the hell is your problem? youre mah problem, dog

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What do you think of females who rarely wear make up? (Assuming they aren't 12 or anything.) well if they arent anything...then they dont exist, so i guess i dont have an opinion, other than that you pose odd questions about nobody

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Are you still looking for your dream home, or are you living in it? im living in wayland jennings' dream home...and when he comes back, boy is he in for a shock

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Who's wallet would you like to steal? yours...and im this close

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Do you think the charges filed against the senator from Idaho, although damning, are really just "small potatoes". i dont know about that, but i did hear that the senator has small potatoes himself, if you follow the vernacular

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Is it dust particles that we see when sunlight enters a dark room through a slit? no. its midiclorians, youd be able to feel them 24/7 if the force was stronger with you

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How did you get involved with your respective religions? Thank you. i kept an open mind. youre welcome.

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How does President Limbaugh sound? did he finally get elected president of the fat douchebag pundit society? boy will hannity and o'reilly be steamed...how does he sound? mostly like he has a mouth full of twinkies and a gut full of oxycodone most of the time

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Did you have a Fisher Price Power Wheels when you were a kid? What vehicle did you have? hell yes...it was a red jeep that for some reason had the pheonix graffics of a firebird on the hood, which was damned awesome

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What's your favorite kind of creamer for your coffee (Vanilla, Amaretto, Hazelnut....)? the king likes his coffee like he likes his women: strong and black

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How do you remove ticks from the dog? when ticks are burrowed in, they actually have a tube that lets them breathe out their asses...cover the entire tick with vaseline, which will suffocate it, forcing it to come up for air on its own, then just pluck it off

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Try to type your name with your elbows or any name jxmmnjd hey i was going for jzmmnjd, my cousin from the far east! not too shabby!

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What is an "ana bracelet"? if it has anything to do with the group of girls that turns anarexia into a club to get attention, then its a bracelet that signifies how retarded you are

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What’s worse for society potheads or drunks? if i can only make a choice between the two, definitely drunks...but i think there are many things worse for society than these things...like whatever is causing people to turn to drugs to make life livable for example, or politicians...

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Have you ever sat on an animal and rode it? is your mother an animal?

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For you, what is one sure fire way that you will get a head ache? (Loud noises, lectures, etc.) even hearing one bar of the bullshit that passes for music these days...also, the nagging of some shrew

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Why me? I mean seriously, why me? cuz you stink like a goats ass and your whining is insufferable

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Who is the absolute worst person we could elect to the US presidency in 2008? Why? probably hitler, i guess...or polpot...any of those assholes would be pretty bad

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What is a googleplex a google is a one followed by one hundred zeros...googleplex is a one followed by a google of zeros...in other words, humongous

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Who, what, when, where, how, and why? colonel mustard, a dead cat, one fortnight ago, the colonel's van, pretty much nonstop for a good hour, and only god knows

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What is your favorite music video? ich will by rammstein or possibly weapon of choice by fatboy slim

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What do you wish was sold in vending machines that isn't? even though i completely disagree with the old practice, and it doesnt exist anymore...id love to see the catholic church come out with vending machines that spit out indulgences...great question by the way

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Does anyone purchase non-laptop computers anymore? If so, why? the fact is nonlaptop computers still can give you way more computing power for less money...thats probably the reason why

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Have you noticed the 'evolution' in the American use of english where the 'ly' is dropped from adverbs..as in 'this tastes real(ly) good'..'I am real(ly)happy about that'...fresh(ly) made muffins here...etc? i guess so, but what i notice more is people who appear to think that grammar somehow says something about a person's intelligence, rather than how much they'be been educated(programmed)...shakespeare completely made up words, but he was considered such a genius that hundreds of his invented words were assimilated into the vernacular, instead of having a bunch of douchebags whine...

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Is a man's body sexy? mine sure is

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Is it just me or does it seem whenever we mormons have a church pot luck there seems to be more jello salads than main entrees or side dishes im giving you points for asking a funny question

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Do you think that using (quoting) scripture in a literal sense is effective in a rational argument? Why or why not? only if the person you're arguing with puts stock in scripture...a rational person wouldnt though...

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If Bugs Bunny and Mickey Mouse got into a fight, who would win? bugs...hes crafty

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Is Hitler passé? hitler is an asshole

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The smoking ban is picking up steam in the states, what are your thoughts on it? while i am generally a libertarian i am gonna have to ask to smokers who whine about their rights being trampled on if they ever thought about the rights of non-smokers to be able to take a breath without gagging on their regurgitated smog...at the same time its hard for me to get behind something that doesnt allow business owners the choice of how to run their businesses

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Wy wife recently got drunk and flirted with a guy she just met. They ended up sitting together. They held hands, he kissed her on the neck and he gave her "butterflies". My wife admits to being attracted to him. Did she cheat? Should I leave her? BULLSHIT QUESTION

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Can you put an automatic transmission into reverse when traveling forward? yep...not a good decision...did it one time

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What's something you know that others know little about? everything pretty much

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Who would win? Michael Vick or OJ Simpson? at what, distracting americans from stuff thats actually important? i guess OJ so far...especially since his books getting published

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What is your favorite Mexican food? una torta asada

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Is affirmative action fair? the way its meant to work, yes; the way it is often carried out, no

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Do you think that if the Aztec civilization had not been eradicated that it would be even more advanced than current western civilization? depends on what you mean by advanced...they wouldnt have needed medicine if westerners never came--at least not as quickly--because germs were wiped out by their ancestors crossing through northern asia...i doubt they would have been as industrialized either, but can you really call that advanced? production and advancement are not synonymns, no matter how much the powers that be want us to...

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Is your life acoustic or electric? my life cannot be defined by a single word...especially neither of those

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I discovered you telling me a lie. How do you react? angry that you didnt trust me enough to not investigate further

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What's the best cure for a broken heart? rubbing some vagisil on it and manning up

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Where did you lose your virginity? on top of a girl that looks like the one in the picture you swiped off the net to use as your avatar

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Are there any detrimental effects of slurping too much balloon helium? only if laughing too death is detrimental

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Do you think Americans should still be proud of who they are? sure, as long as its over each persons individual accomplishments and not over something ridiculous like which arbitrary, imaginary borders you were born between

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Why are Americans so proud of being American and think theyre better than everyone else...theyre just human beings....or are they? *looks suspicious* Im half American so dont think im being an a**! i think every country is full of people way to proud of something they were born into over luck...the difference is as americans, we actually get those people from each country in our face every day on our home turf. so what what do you expect? sure its a bunch of nonsense, but everybodys guilty, americas is (or at least was) on top for a while so of course all eyes are on us...but really look...

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What female vocalist do you think has the best singing voice and why? currently i have to give it to christina aguilera...although i pretty much hate her music

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What's the best thing to put PHILLY cream cheese on? the king of awesome

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What would you give to be on the Answerbag Top 5 of the Week list? the first week i ever used this site, i was # 6, and that was when everybody hated me...so i decided that instead of using it as much as i was, i would purposely never get that big on it every again. i got other shit to do

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Other than stinky mothballs what can you put in a closet to get rid of moths? r. kelly...from what i heard, hes already trapped in there, and if moths come along he will 'pull out his gun' from what i have heard in his documentaries

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How is click laminate flooring and beading laid? Is it easy to do? i couldnt tell you without showing you, but yes it is pretty easy

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Do you say "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays"? im really more of the "bah, humbug" type

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If you went completely color blind (everything went grey scale), and doctors told you they could restore one color to your sight, what would it be? burnt sienna...or maybe perriwinkle blue

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Do you believe it rare to find a wise teenager? i believe it rare to find a wise anybody

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Is there a frozen pizza that is really good? since the list of good ones is beyond the scope of this website's data capacity...i will respond by say are there any that aren't good?

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What's the most unusual D&D character you've ever created and been allowed to play? (Mine's a troll paladin, btw.) most unusual? i guess the one that leaves his moms basement and is able to get laid...

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Do you wish you could rate or downrate the things people say in real life like we do on AB? no...the ratings are just an add-on here...im pretty sure people in real life are much more put out than my middle finger than if i walked up and said "minus four, asshole" although now im inclined to walk up and say that without explaining

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How can a kid get $150 in a month without neighborly chores or asking their parents? by stealing something you can sell for 150$ once a month

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You are sitting on the roof with your significant other and there is a full moon out. They ask if you would like to howl at the moon with them. What would you do? anything to get them naked

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I just read this silly article that said that a woman should date a man who is 6 inches taller than her or it won't last. Do you think that's crazy or what? with how selfish everybody is these days...i thinks its ridiculous to believe any relationship will last

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What is the name of the closest restaurant to your home? some of my neighbors garbage cans yield some tasty morsels every now and again

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Does your face go red when you get embarrassed? Do people tell you it's going red? my face only goes red when I'm angry. my face is always red.

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If you could ask Jesus one question, what would you ask? "Why?" Seriously.

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Ladies (and perhaps men), What is your favorite brand of make-up? i dont wear any, but i prefer women who either wear none or at least dont cake it on

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Should women be allowed to participate in the Tour de France? i guess it will give the men some more people to beat, so sure

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Do you find it humbling or disgraceful when someone reveals personals issues in there life on AB? i think its a bummer that this is where folks need to go with their dirty laundry...if it works for them, great; but i hope they have somebody other than folks represented by puppets and hot air balloons and dogs with sunglasses, etc. to talk about their shit with

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When you reach with a disagreement or difficulty issues with another user on Answerbag, what are some ways to deal with the user without any arguments, fighting, etc? what? i live for the disagreements...why would you not want to deal with these people?

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Given that 99% of serial killers are average, middle class men, why is the fear of black crime so prevelant? i dunno man, but instead of trying to gain AB points for showing us how smart you are, why dont you go do something about it? i mean i get what your message is, but do you feel youre accomplishing anything here? go to the streets...

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Am I the only person who hates watching the news and seeing celebrities on? I like the news being for actual, well news. well then you certainly wont find anything worthwhile on tv...thats one thing the internet is good for, if you know where to look

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WOMEN: do you shave your legs/underarms ALL the time or only on special occasions? the kings body hair is as important as his crown in signifying him as a just and worthy ruler of awesome...no blade will ever touch my man forests

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What is, in your opinion, the greatest game for any console, any genre, year and anything else? can be muliple games, and why? contra for the original NES. undebatable

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In your lifetime, which American presidents have you approved of? i thought i approved of clinton...and i definitely approve of carter as an ex-president...but i would say for the most part they have sucked

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Do you prefer doing rather than thinking? sometimes

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Which one do you use more LOL or LMAO? neither...im a person, not a robot

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As human beings we are imperfect. Why then is there so much wrongful pride in the world? didnt you just answer your own question?

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Why do hunters call hunting a sport? The animals dont have high powered rifles, so where is the sport in that? im not really for hunting, but i was gonna try to give a serious answer to this, until i saw who asked it and realized anything i said would fall on deaf ears

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Where in South America and Mexico to Panama, can you consume marijuana and hallucinogenic plants or fungus legally? you can do anything in mexico if you got fifty bucks to bribe the federalis

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Would you be tested to be a liver donor for a person you do not know? There are many people who need just a portion of a liver to live. absolutely

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If Stableboy wrote a book about seeking inner peace and dealing with life would you buy it for $19.95? No, but I'd wish him luck with it.

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What is one thing that you should NOT delete from your computer? any of the stuff you want i guess

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Have you ever tried to quit doing something that you know its wrong but failed? (like drugs, smoking etc....) I tried to stop attracting so many women to me...but i just couldnt help myself

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What do you always keep with you wherever you go? Spectacles, testicles, wallet, and cellphone...not as catchy as watch once was, but cells have replaced watches

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On what road does true love travel? im guessing whatever that road in the game candy land is called

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How do i show my boyfriend that i am a changed person and that he can trust me if i have cheated on him? You can't.

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What are your thoughts when someone wears sunglasses inside? Only two kinds of people wear sunglasses inside: the blind and assholes

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Alot of women love Captain Jack Sparrow. Does this give hope to smelly drunks everywhere? god i hope so

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How do you develop will power? with a will power generator

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What is an egomaniac and why are they like that? Is it insecurity? my questions are way better than yours

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If you had to carry a self-defence weapon , what would be your choice? battle-axe...no hesitation

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Do you have someone that you could call...an idiot or some other normally insulting term in fun, and they don't get insulted because it's just how you two are with each other? (They could return the insult in the same way and you wouldn't get offended.) pretty much most of my friends have to be ready for this type of relationship

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Do you search or wait for the best parking spot, or does walking a few extra yards not bother you? i admit i drive to the nearest spots first, hoping. but from there i just keep going til i see an open one, and settle for whatever that may be

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Why is it that people that tease other people get mad when people tease them? cuz a lotta people cant take a joke...i love getting ripped on personally

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Whats your favorite thing to do on a tuesday? Masturbate i guess...

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What would be the wrong thing to say to someone in the next bathroom stall? Before you flush, let me see what color yours is.

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What is your favorite breed of cat? Hobbes

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Do you use humor as a defense mechanism? ALL the time

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Regarding the general atheistic mindset and philosophical belief systems of the individuals in the atheist group. Atheists, how do you define the word "Bacon" (WITHOUT looking that word up in a dictionary)? delicious...although im not an atheist

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Do you know any emotional vampires? People whose presence sucks all of your energy? absolutely...should be avoided at all costs...when i first heard of this concept i thought it was hippy nonsense, but the more you think on it, its amazing how true it is

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Have you ever hurt someone you bet

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I admit it, I am spoiled when it comes to some things. What is it that has made you spoiled in a certain way? i have been lucky in life, but i like to think i dont let it spoil me...if i had to pick one thing though, id have to say family...ive got a great family situation and i know thats not easy to come by

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How Do You Know If YourBoyfriend Loves You ? My Friend Wants To Know Might your 'friend's' name be Crystal B. Smallpiece?

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Are you sometimes ever tempted to say "lol" when speaking to people, instead of just laughing? no. and i want to hit people who do it

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This woman at work put a voodoo curse on me! Any way to get rid of it? nope. youre fucked

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Is there any science in Voodoo? Can a doll of a person really be used to hurt them? I guess you could hurt a person with a doll of them if you stick it in one of their holes hard enough

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I think I'm awesome. Do you think I'm awesome? (apparently some of you don't think so...) The king of awesome says youre a fucking dickbag...therefore you cant be awesome

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Have you ever used an outhouse? yes, but not the way it was intended...let that roll around in your mind for a while

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What would be the toughest sport to play naked? backwards sprints through cornfields

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Do you think men and women are treated differently in society? yes...sometimes its unjustified but other times it is...double standards exist because men and women are not equal...dont take that the wrong way; im not saying either is better than the other...but in general terms they are different enough to warrant different treatment

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What else do you put on your nachos besides cheese and monkey flesh? babies

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My bitch is about to have her puppies in about two weeks, and I'm starting to see milk come from her nipples. What does that mean? it means you need to smack your bitch up until she acts right

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Is it just me, or does the term "Homeland Security" sound an awful lot like "Fatherland Security"? are you kidding...the nazis were way more organized than anything under Bush

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My ex gf is really sad right now how can i help her with out interfering with the problem i need some help its your ex therefore its not your problem stay the hell away

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Whats the funniest name of a person you have met? my ex in back in high school worked for yearbook and the band directors name was Phil Ajarapu, and even if you called him Phillip, you wouldnt be helpin him out...hilarious

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Are you a lover or a hater? i love to hate

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How do you get over someone rather quickly other than finding someone new? slash the tires on their car

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If my mom says i have to wait untill im more mature to date, what do i do????? date anyway...your mom is a liar

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Have you ever stopped to think? never...time is money...the train is leaving the station...all we have is the present, dont let it become the past...

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Estimate 10^0.1 without using a calculator. How many digits can you get? Show me your working. yes i definitely came on this site to do some math problems...what the hell is going on with you people?

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Do you think it's intriguing if a girl can put her whole fist in her mouth? why? stuff in a girls mouth = sexy ...this equation holds true always except in the case of poop or something like that

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Would it hurt your feelings if your significant other or your parents were asked who is the most important person in their life and they didn't say you? wouldnt happen

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I love reading autobiographies. Can you recommend one? malcolm x (as told to alex haley)...it will piss you off and make you think

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What do you think of STYX? I think it is a bunch of whiny sissy rock, and yet i friggin love it

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How do you laugh? What does it sound like? I have an old-timey villain laugh...think snidely whiplash

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Richard Dawkins is my hero, is he your's? nah...i mostly worship patrick duffy

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I am new to answerbag,does anyone have any pointers? do whatever the hell you want and dont take shit from any holier-than-thou douchebags

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Have you noticed that the quality of Bugles, in reference to space to put your fingers in, has really gone down hill? actually, i ate some the other day and they were as fantastic as ever; however, i can see where if this trend were to show itself it would be frustrating as hell and i hope you are only experiencing a fluke

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Does anyone have any information on Canadian actor Frank Chiesaruin? im sure somebody does, yes

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My brother and i like the same girl wat do we do cage fight

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What will be the most likely cause of the destruction of our civilization? rosie o'donnell

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When signing up for google adsense, is it better to set up a new google account primarily for adsense, or is it ok to just use my current google account? Will there be too much clutter? wish i could help you with your question but i gotta give a plus rating to anybody with a spaceman spiff avatar

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Would you still love your son..if he grew up to be like Jeffrey Dahmer or Ted Bundy? nothing would make me prouder

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Im a fan of the american band LIVE but how do you pronounce it? you pronounce it live

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What are the things that the Bible shows us that God hates? I am pretty sure god doesnt actually hate anything...whatever asshole wrote leviticus seems to think he hates a bunch of stuff, but then i hate the asshole that wrote leviticus, so there you go

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Do you think I should get married in Vegas? abso-fucking-lutely

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What drink is your personality most like? whichever drink thinks this question is kinda retarded

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If you could make something out of the Geico Gecko, what would it be? ass floss

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If your were fashion police what would be illegal? clothes that cost more than thirty bucks

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How long to your birthday? 13 days, and its the big deuce-deuce

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What's the most dangerous sport? fucking with the king

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What three words do you want your lover to say to you? I'm not pregnant

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What's the secret? some seriously retarded shit, and i know that will get me downpointed by all you robbines mongers but i dont care because you all are worse than scientologists

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Why is poligamy illegal? because women do not intend to share a man once theyve imprisoned him

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What do you think is the best book of all time? now you asked for best book, not favorite book so im going either catch-22 by heller or gullivers travels by swift, unless you count plays because then shakespeares hamlet--as played out as it is--has to take the crown

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What is the most boring book you have ever read? ethan frome was pretty unbearable

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You know, I've never done Cocaine, but I've always been curious what it's like. Anyone care to share? shit no, get your own.

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If your surname were embarrassing and you were teased as a child by others, would you change it for your children's sake or make them bear the taunts as you had to do? I have trained my children in six forms of unarmed combat as well as two forms of armed combat...nobody will ever taunt them more than once...about anything

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My daughter is 14 and this kid in her high school is 18 and he asked her to the Prom.Am I being to protective by not letting her go or is this feeling of reluctance normal due to the age difference?Please someone help me out with this Just Curious. the kid wants to have sex with her. guaranteed. normally im for letting kids make their own mistakes, but you made the right choice in this case.

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Has anyone attended a University of California school? If so, which did you attend, and what did you think? I'm considering UC San Diego, UC Berkeley, and UCLA. my cousins wife went to UCSD for education and loved the hell out of it...plus San Diego is probably the third coolest city in the US (behind New Orleans and Chicago)

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I have a whole night shift ahead of me, but I am already starting to get sleepy. Any tips to stay awake for another 8 hours? It's a computer/phone job. (Humour welcome!) its a computer job? damn, if you can get away with it, pop in a dvd...so some more ABing, maybe read some newspapers online...if you have a computer in front of you the skies the limit.

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How many identities do you think some AB members have? Some people I believe must have at least three or four. Thoughts? i dunno...i think more than a few have multiples so they can plus their own accounts up continuously as well as some people use them to troll their balls off...both are pretty lame...on a side note, lots of people thought me and chass master ninja were the same guy, but its really just my brother. we have similar senses of humor and that gets people thinking.

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When was the last time you saw your dad? right before i closed the trunk...

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How many books do you have that are written by the same author? Who is the author and what is your favorite book? I have Shakespeares complete works as well as nearly all of vonneguts stuff...i forget how many are in each...also i own the entire series(ten issues) of transmetropolitan written by warren ellis and illustrated by darrick robertson...of the three authors, vonnegut is my favorite and its a dead heat among breakfast of champions, slaughterhouse 5, and cats cradle, but if i were pressed to choose...

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Who do you think is a better singer Christina Aguilera or Britney Spears? I didnt know britney spears was a singer...Christina is not even close to being a performer I generally enjoy but nobody can deny thats shes got pipes

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Will babies and young children be taken in the Rapture? yeah, by me

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How to beat traffic ticket california vehicle code 21460(a)? I dont know a thing about that particular violation but fight the power!

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What is the best thing you have ever bought? just bought an 07 yamaha FX cruiser high output waverunner and i havent shut my mouth about it yet because it is goddammed AWESOME

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What is your biggest fear and have you attempted conquering it? Success or Failure? I wouldve said heights but ive realized that I am most afraid of hurting/killing a family member because of something like a driving accident or something like that

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Where do we fine the other apostles? probably in one of the lower courts

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Is it ok to steal food if you are hungry and you are poor absolutely

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Which sport makes the female body look most attractive? naked mud wrestling

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Since Beggin Strips aren't made from Bacon, does that make it kosher for Jewish people's dogs to eat? since the dog isnt jewish...yes

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DO you have any Long stories about snakes? yes.

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Where does Victoria Beckham buy her clothes? who gives a shit?

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Do dingos really eat babies? im not sure if im a dingo or not, but if i am, then yes

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Are you a Democrat or Republican? Why are you what you are? neither...they both disappoint me to no end

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What food would you totally pig out on? baby

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How can salvation be not of works when faith is required? Isn't believing a work? hey! whats with all this free thinking on here today? you do as the priest tells you...no questions!

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Are you superfly or a superfreak? def a superfly but always on the lookout for a superfreak or two

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I just have to ask, if there is only one Spirit, then how is that Spirit called God split into three separate persons... Cause then you have Three little Gods who make up God... careful now...thats dangerous thinking and the church dont appreciate that type of dangerous thinking, what with the house of cards already poised to come down and all...

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I need help deciding if I should have my kittens declawed. I've always felt it was wrong but I can't seem to break the kittens from clawing on my couches. I have a cat tree, actually 2 of them, that they play on but they still scratch the furniture. help have you tried covering all their claws in duct tape...that usually takes the fight outta them

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Who's Your Favorite Food Product Mascot? not sure if it counts but i would have to say this guy...

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Whats your 'morning hair' like... pretty cool or hideous troll? when you get buzzed every three weeks your morning hair doesnt differ a whole bunch from your night hair

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I feed my 6 month old kitten one can of wet food a day and leave dry food out all day. Is that too much food? How much should I be feeding her? i forcefeed all my cats 2 sticks of butter a day until they hit fighting weight

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If you are a man, have you ever had a hard-on when your female doctor gave you the physical? you need to go buy a porno i think...im minusing you again because your questions are still retarded

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Do you prefer using a charcoal barbeque or a gas barbeque, and why? I prefer charcoal, you cant beat its authenticity and im always a sucker for the old-school...that being said, i love my gas grill for the fact that i can be eating barbecued hot dogs in ten minutes of craving them

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Which kids show do you hate with a passion and wish you could just punch the creators out for making it in the first place? teletubbies...and when im done punching the creators id do it...AGAIN! AGAIN!

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What song best sums up your view of the world today? its not easy being green by kermit the frog

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If you are a female nudist, have you ever come across a situation at a nudist resort whereby a male nudist stared at your voluptuous body with lust? How did you deal with such a situation? stupid question...i am the one that minused you

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What is the difference between a burrito, taquito, and a chimichanga? chimichanga is a fried burrito and a taquito is something else altogether, and smaller than the other two

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What's your favorite single line from a poem or song lyric? "Cuando despertó, el dinosaurio todavía estaba allí. " monterroso its actually the whole poem...you kinda need to know spanish because a translation isnt really possible, which is why the line is so cool...if you put it into a web translator you will not get the full effect either

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If you're sitting at a desk, open the top drawer. What's something in your drawer that probably shouldn't be? my unlicensed, loaded .45

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Why are plant extracts so popular? probably for the same reason snake oil was...

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Which do you perfer, Pizza or hamburgers? i love to grill and all, but pizza is numero uno

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Have you ever failed a grade/class in school? no, but many grades/classes failed me

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I have just watched a tv programme about tracking devices for children. It said there was an argument for implanting them under the skin. Given the recent kidnapping of Madeleine McCan, do you think an under-the-skin device for children is a good idea? no. people for this thing will always try to employ pathos to sell this big brother enabling nonsense...we are already too easy to track down if somebody wants. why make it easier? a million kidnapped children are not worth being tagged like animals

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Doobie Brothers or Creedence Clearwater Revival? revival all the way

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When you are building a relationship or friendship with someone, if you discover something extremely disappointing, would it make you reassess that person...slow down..rethink the budding friendship? everyones going to disappoint you eventually...even your closest friend, better not to dwell on it or it will be a lonely existance

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How do you reward yourself? A glass of wine with dinner, a bowl of ice cream in the evening...the purchase of a book occasionally? i just rewarded myself with a waverunner, and its fucking awesome

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Spend Billions on missiles or spend billions exploring space? if i have to choose one of the two i guess space...at least stephen hawking has my back that way...i think both are stupid though

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Would you choose not to date someone who didn't know the difference between your and you're? you're standards are too high; id say your being ridiculous...although i have too say two you, to many times i have been the same way

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Can I get a high five? sure can...up top

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What would happen if I disconnected my iPod from the USB port without first pressing the eject/disconnect symbol? honestly, probably nothing...from personal experience no USB device has ever been damaged by this...still the manufacturers advise against it, so why tempt fate?

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Where was the highest temperature ever recorded in US history and what was the record? well im sure somebody will actually look it up but ima do by best at guessin from what ive heard...i think its in death valley and it was somewhere near 140

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Mac & Cheese or Mashed Potatoes? if its outta the blue box and just the way my mama makes, mac and cheese any day; but if its any other, gotta go with the taters

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Hi hello(says in interesting animated voice). I'm watching a movie tonight. Are you? lol. What are you watching? you are a psychopath

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From now on my job will be to flag answers,and questions that does not make any sence or are offensive.Are you ok with that? Do what you gotta do, i guess...but that is the lamest calling in the history of callings...as far as callings go, jesus is the top of the spectrum with his charge to save humanity...and you are his total opposite, at the very lowest, right below mtv VJs and dutch transvestite prostitutes

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Is it important to you to be first to see a movie or buy a long-awaited book or are you fine with waiting till all the hype settles? i do like to see a movie with a crowd of people who havent seen it yet...also seeing it or reading a book right away means no jackasses will ruin the ending...i never have watched sixth sense because the ending was ruined for me, same with seven...i dont catch stuff early just to say i did though, nor will i camp out for stuff or pay extra

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Is it right that a Muslim who converts to Christianity be sentenced to death? i could easily see both sides of this argument...

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How can i date a girl while my parents disapprove? umm pretty easily...also tell her that you parents disapprove, chicks are turned on by danger

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Which language is the easiest for a Swede to learn, Spanish, French or German? with all the free time swedes have because they dont do anything useful, learning any language should be a breeze

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When i was little and it thundered and lightened i was really scared,to allay my fears my mum would say "the lightening is god turning his lights on and the thunder was god putting coal on his fire".What things were you told to stop you being scared. When something frightened me, mom would pick me up by the ankles, my dad would say to hike up my skirt and be a man while gramma whipped me with a wooden spoon and called me a pussy...needless to say, nothing scares me anymore, because gramma is dead

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What matters the most, the journey or the destination? i know you want some overblown philosophical thing about the hunt being more fun than the kill, but when i fly to vegas, i hate the flight...but i love vegas, so im goin destination

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What is the worst part about hell? that it doesnt exist, yet still frightens people here in the real world into doing what religious hierarchies tell them

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How do I stop someone from cutting themselves, when they refuse to listen to me about it because they have convinced themselves what they are doing doesn't matter and it is cool, because they want to be an emo? stop giving them attention entirely...thats all a cutter wants. stop paying attention and the cutting will stop. guaranteed

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Do you drink alcohol to get drunk? no. i drink it to take the edge off. and i can quit whenever i feel like it, no matter what charlene says...

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How should I catch a star? Is jessie camp still considered a star? i cought him in a big net...

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Once I found an insect in northern California that looked kind of like a bee, but it had no wings or stinger and was about 2 inches long. What could it be? I pull the wings off of every insect i capture and i have been to california...that could be it

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I want to get my fiance something very special for our anniversary. Any suggestions? cleveland steamers are timeless yet unrefined

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When you get in a fight with your partner, are you always the one to say sorry even if it's not your fault? or do you wait for them to apologize the antecedent 'partner' is cingular, yet later you use the plural pronoun 'them'...i am too confused to answer

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What is the best way to die? in battle, driving a GTO over a ramp hitting the top of a brick wall so i go flying out the windshield, straight at my mortal enemy with a trident pointed at his/her crotch...the force will cause both of us to be impaled against a wall covered in spikes but the last thing the prick/bitch will see before death is my smiling, psychotic face (also the ninja turtles will be wailing on electric...

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Why is the earth round? as an affront to god and his infallible pope who was so sure it was flat

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When do you know it's time to finally give up? When the other person has finally ceded the battle to me

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What's the wildest thing you've ever done? to a person? to an animal? to myself? to a jar of peanut butter? be specific, there are so many possibilities equally deserving of their own answers, yet so numerous that they cannot all be addressed here

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In the Bible, what does it mean when it refers to the moon as “A faithful witness”? it means the moon is actually alive and watching you all the time...this was before it became what we all know today as santa clause, hence connecting the christian tradition with the jolly fat man, explaining his arrival at christmas

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If bacon were to be outlawed, would you smuggle it in from another place? Bonus points if you explain how you would smuggle it. I would just open a fake adoption center and turn the children into bacon...baby bacon bootlegging...the alliteration writes itself

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Do you work on Sundays? the king toils not on the sabbath

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Quick: Someone says "New Mexico", what do you think of? whats wrong with the old one?

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Why are the abstract paintings of Jackson Pollock so valuable when they look like nothing but splattered paint? because jackasses are willing to pay it...money itself holds no intrinsic value since we went off the gold standard...things are only worth what you believe they are...no more, no less

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Who married Adam and Eve? nobody...we're all bastards...the only way to salvation is to do everything a priest tells you and give all your money to the church tax-free...so sayeth the lord

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Has this AB scene gotten all to silly yet? yes...just then when you called it a 'scene'

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If we all had to use a screen name with the word "bacon" in it, what would yours be? makin bacon with the king

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What words of comfort would you have for a dying person? those are sweet shoes, what size are you?

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I'm from the U.S. and am considering visiting Brazil next summer... Do you have any helpful tips or suggestions? learn portuguese...dont get into any unlicensed cabs, yes it was a joke on the simpsons, but it is a good tip nonetheless

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Anyone else here find bacon quite disgusting, or am I alone in this regard? bacon is delicious

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Is it possible to love Nelson TOO much? nelson is undeserving of love...

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Who's going to be the first to let out the ending of the new Harry Potter book on here? Bet you there's some meanie !! who cares? harry potter is a punk-ass who felches with dumbledore...go star wars

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Fans of South Park: Turd Sandwich or Giant Douche? youre both

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Are you always your self? nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo im not....but yeessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss i am....pudding

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Does this make me nuts and are you going to do it too? I ordered "HP & the Deathly Hallows" and I plan on doing nothing that weekend but wait for and read the book. snape is harrys father who actually escaped the attack...there i saved you some time

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Something you accidentally sucked into the vacuum cleaner? my dogs nuts...wasnt so much an accident as it was an experiment...my hypothesis was, in fact, supported

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Is the U.S. ready for a female president? i dont know...she might menstruate all over some important legislation

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Am I the only person on here who likes South Park? no...youre just the only one that wont shut their goddamned mouth about it

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Is anyone a mentor for children? Im doing a 5 page report and need sources, like interviews maybe books, can anyone help? Have you ever seen the kurt russel movie soldier? I have adopted about ten boys and put them through a training program like in that film...it is outstanding for the survivors.

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What was the last non-fiction book that you have read? autobiography of malcolm x...awesome

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I have ricotta cheese left over from making lasagne. What else should I make with it? Any suggestions? how about a sand castle?

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Is your cat as spastic and crazy as mine? my cat isnt anything any more...i slammed it into my piano...the musical chord created by the keys and the cat meowing could not have been recorded by the likes of mozart

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Who likes hot roast pork sandwiches with mashed potatoes, stuffing, and gravy? this motherfucker sure does

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Those from California, does anyone have a good El Niño storm story? im from LA and El Nino actually created wind so hard it blew the herpes off my balls

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What's a way to get my dog to stop barking anytime someone gets near the house or even just walks by? beat it to death...give michael vick a call, he will take it off your hands

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I bought a new memory stick that says compatible with psp and I put the memorystick in the PSP and the screen turns black and many other colors. I can still hear the screen when I move from left to righ go to a retard school

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It's Jodie44's birthday! Who would like to join me in wishing her a wonderful birthday? nope

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Are you eating breakfast every morning? yes and i do it in front of starving children

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What food item doesn't freeze well? In my experience, cooked potato doesn't freeze well, and also hard boiled eggs--the albumin becomes hard as rubber. live baby...it always fights at first

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How do I add other users to my friends list? stop being lame

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Which 'Friends' character would you most like to punch? any of the women (which includes ross)

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What's your least favorite part about going to the doctor (I hate strep tests)? never been a big finger in the ass type of guy...although when i was sick my doctor would always make me do the pants around the ankles dance and he would make me look for his contact he dropped while he would not even help...hed just watch

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When you were denied a legitimate health insurance claim, what was the impact on you and your loved ones? well, whenever things go wrong, i usually kinda black out, and when i come too, everybody is on the ground crying...so i guess they didnt enjoy it so much

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What is the best position and implement for a punishment spanking? i prefer them to be running by, it makes it more of a challenge...as far as implement goes, i guess anything laying around is fine, i bored a few holes into a canoe paddle to lessen the amount of air resistance...granted that takes off some of the momentum created by mass, but you easily make up for it in velocity. "wham, bang, right to the moon"

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Cannabis, caffeine, or alcohol? the king + beer = happiness

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I don't really care if my glass is 1/2 full or 1/2 empty - I'm just happy to have a glass (Joe Farrell). What is your opinion? HOWD HE GET A GLASS. I WANT ALL THE GLASSES. AND I WANT EVERY ONE OF THEM FULL TO THE BRIM. AND I WONT STOP SCREAMING OR BITCHING UNTIL IT IS MADE SO

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How do I tell my parents about me being a Satanist? Just tell them you found a new fad to occupy yourself with and you will stop when you find a new way to get attention...by the way, dont forget to feed your pet tarantula.

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If you were stranded on a desert island, which would you rather have: a slot machine, a boomerang, or a bottle of personal lubricant? slot machines pointless, and i can live without the lube...boomerang time!

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Lipgloss or lipstick lipsticks harder to wipe off my crotch

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Who's has a bigger butt, Beyonce Knowles or Jennifer Lopez either way...jessica biel's got them both beat...go white girls!

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Which of these recently banned dogs in Ireland do you think is actually a nice pet ? English Bull Terrier, Staffordshire Bull Terrier, American Pit Bull Terrier, Rottweiler, German Shepherd (Alsatian), Doberman, Rhodesian Ridgeback, Japanese Akita, Bull M German shepherds rock

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When was the last time you read a Mad magazine? I actually just picked one up the other day because i was feeling nostalgic and boy have they dropped the ball since i was younger...boy was i disappointed

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Would you run with the Bulls in Spain? I would not run, I would turn and fight...and conquer.

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What ever happened to violence is NOT the answer? Shut up with this hippie crap or I will punch you in the kneecap.

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Is anyone else out there having a super bad day? nope! im gettin a waverunner!

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Strawberries or cherries? Definitely strawberries, unless they have something to do with that insipid strawberry shortcake cartoon...not only are the berries the right answer, but anybody who puts cherries should be burned at the stake.

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What's the most idiotic thing you've ever heard? "I'm the decider." Or was that the scariest?

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Snickers or milky way? I believe this should answer your question...

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How big is asia? asia comprises about thirty percent of the land surface of earth...saw it on a quiz show the other day

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Do your feet smell? yes, and my nose runs...the irony is ridiculous

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What is the first thing you reach for when you wake up in the morning? a fifth of jack to take the edge off

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Donald duck or daffy duck? both are great, but i gotta go with daffy...DUCK SEASON!

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"Any man has a chance to sweep any woman off her feet. They just need the right broom." -Will Smith/Alex Hitchins, from the movie Hitch. Do you believe this quote? Why? no...first, it is retarded; second, women want money and attention, if you cant provide lots of those, no broom in the world will do it for you

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Is personality inversely proportional to looks? nope...ive seen lots of fat, ugly girls with fat, ugly personalities...its a damned catastrophe when that happens, which is all too often

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There is a change machine in our building, for washing clothes. It just ate $5. The building managers say it is the change machine owner's problem, not theirs. There is no number or contact information on the machine. What would you do? grab my baseball bat and make a withdrawal from my cache of bricks in the back yard

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Why do I always think of the perfect thing to say after the chance to say it has gone? because youre slow

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If you were young and extremely athletic would you rather be a professional player in baseball, basketball, football, soccer, golf , rugby, or tennis? my heart says rugby because i love playing it, but my head says tennis because theres tons of money, youre world renowned, few injuries and career longevity is through the roof

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What lyrics from a song do you relate to the most? cop killa by ice t

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If you were on a first date and your date mentioned that they were on AnswerBag would you let them know that you were also a member right away? Would you tell them your screen name? umm if my first date led into a discussion about answerbag i would figure that things are fucked at this point anyway

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Someone once told me that if a dog gets the taste of human blood he will want it all the time and try to get it. I think this is nonsense. What do you think? it is an overstatement, however when a dog bites a person and gets a taste of human flesh it does change the dog in a way that makes it more prone to biting people

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Who is the best singer ever? Mi mi mi miiiiii.

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Where does the king go when hes not here in public? The king generally retreats to his summer home in Wisconsin

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Why are some people so thoughtless and self centred? youre right...i am pretty awesome

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What's your number one fashion rule? not to give a fuck about what people think about what im wearing

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Three words after sex, what would you say? I've got herpes.

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How would you feel if your best friend didn't invite you to his/her wedding? I would feel like it was time to crash/completely ruin a wedding.

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How would you like to die? As violently and as much in the public eye as possible...also for a cause hopefully, but not necessarily

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Do you think Hollywood celebrities are getting less and less worthy of admiration? Is it possible to become less worthy than not at all? I guess maybe the fact that they owe us admiration for allowing them to leech lives of luxury off our retarded masses...

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Avril Lavigne likened herself to a modern day Sid Vicious. What might she be suffering from? retardation and crabs and retarded crabs

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Do you think David Beckham can make soccer the number 1 sport in the US? If he was that fun to watch, we'd have watched him play for England on TV...soccer sucks and america will never care about it...on a side not, the Beckham's suck and i envy england for being rid of them...thats what we get for dumping madonna on the british

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What are some songs NOT to play while making love? i think YMCA or the Hokey Pokey would both suck pretty bad

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Would you shake hands with President George W. Bush --? abso-motherf***in-lutely not

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Is a crocodile a mammal? of course it is...what? you cant see all that lush, thick fur all over its not at all scaly body? and those eggs it lays, totally indicative of being a mammal...whats scary is how like us they really are

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Why does Society put so much emphasis on knowledge and too little on wisdom? because they are frightened of the kings raw, unbridled mindpower

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Did we really come from monkies or is that a scientific fluke? of course we did; what you think somebody just put us here?

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Do you like visiting people in the hospital --? only if im the one that put them there, but then its just to gloat

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What is the most powerful handgun in the world? a lot of people are saying that its the Dessert Eagle and stuff...im positive there are handguns that actually fire rifle rounds, but i dont know the brand

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If you could have the world's largest collection of ONE thing, what would you choose? babes

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Cappacino or Frappacino? black goddammed coffee...no cinos or essos or macchiatos or ventis or any of that bullshit for the king

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I listen to metal, punk rock, emo, and hardcore..is this intimidating to guys or something? Is it making me come off as too hard maybe? I dont get it.. my guess is youre trying to come off as too hard, ive never seen a girls musical taste ruin her ability to get guys

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How many fluid ounces are there in a shot? depends on the shot...usually one to two

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When are you supposed to use the word affect and effect properly in a sentence? this isnt the exact definitions, but effect is usually the noun and affect is usually the verb

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What is the most ROMANTIC thing that anyone has ever done for you? my first hummer was pretty great

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Do you think myspace.com/tylerwilliams32 is a good site? no...it sucks and i encourage everybody to boycott it

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Which movie would you refuse to see/watch? gay porn i guess...nothing against those guys, but im just not the least bit interested in their product

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DO you have any funny habits that you cant stop? always shower after a poop

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Would you just show up at someones door unannounced? Why would the king do that when he has perfectly good heralds all over the place?

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What NOT to say when being interviewed for a mortuary assistant post? (i am applying for this job!) so do i need to use a condom, or do their diseases die with them?

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Why don't the front doors in America have letter boxes (letter slots I think you call them), why are they away from the house so you have to go outside? (especially in the winter) my MAILbox is right next to my door

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What makes a good parent? striking fear into the hearts of children, your own or otherwise

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My dog found a baby bunny nest in my yard. I put a fence around the nest so that my dog can't get to it, but the Mom can. At what age do the babies leave the nest? if your dog found it, it should be up the dog whether he eats the bunnies or not, finders keepers...stop playing god

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Have you ever had a baby sitter cancel at the last second? only because she found out i didnt actually have any kids

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Adam Sandler. The funniest person ever, a desperate looser, or neither? neither?

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How come the peaple who work in hospitals rarely get sick? if all the true-to-life medical shows i see on tv are accurate, its because theyre all too busy fucking each other

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At what age did you say your first bad word? as soon as i could talk...my rents didnt hold back

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Would you die for your flag? Would you die for your nation? die for a piece of cloth? absurd...dieing for my nation is a loaded concept, if you mean die so others may live, absolutely; die for W in his nonsense war? f*** no

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Have you ever ran outside to get the newspaper naked? i run outside naked. period.

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What do you think of Russia being awarded the 2014 Winter Olympic Games? "so that boring shits going down in russia, huh?"

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What kind of store do you like the best? i have a store of weaponry and black powder in every embankment of my castle...those are my favorite

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What's the big deal about the United States flag, anyway? whats the big deal with any flag? as an american living in chicago, i see more polish and mexican flags than anything, i like this place, and my flag is a symbol of it...no big deal really

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What type of government would you be most comfortable with? Anything that varies from a monarchy headed by myself is no good...to honestly answer though, the best form of government would truly be no gov't at all...but, since we cant have people running wild, i would say ideally a monarchy with a just king or queen would be best, just being the operative word, less legislators means swifter action and less vulnerability to infiltration from...

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Who else thinks "The King of Awesome ABFB" is hilarious? He's pretty much the greatest thing to ever happen to this place...modest too...

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Do real men meditate? only when theyre taking a dump

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Does anyone want computer problems awnsering? just ask me i know a hell of a lot Does anyone want grammar or spelling problems awnsering? It will help the ethos of anybody trying to sound like an authority on anything if they are good at them...

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What is your favorite ice cream flavor? straight vanilla...blue bunny vanilla is unbeatable

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What will you have in your omelet? everything...and extra jalapenos if you got'm

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How do you celebrate? pancakes, beer, and bitches

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Would most guys punch a guy making sexual comments about their GF? depends on the person...certain friends are allowed, but then i also have a 'smack fools upside the head just for livin' policy, so anybody might catch a beatin at any time really

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When people say to you "Can I ask you one question?", do you have a strong urge to count that as their one question and tell them so? Not only do i count it, i punch them in the clavicle for not waiting until i acknowledged their right to ask.

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Who is going to celebrate the day America made England its bitch? really, this is just the day america decided to give it a shot...still i enjoy the spirit of the question...and the king will celebrate indeed

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When do you think George Clooney will come out of the closet? I guess when hot chicks stop boning him

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If you were stranded on a deserted island and you could only have 3 foods for the rest of your life, what would they be? (meals such as fajitas could count as one food) chicken kabobs, grilled pineapple, and tortas asadas

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Who likes boobs? the king is an admirer of the mammary glands

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Would you sell your genitals for 2 million dollars? Why/Why not? the whole point of money is to lure the opposite sex toward your genitals, so whats the point of having the two mil?

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How come it always rains on the 4th of July? just to spite you

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My bf's feet are really gross and they smell sometimes...I really just want to give him a pumus stone for his feet!!! I love him to death but how to I hint that he needs to take better care of his feet? all these cosmo and maxim magazines have everybody convinced theres gentle nagging ways to do everything without hurting feelings...people arent stupid...just be direct but dont insult, for christ sake why is everybody so passive all the time?

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Do you feel really guilty when you tell lies? Even little white ones? why have they gotta be white? and why does everyone believe the white ones are little? why is it always about race?

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My boyfriend doesn't like chocolate very much... i want to bake him something [like cookies]... any suggestions? sure...any of the thousands of desserts that dont have chocolate in them...

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Why do men freak out when women with long hair chop it all off? cuz long hair looks great...i mean its your hair i guess, but why ruin a good thing?

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Procrastination: A bad thing or a good thing? ill tell you later...

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Would you rather fight a vampire, werewolf, 10 zombies, or Chuck Norris? if chuck norris is around, and you have kept him properly appeased, you wont have to fight anything, but merely watch in amazement as norris kills them all with his beard muscles

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Quick rich scheam: what would you do to get rich fast? get into chicago politics

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My boyfriend has been acting really wierd since he got bak from a camping trip he doesnt kiss or hug me anymore i need to know wut u guys think wut is the only reason u would stop showing ur girl u care and ignore her instead plz answer quick i need help sounds like the camping trip may have gotten a little brokeback...

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Tennessee beer sales require ID no matter how old you look. Do you think other states should adopt this rule? i think beer sales should occur all the time without any IDs...im sick of kids pestering me to buy them beer...sure i make like ten bucks, but its a hassle i could live without

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What's the biggest difference between you and your significant other? i exist

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The number of juvenile females arrested for Violent Crime Index offenses has increased 25 percent over the previous five-year period, with no increase in arrests of male juveniles for the same offenses. Whats happening to the young women in our Society? quite simply, the girls have gone wild...i believe that there are documentaries about this

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Does anyone want to go fishing? with every inch of my body...but the lund is up in the kingdom of Wisconsin, along with my fluegger rod and my calcutta 400...but how the walleye do call

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Do you vote based on your social beliefs or your economic beliefs? I vote based on the big picture...single issue voting is friggin ridiculous; its why we have bush ('he loves jesus too! hes got my vote; i dont care about nothin else') social issues only matter to me in the sense that the government should not be telling people how to live their lives...yes laws are important in their own way...but not laws on marriage and whatnot; they are...

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Is it okay to feed my bunny romain lettuce? my guess is that its fine, but theres no real nutrients in romain lettucs...its basically like water in veggie form, you may wanna check into some other foods

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What type of music can you absolutely not stand? pop...almost anything on the radio...fergie comes to mind...she is actually making america dumber

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Do you agree with the theory that modern homo sapiens all came from Africa? absolutely

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I just lost a friend to drowning. Some folks have said they've 'heard' that's the EASY way to go?Can't imagine panic,lifeB4eyes,succumbing..being EASY. Any1 been there?@back from water?He will be missed. I will say this...im sorry for the loss first of all...drowning obviously kills by suffocation; i have heard that you actually pass out before you go, rather than feel pain, unlike with some gunshot wounds, falling, poison, terminal diseases or other types of deaths...so while im sure its frightening, im guessing its not as bad as some others

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Imagine you are floating gently on a boat amongst turquoise waters. You sip a fruity, colourful drink. What would spoil the scene? Its already spoiled by the fact that my cold, frosty beer has somehow turned into a wuss drink.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how resistant are you to physical pain? ive been concussed, beaten, tackled, and all sorts of things, and i havent had a problem so far

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What the hell is up with all the atheist questions? the same thing thats up with all the religious question marathons...fanatics

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Who wants to lynch an atheist tonite? only if the atheist is you, dipshit

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How well do you tolerate people of diametrically opposed viewpoints? if they can defend their points well, i can usually tolerate them...if they are dumbasses who just rant without knowing a damn thing about it, i verbally assault them with the truth

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Why isn't there a slang or derogatory name for atheists yet? most atheists love attention for being atheist, so why give them the satisfaction?

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What is the most controversial question you can think of that will spark debate and deep thought? What exactly are all those (insert ethnic group, gender, sexual persuasion) so pissed off about?

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Who was the youngest man to serve as a US President? i thought it was JFK...but i could be wrong

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Has you ever been called a slang or derogatory name, due to your skin color, religion or ethnic origin? What did you do? some black guys were makin fun of how i talked once because they didnt realize i was still around...honestly, i would of hit them if there were only two or one, but there were like four so i walked away...i told a friend of mine(who is black--and no i dont call him 'my black friend') and he gave me a hug...it became amusing

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What do you feel about guys who wear pink? you mean imperial gangstas?

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What Would Buddha Do? from the looks of things, grab another donut

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What do you think about Banning the "N" word? banning any word is an infringement of basic human rights, which is more offensive than any one word

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If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family? the king of awesome has absolutely no idea what you are talking about

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Why does it take 9 months to develope a human baby when cats only take 2 months? Because the average human is four and a half times smarter than a cat

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Men say that they like a classy poise women then why do they always date the rude and trashy over the classy? i guess the same reason women claim to like a sense of humor then date assholes with money and cars

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If you could do anything to cause mass hysteria what would you do? command an army of robotic squids...isnt this a bit obvious?

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Found this in a book - " when we have completed our study of One we think we know all about Two because Two is simply One and One - But we forget we still have to make a study of "and" --- can someone explain? somebody thought they were being really clever...my guess is whoever thought that up sits around and thinks alot but never actually 'does'

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What truths do you believe are Absolute? the rich get richer

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Is there truly an answer for every question? ...

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Are there any cultural customs from another country that you think your country should adopt? france's health care system and japans education system come to mind

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Does corey feldman rule or what? of course he rules...he was donatello, man...donatello

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What is the most dangerous thing in your home? I am.

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Now that Americans have made clear that they want border controls and immigration laws enforced that benefits Americans, what will Congress and the Prez do next? What do you predict? probably keep fuckin up...it looks like thats all they know how to do

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Define God: If you believe in God, what are his/her attributes? If you don't believe, explain what the term means to you. Just two things to consider: Time/space limitations Predetermination Etc. If God is to be the creator, then it has got to be transcendent over time and space...while i believe it is genderless, i like to think of god as having a long viking-like beard and some sort of gigantic warhammer or battle axe slung over his shoulder...also, he would have a giant falcon, that could catch any prey, even the Flash

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Guys, do you prefer curly, wavy, or straight hair on a girl? the king likes all shapes and sizes

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What do you think of the way Gordon Ramsay treats his employees, contestants, and total strangers? Gordon ramsay is just another dickbag acting for the camera, hes worse than the girls on super sweet 16 and i avoid his BS show like the plague, along with every other 'reality' show. i put quotes because in actual reality--as in without lots of money on the line--somebody would punch that douchebag out

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What is your most desparate sandwich you've made? Mine's kim chee and mayo, the only stuff that was in my fridge. i made a PBJ on a stale hotdog bun once

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What is the best way to get a 3 1/2 year old to stop throwing fits when we go shopping or out to eat? She is very strong willed and is impossible to take anywhere. Stop taking her out into crowded public places where she can ruin everyone elses day, and for the love of god, when she starts acting up, take her outside...it wasnt our choice to have the kids; stop ruining our movies/dinners/everything

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If President Bush rejected a subpoena does that mean that all Americans can reject subpoenas? no, because as we learned in animal farm, some people are more equal than others...

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List three things you regret not learning to do. speaking japanese: hang gliding: and using correct punctuation?

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How do I find snacks under 100 calories? read the nutrition labels i guess

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What is the worst thing a man can say to a woman after having sex? not nearly as good as your daughter

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What is the best 'Practical Joke' you have heard / done? On my 18th birthday my mom told my 'dad' about how i'm not really his, and that he spent all his money on some other dude's genetic material...boy did he have egg on his face.

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I love this guy that every one says is a homosexual. But I can turn him straight, I'm uber hot! right? WRONG! ABOUT ALL OF IT!

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What makes you smile instantly? this kid fell off his bicycle today while i was driving by...i have to admit, instant hilarity

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Someone typed this in a message to me the other day (^)(o.O)(^) what does it mean? it means that whoever typed it is stalking you...check your bushes for leavings or other signs of an invader

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Why are there so many ketchup on steak haters in AB? x( i guess cuz its disgusting and the only reason to do it is if youre making the steak shitty...and if youre doing that, you shouldnt be allowed near a steak in the first place

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If you were to be recognized by posterity for one thing, what would you like to be known for? the king will already be known for so much...it is impossible for him to go back down to this hypothetical level...sorry

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Princess Bride or Princess Diaries? princess bride without question...you killed my father, prepare to die!

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Can one pay their way into heaven? In which denomination is this practised most? Well the Catholics had their indulgences--pre-paid sins--that is a big reason for why we have lutherans today...yet another piece of evidence showing that religion is a man-made abomination that twists a good idea into something truly evil

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What is the worst thing a woman can say to her husband during labor? have you got the oven pre-heated? cuz here it comes...

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What don't you like about yourself? And why haven't you done anything to fix that "problem". i dont like how lenient i am on people sometimes

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Do you have a favorite palindrome? If so, what is it? sit on a potato pan otis; rise to vote sir; a man a plan a canal panama im gonna go ahead and claim all three of those

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Mexican food or Chinese Mexican food...all the way

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Do you think people have the right to criticize me for not wanting to birth children? do they have the right? of course.

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How to become straight again? I tired praying and asking for forgiveness but it won't work. And I know for a fact that I just can't accept the fact, and I can't live my life the way I want to unless I become the way I was before. I wasn't born like this. this question cant be real...nobody is this dumb/ridiculous...you are trying to bate us into giving angry answers or something

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Why do people here ask personal questions that no one else here can answer? because like a drunk sorority girl with 'daddy issues' they crave negative attention

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When will Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children be officially released in the US? its out now, my bro has it, and it rocks pretty hard

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What is one question that people ask you all the time? Will you please sire my next child?

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How should I consider an audience when I am in front of them? consider them hostile, if you know martial arts, employ them now

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What are Gwinnett county, GA child molestation laws? i dont know...but better to air on the side of caution and if you feel youre in a grey area, just leave the kid alone, ya know?

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How do I conquer feeding issues at day care? the same way you conquer any enemy...plenty of catapults, archers, and anti-siege tactics like hot oil

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How do you make the ~ go over the n when typing words in Spanish? hold ctrl+shift+alt+~ then type an n

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How do I conjugate Spanish verbs? probably a good question for a spanish teacher...that answer is beyond the scope of this site because there are thousands of verbs, multiple different endings, multiple tenses--including but not limited to, present, perfect, pluperfect, imperfect, preterite, etc--not to mention all the irregulars...jeez what a nutso question...dios mio, este sitio es muy loco

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How do increase my chances to conceive a child? have more sex

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Do you feel positive or negative about the future of mankind? Eventually some asshole will be willing to push the big red button and then we're all doomed...the plus side is if you survive, you get to be a road warrior

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Has anyone played final fantasy 10-2 because i need help! ive also beaten it...my best advice is to throw it in the garbage and pick up a copy of 12 because X2 sucked ass

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How do I recognize signs of OCD? how do i how do i how do i how do i how do i how do i how do i how do i how do i how do i how do i how do i

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How do I comply with IDEA (Individuals with Disabilities Education Improvement Act) as a teacher? At my college, every syllabus had a statement on disability saying that if a student had any special needs they could contact (name provided here) to set something up...the school itself is responsible for the rest i think...in fact, they should be answering this question for you

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Whats your fav Quentin Tarrantino film? loved kill bill...but, pulp fiction is too good all around, its just the perfect film

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If you could go back in time and purchase massive amounts of stock in any company before it took off, which company would you choose? umm...the one the shot up the fastest, its not like i would choose a company i liked

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What are you supposed to do when you go to burger king for french toast sticks, but they give you cinni-minis, and when you look at the reciept it says a biscuit? if you have a samurai sword, now is the time to unsheath it...

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Peanut butter and toe jam..yes or no? whose toe jam?

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Has anyone told you that you look like someone famous? Do YOU think you look like someone famous? If so, who? hitler; i get kicked in the nuts a lot...

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This question is not meant to offend anyone......but ponder this if you will. They have a contest to determine a miss Black USA, but what kind of ruckus would it cause if a pageant were announced in which only caucasian women were allowed to participate? You mean like the miss america pageant? Look, as the majority culture, everythings geared toward us...it might not be called white miss america, but thats basically what it is...even if a black girl wins, its cuz she conforms to our standards of beauty, think vanessa williams: lighter skin, straight hair...let the black people have some stuff of their own; what does it hurt?

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How can I filter out/ignore AB-Bernice? If you find a way...show some love and post it in a question

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Female's watching porn...is that common? it ought to be...mmmm, lord have mercy

| 1 person likes this

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When drama in high school seems to be leading to actual physical fist fighting and "walking away" wont help what is there left to do? by the way the question is set up, i guess fistfighting

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What should I ask next? something better

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I can’t help laughing at other people’s misfortune, for example (homeless, funny looking people, and sometimes the handicapped) am I going to hell? oh my god, this little girl in a wheelchair just tipped over on the sidewalk...lol, thought id share that with you

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When is it OK to be rude? whenever you damned well feel like it

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Why does my dog eat grass? just to spite you

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How do I find cool events that are happening at the Smithsonian? this internet thing youre using to ask the question may provide an answer or two

| 1 person likes this

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What is your favorite RPG Game? chrono trigger if you consider it one, otherwise dragon warrior

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What % of AB users do you think are idiots :)? there is an equation for this... 100% - me

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Why are women so boring? a man has to be interesting if he want people to want him around...a woman is generally wanted around because shes a woman, so for some(key word being some) women, theres no drive to learn how to be interesting

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Blah blah blah Jesus blah blah faith blah blah proof? blah blah blah blah purgatory blah blah blah blah yard rake.

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What number describes you? and yes I said NUMBER! pi

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Welch's accidentally printed 5,000 grapejuice labels that said "RAPEJUICE" but none made it to market. A few made it to eBay. Does this amuse you? rape does not amuse me...rapejuice amuses me immensely

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Why do we digress in another person's AB question? because most people are way more interested in saying what they wanna say, rather than worrying about what somebody else wants

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What are you drinking? at the moment an ice cold Honey Brown

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What is your fave reality tv show? The Ultimate Fighter is the only one i watch...the rest are shit

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I finished all the levels in Lego Star Wars II for Nintendo DS (excluding Freeplay). Now what do I do? GO OUTSIDE

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What was the first thought that came into your head this morning? shes still here?

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Do you still occasionally run down an empty isle and jump onto your trolley? its called a shopping cart, dammit...you folks across the pond are nuts

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Can this question make 20 points just for being posted? (re - The Random posts of nothingness yesterday!) it will if the king has anything to say about it

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What is the worst part about packing up your home/apartment and moving? When all the friends you've already helped move make up some bullshit for why they cant help you.

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Have you ever tried to get revenge on an old bf/gf that broke your heart? 12 shattered windows and a dalmation full of laxative later, the king was a renewed man

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Any low cost home business ideas? start a pyramid scheme...or, cut out the middle man and just rob some houses

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If you were locked up in prison or some type of isolation what would you do to keep your sanity? Two things Ive always wanted to go to prison just to do: 1. Find Islam 2. Run my cup across the bars nonstop

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Your magical dwarf name?? add the first 2 letters of your first name to the last 2 letters of your last name and the middle letter in your middle name. Kimeo...not bad

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How do you convince a rabid pack rat that he'll never find a use for all the stuff he keeps? why try to explain when a match will fix the problem quickly?

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Does rinsing hair with beer make it stronger and fuller? only if its chest hair

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What are great physical and competitive sports that won't demand too much on my dodgy ankle? anything involving swimming...its easy on the joints i think...depending on how its dodgy, cycling might be ok too, granted its using the ankle but there is no lateral movement, so if it can handle the up and down, youre all set

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How do you interpret the bible? Its a book thats got plenty of good stuff...and plenty of bad...a bunch of folks think it was written by God, which makes it kinda dangerous...also a bunch of assholes throughout time have used it in a exploitative way that can only be described as globally detrimental

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Does Pornography Liberate or Degrade Society? The king doesnt need pornography.

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What is your favorite brands for Shampoo and Coditioners? I cleanse myself with the tears of my fallen enemies

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Which industry is the most profitable? by the numbers...petroleum

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Are you a Christian? Why or why not? not so sure...but Jebus is a great guy

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When you have french fries do you squirt the ketchup all over the chips or do you put it all in one place? are you like half american/half english or something? I put the ketchup on the side of my french fries/chips. only cheese goes all over them

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Intoxicated cheating - Why do some people think that being drunk is an excuse for cheating? The King doesnt need an excuse...its good to be the King

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What is the percentage of married couples that stay together for ever and never divorce? 0%...that whole 'til deat do us part' thing pretty much keeps the whole forever thing from happening

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Regaring Alanis Morrisette's "Ironic", I think that rain on your wedding day is more foreshadowing than ironic. Which do you think it is and why? Really none of that song is ironic...most of it is catastrophically sorrowful, or a really strange coincidence, but none of it is ironic...the thing is, alanis is smart enough to know that...therefore, the irony is, this whole song about being ironic, is not ironic...seriously

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Which adjective perfectly sums up Great Britain? Smarmy

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Which adjective do you feel sums up the USA? free-ish

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Is your first name also the name of a company? Mine is Tomy, like the japanese toy producer. Yeah, Burger King has got the king in it...

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What do you think of parents who use those child leashes? While I find the leashes demeaning, it keeps their greasy kids with their dirty, pudgy hands away from the king and his stuff

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What is something you like doing that is usually typical of the opposite sex? For example, my Grandfather taught me an appreciation for mechanics. the king enjoys a good cry...but it isnt out of sorrow or even joy...rather i have the most masculine and strengthened tear ducts in the world, and i like to give them workouts...i can break a coke bottle with my tears from fifteen yards...not exactly feminine

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How do you catch a work theif???(some one who steals pens, paperclips, tissue from desks, food from the fridge..etc) Give the old Spanish Inquisition...start whippin people until you get a confession.

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Whats the scariest movie ever made? Norbit...just kidding, i didnt watch that piece of crap, but its really scary that other people did

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Is there a good way to approach someone who dislikes you for no reason? Me: Hey dick! Other guy: Wha...? POW!(<---- me rearranging his jaw)

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Do you perceive Kentucky Fried Chicken as a viable dining option now that they've eliminated trans fat? the only reason id ever not consider it a viable dining option would be if they eliminated original recipe

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Why did nobody ever get oscar the grouch any help....clearly he was a bum....only one living in a garbage can on sesame street. bum is the wrong word...he was housing challenged, every now and then hed pup up to teach the kids a lesson...why get down on the guy? the king and him were saturday morning neighbors for a long while...much love to the old block

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Do you prefer to take baths or showers? I I take take showers showers

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Crips or Bloods? king love

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If Snickers really satisfies, why do they make a king size bar? because theres satisfation, and then theres mmmm satisFACtion

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How many beers are in a case? 30

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Do you curse unnecessarily? fuck yeah

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If you spelled your name backwards would it actually make a word? the kings last name is kayak...so nothing happens...bet that blows your mind...palindromes, bitch!

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I just got a raise!!!!!!! What drink will you buy me to celebrate? congrats...but youre the one with all this new extra cash flow...the king will take a jack and coke

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Who do you think would win in a fight Godzilla or King kong? I think there have been a few documentaries about this...

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I want to make furniture from ferns. Any good ideas? yeah. dont.

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My real name has 6 letters in the first name, middle and last name, what is interesting about your name? are you ex-president ronald wilson reagan, risen from the dead? If so, get back in the ground; you sucked.

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What is a good wedding gift to give to a couple who hasn't registered? (This is one of my wife’s questions) gift card for home depot wrapped in a list of instructions on how to not be dumbasses who dont register

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Who do you think will win the presidential election in 2008? Probably another politician...it doesnt matter who; theyre all the same

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Does anyone play a type of musical instrument and why did you choose that to play I can play the tuba...its been a few years, but i can play just about anything...i was damn good, my names on some placks and everything

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Define words for either Tom DeLonge, Travis Barker or Mark Hoppus. douchebag; douchebag with drumming talent; and huge douchebag, respectively

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Are there long term health effects on people who live in a hot stuffy climate like in Miami FL compared to people who live in a breathe more easily type of environment? Do people in muggy climates have stronger lungs? etc..... I have heard, but cant confirm, that people in colder climates are actually better off as diseases and other things dont flourish like they do it hotter, damper areas.

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There was an accident in which a girl fell down.the guy who was the cause fled.i helped her get up.everybody was just watching.one guy commented that i helped her just because she was a girl and i wanted to touch her.what else am i supposed to do? get in his face and act really crazy...if he does something hit him

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What do you think is the most revolutionary game console and why? well i dont own any of them, but since a full revolution requires 360 degrees...im gonna go with xbox 360

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Do people normally think you are older or younger than you actually are? Why? when my beards grown out, much older, when i shave it, either younger or on the money

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Who else just wants to punch the eharmony commerical guy/doctor in the face? id give him a kick to the stones, then when he hunches over give him a little mac style star punch...then more kicks to the stones...normally im against kickin another man in the bits, but if i mutilate them, he wont be as effective a pitchman for a love website

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What (if anything) do you collect? scalps

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If God had a favorite food, what would it be? Soylent Green

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What do you do with all the AOL disks that you get? frisbee party

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Whats the secret to success? sleep with people who have achieved it

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Who is the scariest man on the face of the earth? I am.

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Do you generally write in cursive or print? the king has scribes...and the king demands that every word he says be in calligraphy

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What is the best colour eye shadow to wear with blue eyes and light skin? the king is no makeup artist, but he can say he prefers no or little make up

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Do you ever feel your genius isn't fully appreciated on Answerbag? all the damn time

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Do you have anything to celebrate today? Today marks the anniversary of my kingdoms triumph over the kingdom of douchebaggery

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How does God feel about gay marriage? its pretty hard to say, since nobody fucking talks to him...anybody that claims they do is trying to sell you something

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Do you know anyone that's better looking and smarter than you? nope

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What are the top ten deadliest animals in the world? since humans has already been taken ill say chupacabras

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In your opinion, what is the nastiest sports injury of all time? i know theres worse...but one of my rugby teammakes drilled a guy so hard it broke a rib, which punctured the guys gall bladder, on top of that he had breathing problems and stuff...to see the guy up close was pretty bad

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If there is a separation between church and state, why can't homosexual couples get married? Because that separation is one of the biggest myths about our government.

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Big fan of Death Cab, The Killers, Modest Mouse. What are some other good bands that go in that direction. franz ferdinand, the libertines, dirty pretty things, arctic monkeys--especially the arctic monkeys--and if you like death cab you should check out gibbards other project postal service

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Do you think being 16 and wanting to get pregnant is wrong? i wont say its wrong, but that is a huge commitment for a young developing person

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Do you think the motor vehicle laws should be changed, so that elderly drivers should have to take annual tests to keep their license? Do you think some elderly drivers are dangerous on the roads? yes indeed i do...i know it sucks when the elderly are discriminated against, but many of them are not physically capable of safe driving, just like young people...i dont feel bad for keeping the road safe by not giving a ten year old a license, why should i feel bad for keeping the road safe by taking away a seventy-year-olds?

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Many people seem to feel a certain measure of resentment towards skinny women, and immediately think when they see them that they're anoerexic and/or have self-esteem issues. But tell me, what do you think when you see an anoerexically thin *Man*? usually i think "emos are really annoying"

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If you could say one sentence to stop someone from starting to smoke what would it be? drop it or i shoot

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3 points to level 20 and holding. Why aren't there any good questions to answer right now? there ya go

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Why does my boat lean to the left rear while i am driving? I dont know about all that newtons law stuff...boats are generally engineered to deal with the effects of the engine...i can tell you that if you are boating alone and are not very heavy, and if your steering column is on the starboard like with many boats, there is usually some wait added to the port side of boats to even out a lone operator

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Do you think smoking pot is a gateway to other drugs? smoking pot is a gateway to 7 11 runs for cheetos, little debbies, and chocolate milk...if it leads to other drugs, my guess is you were headed there in the first place

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What do you like to fall asleep to at night? A radio, fan, television, or something else? the heavy breathing of another satisfied maiden

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I know what racism is because I watch college cheerleading... How do you know what racism is? i know this isnt really a funny topic, but that question made me laugh...seriously, though because I have grown up with it.

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Is it wrong for a 17 year old to like a 12 year old? in that case, its not wrong for anybody to like anybody, (as long as it stays at that)

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My boyfriend is catholic and i am a christian... is this against the rules? Only if your boyfriend has a problem with marrying slow people...catholics are christians

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If someone asks on AB how to pass a drug test, why is it that a lot of baggers just automatically go into the "don't do drugs" routine automatically? Is that really being helpful? ill admit i told a guy that stopping might help, but i prefaced it with "if you want to get employed" i dont look down on people because they like to use substances; its a free country, but the question is asking about employment...coming from a family of business owners, i know that insurance companies--who run this country with an iron fist--demand drug testin...if you dont...

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If I were invited to your place for a home-cooked meal, what could I expect you to prepare? ( I love vegetarian and vegan food as well) probably some cornish game hen, a bowl of mead, a fine shepherds pie, and plenty of tripe

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Is it wrong for a 17 year old to like a 12 year old? if this were the days of st augustine--look him up, he was canonized despite fucking ten-year-olds, talk about a precedent!--and the culture didnt look down on pedophilia as much...id still say yes, that is friggin disgusting

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Should you stay in a marrage for the sake of the kids if your not in love anylonger? every couple ive ever seen that does this ruins the life of everybody involved

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I received a letter for employment 2 days ago....I have to go for a drug test on Friday. I quit smoking 2 days ago...How can I get rid of the THC in my system?(For Free) there is no way...thc--and this does depend on the person--stays in the system for about a month...and i think your hair carries the trace until you cut it off...if youre tryin to get employed the thing to do is probably not to smoke anymore

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If you heard the movie title "the soggy slice" what would u think the movie was going to be about? a circle jerk

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Since joining Answerbag have you started to speak in question form? What are you talking about?

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Can you get high off of peanut skins? you share can buddy...you wanna buy some? you just have to mix it with LOTS of weed

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I am what I am. What does that phrase mean to you? its the same effect to me as the phrase 'it is what it is' or 'stuff happens' usually its uttered after somebody did something wrong and they want to make it sound like its not a big deal

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A co-worker and I had an affair, but she wants to end it because we are both married. How do I stop having feelings for her? youre an asshole for cheating

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If you saw a man and a woman you didn't know, and the man hits the woman what would you do? Same thing I do whenever i see an unprovoked attack...tackle the motherfucker and kick him in the ribs, somebody else can call the cops

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Would you rather have a maid or a chef? the king already has several of each

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How do I end a relationship with a Libra? nothing makes a statement like slashed tires

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Miss Sweden has boycotted the Miss Universe Contest, labelling it a 'degrading' pageant and weighed down by scandals. What are your thoughts? I guess the Miss Sweden pagent is known for its persuance of realistic women after all...

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What kind of fruit is a Liberry? If you eat it, it makes you say shit like foilage and nucular

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Would you ever choose not to date someone because of their profession? I don't think I could ever date a fluffer...im not gonna explain what it is here...just look it up.

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How dangerous is skydiving? with or without a parachute?

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How do I end a relationship with an Aquarius? I suppose drowning her is out of the question...

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How do I end a long term relationship? in a hail of gunfire

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Why are we practically forced to be ashamed of bieng white? Nobody forces me to be ashamed, and im white as rice on a paper plate...I'll admit there are a bunch of guilty liberals out there as well as some folks who arent white who do try to lay down a guilt trip...but those are just the assholes, and the assholes are always the loudest...in my experience, most people of every background know the score if you really listen to them...dont let what a...

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Is there a reason certain users have added royal titles to their username's? Am I missing out on something? Should I change my name to Mistress Satine I? Let's not beat around the bush here, ok? you gotta beef with the king? All my cards are on the table, lets talk through this.

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How do I deal with a school shooting? im not gonna tell you what you have to do...i personally usually shake my head a good deal, then hope that the people affected get through it with the least damage possible, and try to get on with my life

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Would you like to come to ireland for a few days I would like to live there I think...I hear nothing but good things about that place

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How do I eliminate student loan debt? by paying it off i think...you can usually use check or money order

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Is the pelvis the center of the body i can say that it definitely has the most magnetic pull

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If you submerge your hands in a bowl of orange juice for 10 minutes, can your body still absorb and use nutrients in the OJ just like it would if you were drinking it? definitely, i suggest you make this the only way you do it from now on

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What is the best way to tell someone you find their avatar deeply disturbing and offensive? i have to guess you mean raggamuffin, and i would say to go ahead and tell them instead of asking passive aggresive general questions

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How do I eat more to weigh less? i actually did that really effectively once...its just all about managing the sizes of your servings and reallyplanning your whole day out...i ate way more than i had been, but it was all healthy and all broken into like six or seven smaller meals...it keeps your metabolism churning without filling you up, i lost a ton of weight...also try to stop eating before like five o clock at night, thats...