Answer to:
What is your view on an 18 year old girl in love with a 54 year old man? ♫Three times a lady....♫

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The last time you used an egg, what did you use it for? Boiled it , painted a willy on it and gave it to me brother for Christmas.

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What do you miss most from the 90's? Being able to dance at a wedding without taking a breather through the first song !!

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Using only one word describe something that angers you. Selfishness.

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How do you get a cat to come home? Ring him on his mobile and tell him the dog's eating his dinner.

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I have just downloaded an mp3 album off play.com for the first time. It is now in my music on my computer. Now how do i put this on my apple ipod using Itunes? i've tried that mate but it won't have it. the album's in a zipped folder , is this maybe the problem ?

Answer to:
How many meters is 45.89 cm? .4589 meters. You divide by a hundred hence moving the decimal points two places to the left.

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What do you like to eat to cheer yourself up? Clowns , 'cos they taste funny.

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When you were little, what was the 1st sport you wanted to play? Football , as a kid in London I didn't know there was any other sports !!!!

| 1 person likes this

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What if your cell phone fell in the toilet, what would you do? Go downstairs , ring your phone up , rush back up and have a lovely bubbly bidet on yer backside.

| 1 person likes this

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Is there a song that seems to sum up your entire life? if so what song is it? for me its eminem-beautiful. Unfortunately.

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What's the first song that comes to your mind for the Who? My Generation , without a doubt.

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What's the biggest lie you ever said to someone after sex? You liked that.

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Do you think it is wrong to mess around with your neighbor? Yeah. Sorry forget this. Had photo to go with answer but it won't let me upload it.

| 1 person likes this

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Why are you not in bed? My dog just did a poop in it.

| 1 person likes this

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Which country has the most beautiful women? and in which the most attractive men? Sweden ,without a doubt.

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Main reason to eat healthy? More stamina in bed.

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Answer to:
What do law enforcement agencies do with confiscated drugs? Have a party man.

Answer to:
What do u do when your madly in love with a celebrity that doesn't know u even exist? See a shrink.

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What are some things to do on facebook? I just joined and....theres nothing there! First of all get a load of friends on there and then look at their profiles and you'll soon pick up the things that go on. At first I agree, you think what's all the fuss about ? But as you add friends it all becomes clear , you get addicted and never look back. :-)

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What best piano song have you ever heard of? Bruce Hornsby - The way it is.

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It is assumed that "jokesters"...those who love to play jokes on others... can take it as well as dish it out. Have you ever known a "jokester" who dished it out but had a "hissy fit" when the joke was on him/her? I know a lot of these and it's because they crave attention. They don't like it when they have the joke returned because they're basically insecure .

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What DEAD musician (of any era) would you have liked to see perform in concert more than any other? john Lennon.

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Name one thing that is usually made of some type of glass Sand.

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When you were in High School what did you want to be when you grew up? Did you make it? I wanted to be a comedian , and yes , I made it. I'm now a member of Parliament.

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Who is your favorite music artist and why? OASIS.

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Answer to:
George Walker Bush is _________. Finish the sentence. crusty

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Does anybody knows where Osama bin Laden is right now? Playing bingo.

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What are some funny ways of saying you are going to the toilet? I'm off to lay a cable.

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What's another name for a toilet? White Hart Lane.

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Why do you two make a good couple? Cos we gay and ugly and don't care man !!!!! Just hope we ain't related !!!

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Do you cut the grass/lawn? I pour whiskey on it and it comes up half cut.

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What helps you wake up in the morning? Me girlfriend doing a botty burp.

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Do ducks have friends or do they mainly stick with family? My mates a duck and he's got 37 friends on facebook.

| 1 person likes this

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What's the longest you've driven without car insurance? Twenty yards. The bloody policeman was at the end of me drive.

| 1 person likes this

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What do i do if the guy i like is dating someone else? Wait and hope.

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How do birds communicate with each other? Bird calls. Just asked me avatar.

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Do you talk to your wife every day? No , she's dead.

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How do you stop from breaking up with your girlfriend? Blackmail her.

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The ugliest article of clothing I have ever seen looks like... This willy warmer.

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I want to name one of my boys Sparrow. Any thoughts? It's ok but won't he have white poop.

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How do you stop an elephant from charging? Don't plug him in.

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Do you know anyone that has had or does have the swine flu? yes , and they;ve had it it for two WHHHEEEKKSS !! Say it in a piggy stylee

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What do you like about Sunday's? The end of it.

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Can you think of a song about an imaginary place? Xanadu.

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Name 1 way you know that your having good sex? My porn dvd tops the best sellers list.

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What made you seek out plastic surgery? I was eating a toffee and my face got stuck.

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Egg + Onion + Potato =? Botty burps in the middle of the night.

| 1 person likes this

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Who would be a cool roommate to have? A snowman.

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Do snakes have legs? Yeah , an ex girlfriend was a right snake and she had two.

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Are you hot in bed? Only in a house fire.

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Especially or Specially? What's the difference? Had to make a quick return mate. Congratulations. Shut all the Man u idiots over here and with a fair ref !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope you and your family are keeping well. Bless yer. Mark.

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What's the oldest thing that you've ever found? My grandad down the back of the sofa.

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Name something you saw wrong today. A plank of wood , I cut my finger.

| 1 person likes this

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How can a man get a girl friend when his age is above50? A Brad Pitt mask , some viagra and a stolen flash fast car.

| 1 person likes this

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There is a robber in my school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what the hell do I do? Put him on the end of your pencil.

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[ FUN Q ] I surely deserve something more than just a ________ ! (fill in the blank ) ...lump of donkey poop.

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I have a pain in the crease of my left leg . It starts at the pelevic area and goes straight to the crease of my leg . Sometimes its very hard to walk sometimes it even brings me to my knees . I had a back injury 10 months ago. Still off work.Help Me I'm not a doctor but it could be sciatica which is a trapped nerve, this could've been a result of your back injury. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sciatica

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Have you ever had an x-ray (xray)? Loads of times. If you're about to have one , don't worry , it's painless and doesn't take long.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why did the easter bunny skip my house last year? Last years one had big legs.

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How can I tell how old my rabbit is? Count the candles on his cake at his next birthday party.

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Are you comfortabe nude in front of other people? Not really, do you blame me.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How could you make your first date with someone really akward? Fart at the dinner table.

| 2 people like this

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What are you waiting for? My mate to buy a round in the pub.

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Best / favorite male cologne. Davidoff Cool Water.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What makes a man lose interest in sex? If the female does a botty burp.

| 1 person likes this

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Describe a news programme in 1 word Misery.

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Answer to:
What is the meaning of whatever life brings? Que Sera Sera , whatever will be will be.

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Do you like to play soccer(football),and whose your best player? I used to play all the time and my favourite player of recent times is the little genius Gianfranco Zola.

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Answer to:
Still being hunted by the bitch,but why? Have you still got her Britney cd ?

Answer to:
[Fun Q] A person has killed 40 people, raped 100 girls and has robbed 24 banks. Think of any suitable punishment? Chop his willy off and put it in a gun and shoot it at his face.

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Answer to:
Your life would suck without who? My teeth.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why do Americans hate the French so much? Their fries make them fat.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Is there any special ways to make a child walk faster Tie a lollypop to a bit of string on the end of a length of bamboo and dangle it in front of them as you walk quickly behind them.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Where could my black duffel bag be? Down the back of the sofa ?

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Best way to get your ex back? Win the lottery.

| 1 person likes this

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Im making pie and cant decide what filling to make. What is your favourite pie fillings? I need Ideas Squirrel and onion gravy .

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Answer to:
If I bit my lip would you kiss it better? But of course.

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Is the English Premier League currently the best soccer league in the world as at 2009? In my opinion it is , though I like watching the Spanish League as well. Four English teams are in the last eight of the Champions League which I think supports my opinion.

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Answer to:
Whats a nice baby girl name? Chelsea.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do your neighbors ever mow thw lawn very early in the morning? Yeah , especially when a delivery van turns up in the street. Nosey gits !!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the best thing that you used or use for acne A mask.

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Why does woman needs a man...? Willy.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What are bananas good for? Yeah , as long as you don't slip on them 'cos then you can end up in hospital.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is something that might make your heart pump faster? Kylie Minogue with no clothes on.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Which singer has the most recognizable voice? Roy Orbison.

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You want................? Peace man.

| 1 person likes this

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Have you ever kept wanting someone that didn't want you? Yeah. Kylie.

| 1 person likes this

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When you are talking to someone do you like to maintain eye contact? I'd like to but I can't.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What is the functions of bones To keep your body together !!!

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How do you go about cutting a long story short? Have a lie in and don't bother starting it !!

| 1 person likes this

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On a scale of 1-10 how well do you like your S/O body? Nought.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Anyone in need of a totally loyal friend that won't screw you over? You mean they do them !!

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Answer to:
What are you currently hearing or listening to? The Amorphous Andronogous - A psychedelic bubble exploding in your mind.

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How does McDonald's cook its eggs? On a McGrill.

Answer to:
The next time you open your fridge, what is the first thing you see? Just beer.

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Answer to:
The next time you open your fridge, what is the first thing you see? Beer , and more , plus some stuff to put in a sandwich.

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How do you find out someone's ring size without them knowing? Make a pudding with whipped cream on it and then dare them to stick their finger in it and lick it. I bet you they will . When they leave the room get your ruler out.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
When will world governments admit to UFO's? Can't believe they didn't after ET.

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What's the worst, cruelest, most hurtful thing you've ever said to someone? Did you mean it? My nan blamed me for a fart at the dinner table one day so I nicked her false teeth and stuck them in the dog food.

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Answer to:
Why are you so difficult to reach? i live in a shed over a cliff face. Postman won't come down there.

Answer to:
What is one of the most important lessons one of your grandparents taught you? Don't hide their false teeth or you won't get any lemonade.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Has anybody else noticed that there typing skills have improved since they started AB? Yse.

Answer to:
Has anyone had unpleasant side-effects from nicotine patches? Yes , big time. I had to throw them away , they were giving me vivid nightmares. A friend warned me about it and blimey, how right they were !!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What's your favorite song by the Temptations? Ain't Too Proud To Beg.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do bacteria and/or viruses get "sick"? Hope so.

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Answer to:
What is the worst secret to keep from your significant other? I've had sex change.

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Answer to:
If you had a gun that can kill anything. what will you do Kill Mondays.

Answer to:
When freshwater meets seawater, the freshwater will... Scream.

Answer to:
Do you ever find yourself really mad at someone on AB? If yes, why? Used to but now take everything with a pinch of salt.If someone annoys you just keep away from them .

Answer to:
If people started calling you by your username, what would you think? Some people do.

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Answer to:
Do you have a neighbor that you would literally throw a party if they moved? Yes , when they have sex it's like an earthquake and keeps me up for hours.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What should you do if you say the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time? Scarper.

Answer to:
What is the cheapest meal you have ever had? When i nicked my nan's xmas dinner when she weren't looking.

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Answer to:
''If I were a computer '' I'd get fed up with people sticking things in me and swearing at me. I'd also be down the doctors all the time with a virus. Not a nice life.

Answer to:
What have you noticed about yourself, as you get older? My willy looks like a walnut whip.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Have you ever fallen asleep whilst kissing/having sex? Yeah , when i've had twelve pints and then watch a porn film at 2 in the morning.

Answer to:
What's the rudest surname you've ever come across? Stefan Kuntz , German footballer.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Who came up with the concept of vacuum? Barry Manilowe.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What can a short man do to be overall more attractive? Wear stilts and some mascara and a touch of blusher.

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Is there a "motto" for where you live? What is it? Get out or you'll end up with nowt.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What did your parents forget to tell you as you grew up? Not every girl you fancied would want to go with you.

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Answer to:
If your pet suddenly talked and asked for a beer, what would you say? "Get your own you cheeky little git."

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What is something you shouldn't sell at a garage sell? Your grandparents.

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Why do guys like to see our naked bodies? It makes my willy grow.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Whats the worst excuse you've ever heard for cheating? I was sleepgroping.

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My boyfriend has a foot fetish.but complains that my feet never smell.he loves to sniff them.any ideas hoe to make them smell? we tried somethings,but nothing. fustrated Walk barefoot in horse poop . it will drive him wild . He'll make love like a stallion.

Answer to:
Wow, it's been years I haven't seen you. You look so _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) Tortoiselike.

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Answer to:
Has anyone been to the Titanic Exibiton in Galveston TX?, if so, h ow was it? It was a mere drop in the ocean to other exhibitions i've been to.

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How old were you when you got your first memory? Can't remember.

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On a scale of 1-10, how much do you like to hug? Do you do more cyber-hugging or in-person hugging? A mate .... 0 Bird with big boosy whackers .....9.5

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
May I talk to your manager, please? Well you could but you can't because I've got my hands round his throat. A belated happy new year to you and your family mate. Take care,

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the most frightening sound? My nan farting after a plate load of sprouts.

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Will you please help me trim my toe nails? Just coming mate.

| 1 person likes this

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How many meals do you eat per day? 26.

Answer to:
What is on your left hand right now? My girlfriends right boob.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
I don't want to waste my life, what's one thing you recommend I do before I die? Visit my bed if you've got big boobs , if not check out the other answers.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Can you name anything that tastes salty? Chefs chocolate salty balls.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What would be the worst thing a waiter could do? A wet fart whilst you're eating your Mississippi Mud Pie.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why is it "football and beer" when its more like football and cocktales? I go and see Chelsea every week mate and I can guarantee you it's football and beer all the way with me !!

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What shouldn't you encourage your children to do? Rob banks.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Whats the meanest thing your mum ever did/said to you as a kid? That my real dad was The Elephant Man.

| 3 people like this

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Trying to show my wife what a wide range of people are on AB. She just watched me playing around on AB for the 1st time last night, and she is kind of impressed. Just city/state, or city/country...Where are you from? Crawley , Southern England , thirty miles from London.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
Have you learned to laugh at yourself? Sure , in a mirror.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is your outlook on HIV& AIDS Don't get it !!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Where's the worst place to call out, "Group hug!"? Men's showers after a football match !!!!!!! Or in an acupunture clinic !!

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Do you think you eat enough? Not really , feel i could squeeze some more in at times.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
One fine morning I went up the hill and___________________. farted on a mushroom.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why don't people find it wrong when a women hits a man? A lot do , don't think it's only one way !! You'd be surprised.

Answer to:
4 words you wanted to hear after sex " Have that for free "

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Have you ever googled yourself? If yes, what showed up? Someone had answered one of my questions on here !! :-D

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What is still a mystery to you? How Tottenham Hotspur beat Chelsea.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
On average, how many people each year die choking on badgers? Only one in history and he came back as Don King.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What was the last concert you went to see? Paul Weller in Crawley , England.

Answer to:
You are alone in my house. What will you do? Have a game of chess with Macauley Culkin.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
If a girl called a guy 'hun'.what does it mean?guys,what would you make of it? It's short for Honey and only an innocent pet name.

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Have you ever walked into a spider web? I'm a postman and it's part of the job this time of year. I once knocked at someone's house with a packet to be told I had two spiders hanging from my cap !! It's horrible , I hate it.

Answer to:
Do you have a good sense of humor or are you always serious? Tops.

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Answer to:
Whales are totally different from human beings in.....(Would you like to fill it!)? They have 40 foot willies.

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It's 4:00 am! Your mother and I were worried sick! WHERE have you BEEN!? Fighting a load of bats.

| 1 person likes this

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Which celebrity would you most like to punch in the head? David Beckham while his stupid egotistical bitch of a wife looked on. Sorry but I can't stand them !!!

| 1 person likes this

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Outsiders, what are your thoughts on 2008 US election? I really don't care. Can't wait till it's over, don't it drag on. When it comes on the news I flick over. ( England ).

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What would be a good manly, rugged mans name? Rocky Mountain.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the best halloween costume you have ever seen? Next door's dogs.

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Answer to:
You like to flirt with a __________. Hamster.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How can you put 15 mice into 4 cages, so that each cage has an odd # of mice in it? 9 , 3 , 1 and two. In the last cage stuff one of the mice into the other ones mouth.

| 1 person likes this

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Is your avatar spooky? No , but I think they've just seen something spooky !!!!

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Is coffee the only way to get your day started? I'm a postman mate so I need a couple of pints.

| 5 people like this

Answer to:
Has a baby ever been born laughing? I was born laughing , the doctor had really big ears.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What would you like to see under the Christmas Tree in 2008? With a bow round her.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
You become drunk in front of your kids for the first time ever and throw up: How do you react....(a) you're only human, (b) dinner made you sick, (c) you feel horribly guilty, (d) you won't do it again, or ............... .. that's it !! No more of mum's dinners , I'm cooking from now on.

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Answer to:
Simplify. 1. (2x+3y-5)+(-3y-6) 2. 3xy+4xy-6xz 3. -3x-6x+x 4. (4x+3y)-(2x-5y) 5. 4x+6x-8x 6. -3(2x-1)-5 7. 7xy+2xz+4xz-12xyz+2zx 8. 2(3x-1)+15 9. 2x+3y-4x 10. -3(2x-5)-4(x+7) x= no bloody chance.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Would you paint a room in your house red? Never. Will not even wear one bit of red on my clothing. That spells Man Utd , Liverpool and Arsenal to me and that would be sacrilige.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What's next for Hillary Clinton? Big Mac and chips.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Did you know that the Republicans are in favor of flatulence? It's true! ♫ The answer my friend is blowing in the wind...♫

| 3 people like this

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If i came over to your house to help with any job that needed doing.. what would that job be? Refil the fridge with beer and fix the puncture on my blow up doll.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How do I tell if I'm pregnant with an Alien? When you have a scan the baby will have long fingers and one of them will have a red light at the end of it.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
At what age are men most romantic? Drinking age.

| 1 person likes this

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If my ex keeps asking my guy friend if we date, is my ex jealous? Funny thing relationships. My answer to this is he'll still have feelings even though he isn't with you anymore. I give this answer through personal experience.

| 1 person likes this

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Are your grandparents still alive? All gone I'm afraid , but not forgotten.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Is siber bulling the wost? All bullying is the same... no place for it in our World.

Answer to:
When your sleep deprived, you ________. ...poo on my garden gnome.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Can candy make you hyper? Yes , for the simple reason it's full of sugar and artificial colourings,

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why is that women dont know what they want? They do but won't show it because underneath they know we won't give it to them.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the best apple for apple pie? I prefer sour apples when they are raw (like Granny Smith's). Bramleys.

| 2 people like this

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If you were the owner of a newpaper,What would be the name of your newspaper? The Daily Screwz.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Who owns the moon? Can astronauts claim the moon for king and country, as in the Age of Discovery? Are corporations allowed to expropriate its natural resources, and individuals to own its real estate? These two bought it last Wednesday.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
I got dumped a couple of months ago because I lost my sixpack so I wasn't hot anymore. Now that I have it back, she wants me back. Should I give her another chance? No way , she only wants you for yer beer !!!! No girl's ever gonna have my beer !!

| 1 person likes this

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Do guys like girls that play guitar? That's one of my biggest turn ons for some reason !!!! :-P

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What did Monty Python teach you about life? When parrots are lying on the bottom of a cage they're usually dead.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is mars made out of Chocolate caramel covered squishy brown stuff.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Do you have a picture of your mug? I'll go first. Just made one especially for this question.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What do you find, more often than not, upsets your peace of mind? Selfish behaviour.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Is there an article of clothing you will never buy or wear because you just don't like it even if it is popular? A leopard skin thong or anything red !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Pink floyd's greatest song ever. Wish you were here for the simple reason it makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.....pure class.

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What should I study most to pass the firefighter test? Where the nearest water supply is.

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This guy is touchy feely with me,calls me darling,always gives me a wink,wolf whistles and says i look good,is he into me? He soon will be if you let him.

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What do you think when you see a family of over 10 children? They ain't got no telly.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What’s a memorable flaw of your first car? My fat arsed ex girlfriend used to get in it.

| 2 people like this

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I've been watching this answerbag movie for like 5 hours now how does it end? Your eyes get heavy and you hit the bed.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Do you post filler answers to obtain points? Who cares about points ? I'm on here for a laugh without being offensive.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
How is aluminum isolated? Everyone get together and agree not to talk to it.

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Who is controlling george bush? I think it's the people who have their hands up the arse of the muppets.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
If you have a choice to hear only one song all your life or live in without music - what would you choose? And what song would it be, if you choose to hear music. No contest.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you think dogs ever look back on their puppyhood? Cheers ! Always wondered this though because they usually remember people who have done them wrong. I like to think they reminisce on sunny times as well. :-)

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What sports terms have you used to describe something sexual? for example "Scoring" Shooting practice !!! Balls in the back of the net !!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is your last message to President Bush? When you leave The White House make sure you've turned everything off.

| 6 people like this

Answer to:
What led to the extinction of dinosaurs? Wiped out by one big Jurrasic Fart.

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What's the worst thing to say to your boss when she/he is in a bad mood? Chill you muppet.

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Can anyone tell me what may cause breast enlargement, increased discharge, tiredness and a desire for foods that are normally not liked? Rabies.

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If your were to write your autobiography what would you leave out through embarrassment? Size of my willy.

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Who would ever yell out in a restaurant, "Yo waitress, you forgot to give me the bread!"? Jesus.

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What is your most unique talent, or the one thing your best known for? Thousands of useless answers on here .

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What does it mean when a bell rings? A sprint to the bar.

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Do you know anyone who turns your knees to jelly, makes your heart skip a beat and ignites your soul? Scarlett Johansson. ( Dribble dribble )

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What's your favorite kind of cheese? Mature cheddar , eat it.

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What do you think God is doing now? Ten pin bowling.

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What was your worst date ever and what happened? At Christmas one time , was on the toilet till the New Year.

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Do boys or men like hair or no hair on a girl down there? Don't like looking like I'm out of ZZTOP.

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Why does dogs chase their tails? Because they're stupid.

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What is something your parents do that to this day you will not understand? Tell me off.

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I miss my ex-boyfriend. We're taking a "break" (his decision). Can I contact him or is it best not to? No , let it be . If he wants to come back he will don't worry about that. However , from previous experiences I've usually found this meant it was over ,although I hope this is not the outcome in this case. Good luck !!

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Do you get excited when you receive a comment? No , cos they're usually nasty !!

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Do you have any gray hair? If so, how old are you? I have , I'm forty and I don't care.

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Have you ever found something disgusting in your food? My brother.

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What is the best and worst feeling in the world? Chelsea winning and Kylie Minogue knocking at my door.

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Maximum of 3 words for the kind of day you are having. Tired drunken fun.

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Do you actually like something about the person you dislike the most? Yes , I like the fact I can't stand him. Good question though mate.

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Can a zombie run for president? Not run but stagger slowly.

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I hate working , i mean i HATE working , how can i make money and be lazy at the same time? Be a member of Parliament.

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I found out my best mate was gay with my brother what do i do? Cry.

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Who is most good looking person? Me.

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What is the one question that you should never ask a woman? Why does your bum look so big in that ?

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How fast does gossip travel in your workplace? At the speed of sound.

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Is Osama Bin Laden the greatest terrorist ever? How can a terrorist be great ,don't you mean the worst.

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What does your AB name mean? The best football team in the world and my first name basically.

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What's the best way to keep a eye contact? Neck brace.

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Is six inches enough? No , always go for the full Subway.

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I am a woman and enjoy watching lesbian porn and thinking about girl on girl when i get myself off. I've never been attracted to another woman only guys. I would never want to have sex with a woman. Does this make me a lesbian or bi? You maybe bi-sexual.

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Wht could i do to try and hint to my girlfriend tht i want to kiss her? Knock on her door and when she answers go like this.

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What kind of iPod do you have? Ipod classic and i love it. The screen froze on it the other day and I was in hysterics.

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What part of a woman' s body do you find the most attractive, the mouth, eyes, hair, ankles, legs, 'chest', hands, 'posterior', or feet? boosy whackers.

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How do you pleasure a man without sex? Buy him a pint.

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Guys: Whats the best thing you like to hear from your girl, when having sex? God , big boy !!!!

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Would you like to have your picture in the newspaper? Depends what for !! I've been in our town newspaper loads of times for playing football and i'd be a liar if i said it wsn't nice.

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What do you wish would just go away? A repetitive day.

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At this moment in time, what expression do you have on your face? Pensive.

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After you finish your shower....what is the first piece of clothes you put on? Willy warmer.

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Im working on a project and im using photoshop. i need a name for like a condom company, any suggestions? Smokin' Rubber.

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If you fell into a bottomless pit, what would you do on the way down? A super powered botty burp to return me to the top.

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Fastest man ever? Me when last orders bell is rung at the bar.

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AWhat are three little words that you WOULDN'T like to hear from your sweetie? I've pooped myself.

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What's the strangest thing you've ever seen an animal do? One bored orangutang.

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Women: what is the sexiest part of a woman's body? Boosy Whackers. They make my boxer shorts stretch.

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Whats the website to deport a illegal immigrant..... www.thefuzz.com

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What gets on ur last nerves? Selfish people.

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What is the rock cooking? Rock cakes.

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Why is there violence in this world? Ignorance.

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What is Herpes Zoster Oticus? A Trapeze artist.

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How do u define 'date'? Horrible squishy fruit always left to last in a Christmas Hamper.

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My mom is half Creole, a quarter Italian, and a quarter Irish. My dad is half Native American and half white. What am I considered? A kaleidoscope.

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What is the name of the county you live in? And yes, I mean county not country. Sussex ( West ).

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Why is my pee hot sometimes when it comes out? It should be the same temperature as your body. You may have a slight infection that is causing a burning sensation.

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What do you think of the recent absence of really good questions on Answerbag? Recent !!!!!!!!!!!!

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If you could destroy the world just by pressing a button would you do. No way , I'm going to see Oasis in a few weeks time !!

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Yesterday evening I had to chase Stanley the Beagle for over an hour through the woods and underbrush in the rain. What's your most trying (or heartwarming) experience catching an escaped animal? We were in Ireland once and my uncle lost his Collie dog . He was in bits about it and my aunt just couldn't stop crying. We searched the woods and fields for two days to no avail. The day after I took a walk to the shop , which was about a mile away. As I walked back I happened to look down a side lane and in the distance I saw Tara ( the dog ) limping towards me !! When i got her back to...

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WHAT'S 4n - 2n = 8. An equation.

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I want to know if I can file for an annulment based on the grounds that my spouse refused to reveal the full impropriety of a sexual act with a minor prior to our marriage and also for refusing to reveal his criminal record of alcohol abuse. No , you should just learn to be a better judge of character.

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You get it right i will give u max points, but get it wrong you will only get two. Lets say you are marching a company worth of men and you are only one foot step away from falling off the cliff. What COMMAND do you give to stop them where they are at? F***ING STOP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Does it rain a lot where you live? I live in England , is there something else that can happen then ?

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Name at least three favorite things you have in common with your spouse or significant other. Drink problem , big belly and big boobs.

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Can you describe Santa in one word? Overweight.

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Do you think that a goal celebration should result in a booking? No way mate. If I ever scored the winner against Rottenham Hotspur I'd strip off totally and do cartwheels in front of their supporters.

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What's the biggest worm you have ever seen?(In inches) Gary Glitter , about 72 inches.

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What do you think your evil twin is doing right now? Crop Circles.

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Why would my ex girlfriend send me an email asking "When can I get my bowl back?" We recently broke up and she said she just wants to be alone for a while She may need it for her hairdresser so she can cut her hair.

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I need a list of country music videos to keep me busy on youtube? Anything by Bosshoss. Search them on Youtube.

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How do you know if you have a ghost in your house? Is there any way of contacting them or banishing them? You'll know if you've got a ghost because you'll hear " WOOOOOOOOOO !! " in the middle of the night. If you do , call Ghostbusters.

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What would you take from your house if it was on fire and you could only take one thing? My parents.

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How can you make feel women happy? Open my wallet.

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Why do cats get so crazy after they poo? They've lost something inside and the s***s hit the fan.

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What would Michael Jackson look like without plastic surgery? A rolling pin.

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Most of the men here on AB are such gentlemen. Why can't it be like that in reality? It's a Mad World unfortunately. Good question , and I'm a man !!

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Did you like eating your carrots when you were a kid Yep , can't you tell ?

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What is one thing every teenager should know? Chelsea are the best football team.

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Is it harmful to drink two glasses of red wine a night? Raspberries , they look like nipples.

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Why does my rabbit poop look like peanut size Why are you doing rabbit poops ?

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What do you usually do after you eat dinner? Fart.

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What is the most watched DVD in your collection? Quadrophenia.

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Why do I have 114 emails? You're a bear and you've been hibernating.

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What is your favorite song to rock out to? Cigarettes and Alcohol - Oasis.

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What are the similarities between American football and European football (soccer)? If you mean soccer and football , nothing.

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Why, in some neighborhoods are there a pair of shoes strewn over the power lines? Are they Nike Shox ?

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What was the last professional sports game you attended? Chelsea v Portsmouth in the English Football Premier League.

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Looking for a good name for a resturant that is catchy and appealing and full of zing. Food served will be all kinds of Indian cusines. Saffron Gardens.

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What is something that starts with the letter T that i could dress up as for a party? Turd. Tart. Tree. Tyranasauras Rex. Telephone.

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What are you thinking of right now? Of how my badly bruised ribs are killing me.

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I have a boyfriend, and now a days i get annoyed of him easily, i dont want to talk to him and we talk about our future but now i know we wont have that future at all; Is this possibly a sign that i dont like him anymore? I think i should break up. Sounds like your mind is made up already and you're just looking for a final judgement.

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What has George Bush been up to lately? Orchestrating the puppets on The Muppet Show.

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What question do you hate being asked on a job interview? Have you got a big willy.

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What does it mean, “to lead one on?” To make someone think they have a chance of something when you know in your mind that's not the case.

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How did you choose your Answerbag name (assuming its not actually your name, that is!)? I love Chelsea Football Club and my name's Mark !! Boring I know !! :-)

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What could I say or do to make you blush? " God , that's the biggest one I've ever seen !! "

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What are you into? Chelsea Football Club and Oasis ( music ).

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What gets replaced the most in your refrigerator? Lager !!

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Overall, why is AB such a pleasant place to hang out? It makes me laugh and when I laugh the sun shines.

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When you have computer problems who do you call or go to? Friends at work usually.

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What do u think about people with hair highlights with strange colours, like pink or purple? Exhibitionists. However it doesn't bother me.

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How long have you had your current hairstyle? Next door neighbours had hers for twenty minutes. Her kettle blew up.

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Have you ever had to run from any animal? An ex-girlfriend , fat cow.

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First thing that comes to mind when I say "Disco"? This song from Shed Seven.

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Can you laugh at yourself when something embarassing happens to you? Most definitely , I'd never laugh otherwise !! I'm the most clumsy person going.

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Does your job exhaust you? Yes I'm a postman and suffer from fatigue all the time which usually results in bad moods.

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Do you agree or disagree that "your eyes tell your life story"? Disagree, my life hasn't been red and bleary !! :-D

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Can you forgive, and forget, if not Why? Time.

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What is the one quality you look for when you decide to be friends with someone? Unselfishness.

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Here's a challenge! Can any of you write a reasonable sentence, without using a word containing more than 5 letters? My cow done a poop on my mate's head.

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Wut is the best album of all time? Definitely Maybe - Oasis.

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How are you/were you viewed in the eyes of your classmates? Cheeky chappy.

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If you awoke in the middle of the night and your s/o was naked, shaving his/her head in the bathroom with a butchers knife, and softly uttering words in latin, what would you do? Jump out of the window.

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Men: Why do you playfully kick or tease/mess a girl but not other girls? Because you fancy them.

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If some old friends were to drop in on you today what would you do? Turn the telly down and dive on the floor , I'm knackered.

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In Greek mythology, what did Jason and the Argonauts search for? Bin Laden.

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What cd's should I get for my itunes library? Oasis - Definitely Maybe.

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Who would you say is the most beautiful person you have ever seen? Kelly Brook.

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Don't you hate it when you meet someone with no sense of humor? Definitely . Humour makes life a lot more bearable.Smile , it will make you feel better.

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Who is the first person you remember intensly hating, and why? My best mate when I was six. I lent him my bike which I'd just got for Christmas and he brought it back with a puncture.

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What do you believe never happened in our history? Elliot met ET.

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What preventions are you taking to avoid getting wrinkles? Sleep on a stretch bed.

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What's the longest amount of time you've had to wait in the doctor's waiting room for an appointment? Me- an hour and a half. Not a doctors but at a hospital I waited in a&e for three and a half hours once waiting for the results of an x-ray to be told that they'd overlooked me. It was the hottest day of the year and I was not impressed.

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Can I break-dance on your head? Can I put some stiletoes on and do the Riverdance on your willy ?

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I haven't had any alcoholic drinks in over 7 days already; should I celebrate tonight by drinking quite a few brews? Wow , yes !! I ask this after 7 hours !! :-D

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Is there one question you would never answer? How big's your willy.

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Are there any countries that have never went to war The Vatican.

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What is Samuel Johnson most famous for? He was a superb English writer compared to Shakespeare at times . There's a pub two miles from me named after him.

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How do I prevent cats from entering my balkony? Pepper on the entry places.

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If you could meet (in person) any other Answerbagger, who would it be? Everyone in one massive hall with one massive bar.

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Can you name a song title starting with the letter "P"? Penny Lane - The Beatles.

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Who are the three soccer players who won the English Premiership, were relegated from the English Premiership, and who have scored in the World Cup finals? Bryan Robson , Damian Duff and Joe Cole.

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What is the most polite term to use when referring to one's private parts? Meat and two veg.

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A sure sign the date is not going well? When you come back from the toilet she's pissed off.

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My boyfriend of a year wants to take a break for a week? Sorry to say this but it usually means the end. Obviously I hope it's not for your sake.

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In your opinion, what is the worst quality a person could have? Selfishness.

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What's a Good excuse to tell my boss why I am late to work today? Back problem. It wouldn't get off your bed.

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Want to find out how many people in the US have your name go to http://howmanyofme.com/search/ there are 0 people with my first name and their are 2,357 with my surname which makes it the 13,124th popular name in the US. 43.

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How do you, personally, define "poser"? Show off.

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Is the term "newbie" condescending? Yes , I've always been a believer that we're all the same. I feel this puts new people under a bit of undue pressure. Most new people ask and answer better than me !!

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The song "no woman no cry" by Bob Marley - does that mean he does not have a woman but not going to cry or he is telling his woman not to cry? His woman left a little while after this and took the telly. He then started singing " No Woman No Sky ".

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Do you have a special song that you love to hear often? This never fails to make the hairs stand up on my neck....Pink Floyd-Wish You Were Here.

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Who is the most critical of you? Bosses at work , and you know what, I don't give a poop !!

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What is your most embarrasing secret celebrity crush ever? Corrrr !!!!

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What would Dolly Parton's married name be if she married Salvador Dali? What are some other goofy marriages that come to mind? Whoopi Goldberg and Gerard Depardieu. She'd be Whoopi Doopy do.

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Tomorrow's newspaper headlines will be all about you! What's it all about? What did you do? ChelseaMark marries Scarlett Johansson.

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What is your spirit animal? White tiger.

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Which artist/band live concert could you go to over and over again that you have already seen or would like to see? Oasis , just got tickets this morning . It will be my tenth time.

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Whats the best way to get over an ex? If she's big and fat , put a trampoline behind her and run and spring your hardest.

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What do you do when your tired of it all? Have a beer and a good long sleep.

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Why it is important to acknowledge and learn from your mistakes So you don't make them again !!

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What makes you do the happy dance? Getting tickets to see Oasis which I've just done , they sold out in half hour.

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Name 3 things in your home that is red? Girlfriends smacked botty. My face when Nan's round and I do a botty burp. Tomato Ketchup.

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Can you think of a song that's about getting married? I'm getting married in the morning from My Fair Lady... I have no idea who the people are in the photos !!!!!

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Can you tell me the name of songs that contain the word November please. Here you go.....

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Jade Goody found out in the indian version of Big Brother that she has cervial cancer. what do you think of that? Doesn't matter how much I didn't like a person , I would never wish cancer on another human being.

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I complimented my girl on her alligator shoes...well it turns out she was barefoot... HOW can I make this up to her? Take her out for a meal and make it snappy !!

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Is it still only considered proper to wear black to a funeral? No , dress sense , in England anyway, seems a lot more relaxed at a funeral although a lot of people do still choose black.

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Would you share some vidoes of your favorite football goals? American football or regular football (soccer) goals welcomed! This ain't bad.

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If there is really a bigfoot out there, how come we have yet to find his poop? He eats it.

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If I were to ask you to pick a decade, can you give me what you consider to be the most momentous event of that decade? The sixties. My birth !!

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Favourite Kinks song?? Mine's 'Lola' =) Waterloo Sunset.

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Do you think its okay for athletes born in one country to compete for another country during the Olympics? No. I think anyone who represents their country in whatever sport should've been born in that country. To me it just isn't the same if they win something.

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If u could choose your skin color.. what would it be...???? mine would be purple... yeah thats crazy..haha what aboutu? Yellow , so I could go on the piss with Barney.

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What's the point of showering, looking for a job, taking care of yourself and your relationships, if at the end of the day you'll just end up being in the same depressing room you left? Move your room round , it works wonders , trust me.

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What is one thing you would never change about your life? My football team and who I am.

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Are you on AB to avoid doing chores and other things that need doing? Yes , basic living.

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If you drink a whole bottle of red wine, how do you feel the next day? Crap.

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If you were asked to choose an ABer to fall in love with, who would that be? lets be truthful =) Myself.

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Do you rely on asking or answering to earn points on answerbag? Answering , no one answers my questions , they're crap.

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If president bush was a type of food, what food would he be? Blancmange.

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How important to a man is the size of a woman's breasts? Is too small or too big a turn off? If he's happy you should be. Imagine if he kept hinting you should have an op ? You'd feel worse then . It's not the end and be all.

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Has another ABER ever been mean to you and hurt your feelings and what did you do about it? Don't ever let that happen , just go onto another subject and don't get involved. There's always bad apples in an enjoyable environment. DON'T let them get to you , laugh it off , you don't know them personally , they're basically cowardly cyber bullies.

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What is your all time favorite album or CD? Definitely Maybe - Oasis.

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Do you believe in aliens? Yes , havn't you seen ET ?

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What drives you crazy about your boss? How we know the job better than them and they get double our salary.

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Do you feel like you are the black sheep of your family? If so, how do you deal with it? Don't let it baa-ther me.

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What, if any is your favorite movie from the '80's? ET.

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What's your favorite event in the Summer Olympics? There are loads to be honest but if I had to pick one it would have to be the athletics , especially the track races.

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What time does evening start? I'd say 6pm.

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What are some of the funniest occurrences of flatulence that you can remember in your life? Watching this naughty little monkey !!

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Where can I get some good information about birdwatching? (books, online, etc.) http://www.rspb.org.uk/

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If you could be a member of any band, which would you choose? OASIS !! All day long !!

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Do you enjoy riding your bike? No , because I'm a postman and it's for work !!

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Do you say lift or elevator? I'm from England so it's lift.

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Sometimes do you just feel like monkeying around? What do you do to monkey around? Blow off in people's faces.

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You have been unemployed for eighteen months. You get a job offer to pick up dead bodies (freeway accidents) making $23 an hour. Would you take the job? Good question , but no. I nearly throw up when mates send me gory e-mails. Don't even like to see someone break a bone.

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Internet explorer or Mozilla Firefox? I use Internet explorer but just found out that Firefox was rated an 84 out of 100 in the internet acid test while IE got a 19. Which do you use? Firefox , much safer and faster. That's what I've found. When I used to run an adaware scan after using IE It always found critical items I had to remove. Never get that with firefox. Also Firefox has an add-on where you can switch to IE at the click of a mouse so if you don't get it you're silly.It's free after all.

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Is there a way to make an alcoholic to stop drinking ? Like making him take some pills or something? There is something they can have implanted in their stomach.

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Would you eat human if it was legally offered to you? No , I ate a clown once and it tasted really funny.

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Who else would like to be a member of the AB nudist colony? Yes please !!

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Who agrees that trust is the most important aspect of a relationship? Definitely.

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What were you doing 15 minutes ago? Eating my Sunday dinner and very nice it was as well.

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Are you taller than your refrigerator? No way , wouldn't get all my beer in !!

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Would you be interested in chasing the dragon? Where is he and how big is he ?

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What is a rock garden? It's where Status Quo grow vegetables.

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What does your partner repetitvely do that annoys you? Rip rap farts.

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Are you happy being single? Yes , more than happy. Had a couple of relationships that ended badly and now personally love the stress free life now.

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How do I get on national TV? Streak at a football match.

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How do you start your Saturday or Sunday morning? Wake up.

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What is a "stitch" and how do you prevent it from happening? A load of them make up a wooly jumper. Hide your nan's knitting needles.

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Do dogs like being dressed up in clothing I dunno. You decide...... stuffonmymutt.com

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What is the story behind your avatar and/or nickname? No meaning , just went through a avatar site and it stood out and I had to have it.

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How come Dinosaurs was not mentioned in Genesis. Phil Collins hated them.

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What was the last thing that made you angry? My horses all coming last !!

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What is a good indoor mosquito repellent that can be applied to your skin? A Manchester United Tattoo.

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WHATS WRONG WITH TEENS SOMEKING POT You'll learn.

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Why Do Some People Insist On Capitalizing Every Word In The Sentence? IT'S ALPHABETICAL SHOUTING WITH RAGE CONNOTATIONS !!

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LeBron James has guaranteed an Olympic gold medal for the US basketball team. Do you think it was wise of him to make this guarantee? There's nothing wrong with confidence and self belief but i think these aspirations should be kept behind closed doors in the company of your team. Bold predictions like this can come back to haunt you so why risk it. It can also have an adverse effect on your team as in added pressure.

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Why did God create animals to be normal but humans to be crazy? Do you call this normal ? I've never done this in the morning.

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What do you think is the weirdest song of all time? This was just mad and it got to number one in England !!

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What happens if you drink too much water? You then explode and flood your town.....

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Where is the warmest place in the house? The oven.

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If you had a knock on your door one day, and when you answered it, it was God, what would be the first thing you tell him? You're not Avon are you?

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What's the most soothing song you've heard? This lovely song.

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Where are you right now, the place and state? Bedroom , in my house , in Crawley , England.

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I'm undecided, should I purchase an I Pod? Best thing I ever got.

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What has been your lowest rated answer or question on AB? Hundreds of noughts and quite a few -5's. It's been a long hard ride.

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How do you get an avatar on your profile? Go to edit your profile. Browse your files for a picture you want as your avatar and simply upload it and submit.

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Whats in your toilet? Poo poo. I'm on it on a laptop.

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Can you eat/drink something on the day of the expire date? Course you can. I eat stuff a couple of days after the expiry date. Thats the companies being super safe.

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I reallly want my Boyfriend to be more aggressive; how can i mkae him want to be more "frisky"? Scorpion in his pants.

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Could you do a speech in front of 100,000 people? No way. I've been Best Man at two weddings and those two speeches were the worst experience of my life.

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I've heard that the 23rd of December 2012 the world's gonna end again Good , cheap Christmas.

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Name your "personal" cult movie. Seen it TONS of times, know everything about it, and still try to find new stuff. You bought the VHS, then the "special yedition" DVD. The one you plague your friends to see 'cause they don't know what they're missing? :o) Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

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Will you shake that a^s for me? Ok but hold on to your ornaments.

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When applying ice to a swollen area, would it be better if I apply it directly to the ice without a kitchen cloth covering it? I don't think it's cold enough with the cloth on. Or should I keep the cloth overit? Best thing to use is a bag of frozen peas.

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Any1 know the exact lyrics to californiacation and who its by? Californication - The Red hot Chilli Peppers. Psychic spies from China Try to steal your mind's elation Little girls from Sweden Dream of silver screen quotations And if you want these kind of dreams It's Californication It's the edge of the world And all of western civilization The sun may rise in the East At least it settles in the final location It's...

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Why is it a bad idea to date someone that you work with? I personally wouldn't because it's just a great excuse for gossip and if you split , well , it's not gonna be the best situation.

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To sell your home what would be the three top things you would do to improve the home to make it sell better? Chuck the other squatters out. Paint the dustbin and take the Playboy posters down off the frontroom wall.

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What was the last thing you bought that was a Big Splurge? A £200 digital camera when I was drunk. Glad I got it though.

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When do you feel like you are a thousand miles away? When I recall my regrets in life.

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Do you think it's bad manners and/or inconsiderate to visit friends without asking first if it's okay to? Yes , I've had it happen and my place was like a bomb had hit it. I was so embarrassed.

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Ok, let's say I'm running for President of the USA - what do I have to say and/or do to get your vote? Free hot dogs on Saturdays.

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Where have all the monkeys gone? They're on the Last Train To Clarksville.

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Don't ever date someone who...______________...what? died last week.

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Is "Who Let the Dogs Out" by the Baha Men the worst song of all time? It's better than this !!

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You know it is time to leave AB and go to bed when ___________? the birds start singing.

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What are the top 3 things you should NEVER say to your gf/bf? Your arse is getting fat. I've run out of beer , can you run down the off licence for me and Blimey , your sister's a stunna.

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I live in Mexico. My friend is 'Chewy'. What is that short for? Chewy sweet.

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Whats your favorite rock band? Oasis.

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What is your favorite book? It - Stephen King.

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What is so hot about Olive Oil..that she has two men fighting over her? Have you seen another woman in it ?

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Which is your favourite hip-hop / rnb song? Grandmaster Flash - White Lines.

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Does anyone you know who looks exactly like a celebrity? Yes , me.

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What is the person you love doing right now? Making another film probably..

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If a psychiatrist gave you an evaluation based on your AB answers and comments, what would it say about you? Complete nutter. And then Jack Nicholson would come in and take me out on a boat trip.

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What family tradition are you the most proud of? Farting after Christmas dinner.

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What does your swimsuit look like? Post a pic. What d'yer reckon ?

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What kind of people do you dislike? Tottenham supporters.

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Do you ever think that a new category on AB will ever be named after one of the users? Be creative. (sm00zisms) Sarcy Marky has a ring to it.

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Be honest now. How many of you actualy listened to and enjoyed Johnny Cash before Walk the Line came out? Me , me , me , he's brilliant.

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Is there a song that the lyrics make absolutely no sense to you? I AM THE WALRUS - THE BEATLES. I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together. See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they fly. I'm crying. Sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come. Corporation tee-shirt, stupid bloody Tuesday. Man, you been a naughty boy, you let your face grow long. I am the eggman (woo), they are the eggmen (woo), I am the...

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Do you look at the category a question is in when you answer it? Or just go for the gold? I never do , and it's been my downfall many a time !!

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My boyfriend has never french kissed a girl, I have frenched a couple guys...Well he asked me to and I don't know how to go about kissing him, seeing as he's never kissed a girl like this before...any advice? Just do what comes naturally , don't stick your tongue in too far though !!

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The other day one of my regular guest who comes into the Bar tipped me a Joint. I took it because I didn't want to be rude. What would you have done? Take it , go outside , rip it up and throw it in the bin.

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Do you like Pink Floyd? Used to think that when I was younger but as I've got older my music taste has matured and now I can't get enough. The live album 'Pulse' is permanently on my Ipod. How can you not like this !!

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Sitting here watching "The Godfather" on AMC for the first time. #'s 2 & 3 are on tomorrow and Tuesday. Which is the best, 1.2 or three. Haven't seen any yet although #1 is pretty good so far. Order with which they came out. Stick with it , the whole collection is a masterpiece.

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If you looked out your window and saw your sexy neighbor getting dressed or having sex, would you watch? Would you ?

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Do you have a favourite Motown song?? what is it - post videos please! :) Love this.

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In text language what does Aug mean. Thanks x I'll do it this month.

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In text language what does Aug mean. Thanks x August ?

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Would you go to an art exhibition called 'Pubes on Canvas'? Will the hair conditioning be on ?

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What does a 350lb woman and a pile of bricks have in common? They'll break bones if they land on you.

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Do u buleev iN space aliens? Yep , havn't you seen ET ?

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Are you addicted to something in particular? My football team , Chelsea.

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Where did the first olympics start? The original Olympic games were held in ancient Greece in the city of Olympia to honor the god Zeus. Only Greek speaking men were allowed to participate. The first records of the Olympic games dates back to 776 B.C. but it is pretty certain they were held prior to this. The games were held until Roman emperor Theodosius I banned them in 393 A.D. It took 1503 years until 1896 for the...

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The Greatest Love Song of all time? Joanna - Kool and the Gang.

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Where are the pictures of your ex? Shredder.

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Who else loves it when that blue "Friends' Q&A" turns orange at times? Yeah , it's nice that people show an interest , it's only natural you should get a warm glow.

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Have you ever lost your temper at work? Every day !!

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When an indirect free kick is taken, should the ball roll or can just be touched without it moving and the second player scores the goal from there? No , the ball has to move. I think you'll find it's got to move it's full circumference along the ground.

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What are the signs of a carrot overdose? It's hideous. Look what carrot juice done to my poor little boy.

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Fingering? Not at the moment.

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Has anyone ever eaten Pet food? did you like it? I used to eat dog food all the time but gave it up because I started having wee wees against trees in broad daylight.

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Does anyone know where to find the song "Ice Girl" Is this it ?

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What's the first song that comes to mind when I say Guns 'N Roses? November Rain . A classic.

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Life is a....What? Emotional rollercoaster.

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Have you bought the new Coldplay album, Viva la vida? Yes , and very good it is as well. Highly recommend.

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What's your favorite food combination? Steak and chips with tomatoes , onions and mushrooms.

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Whats your favorite breakfast combo? The good old English breakfast for me.

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How can i jump high? Step on hot coals in bare feet.

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Are suicide bombers a bunch of idiots with no future? Yes , but it all blows up in their face in the end.

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What is Alvar Aalto best known for? Being the first person in a telephone directory.

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Can you give me an example of a situation where "one size fits all" actually works? A small fart.

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I have a quilt question Is this a cover up ?

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What do you think of secret love affairs? Cowardly and totally uncalled for. If you're gonna do that you are not worthy of the person you are with , imagine if it happened to you !!

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What is your favourite musical? Oliver. Can't beat it.

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Is it wrong not to want to argue? No , always best to walk away. The other person usually won't come to your point of view so why bother ?

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Who was the best teacher you ever had? Mrs . Marcam , six times in one night.

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Guys: boxers, briefs, boxer briefs, tighty whitey's, thongs, womens underwear, nothing? When do you wear which? Boxer shorts , keep my humungous willy in , purple.

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If you were a street, what would your name be? Madman Close.

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Once you have more money, it causes more problems than before. True or false? Depends how much it is . Countless lottery winners have now said it ruined their life. More money to the extent you can afford a few luxuries and live in comfort is ideal in my eyes.

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With the price of gas over $4.00, do you still go to restaurants? Who orders gas in a restaurant ?

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What is the deal with all the anti-American rhetoric on this site? Do you realize that you wouldn't even be on the internet without us? And you wouldn't have heard of The Beatles if it wasn't for.........

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Whats the best way to ask your boss about your annual review? (note: he perfers emails for everything) If I don't get a rise this year sir , it's gonna be a sparrow for Christmas dinner.

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What is the big deal about boobs ??? guys can you tell us . A girlfriend asked me this once and you know what , I couldn't answer her then !! THEY'RE JUST GREAT !!

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Do we really want our leaders to be just like us? Or do we want them to be smarter, wiser and better able to make the tough decisions? What you've got to remember Rosie is half the decisions are not made by them. In a way they're puppets to their backroom advisers.

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If you had to draw on the walls of a room of your house,what would you paint and which room? I'd paint the Chelsea crest on the tiles in my bathroom.

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If someone says "comfort food", what comes to mind? Something you eat topped with fabric conditioner.

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I'm working on my online dating profile and am pretty much stuck on the section where you have to talk about what you've learned from previous relationships. I've never been in one. What should I put down? Not applicable.

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Whose parents you like the most besides yours?and why? Bart Simpson's .... they're funny.

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What's your favorite song at this exact minute? Wish You Were Here ..... Pink Floyd.

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Which lead singer also had their own tv series? Donny Osmond.

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Would you care if you were fat or skinny or wouldnt care at all? Yes , I've been off work now with a broken collarbone for three months and I've put on weight and I hate it.

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Has anyone ever dedicated you a song?for what reason?what song?did you like it? A ' friend' dedicated this to me on Facebook and no , I didn't really like it !!

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What's the longest time you have INTENTIONALLY remained single? About three years now, had a couple of really bad experiences and now love the stress free single life . I'll meet someone again but at the moment I love my comfort zone , but that's just me , the previous relationships scarred me mentally.

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What did the Police want last time they were at your house? My nan . Held up the local supermarket again with her knitting needles.

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Where do you pick your questions from? A booze frazzled mind.

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What's the best thing to use to unclog my pipes? Have a good poop.

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Are you an Answerbag user who is over 60 + years old? Two thirds of the way there.

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Would you ever turn down a job promotion? Yes , because I 'm a postman and the only promotion would be manager and seeing how much they're despised !! No thanks !!

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Why can't I get to sleep right now? (any zany answer will do) Take the George Bush poster down.

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What is the rudest statement anyone has said to you? Do you support Manchester United ?

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Do you think the US soccer league will ever be as strong as the leagues in other countries such as Great Britain and Italy? No way . Your other sports are too popular.

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What song would you want played at your funeral? Already decided , this one.

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If you do not vote in elections, why? The polling station was a mile away and it was raining.

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What size and type of SD card is needed for a Sony Cybershot 4.1 Megapixel camera? Your help would be very appreciated. Sony Memory Stick or Memory Stick Pro.

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How about incest How about don't go there !

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What would you do if you knew you were on camera?... act the fool, magic, sing, what? Act the fool definitely , can't help it !!

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With pizza .... Coke? or Beer? Beer , beer with everything !!

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Is it true that cockroaches clean themselves after a human has touched them? They better not the cheeky gits !!

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What do you think my bed sheets look like? The Turin Shroud.

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When you think of your childhood, what comes to mind? Playing and going to watch football.

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When you think of England what comes to your mind? Lager and football.

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What is your favorite Shalamar song? An obvious choice I know but Night To Remember.

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How do you break your arm? Why do you want to know how to do that ? Avoid it at all costs is my answer !!

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Have broken any body parts if so what I'm currently recuperating after a broken collarbone. I've been off work for 3 months and I'm bored stiff. It was the first bone I'd broken in forty years.

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What is the best song about men or a man? Billy Joel - Innocent Man.

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What could cause horrible headaches in the back of the head, feeling lightheaded, fainting and numbness in my face and right arm? Blimey , get down the doctors , this could be the warning signs of a stroke or an illness related to the brain.

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How do angels reproduce? On the wings of love.

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Do people still sing the happy birthday song to you, on your birthday ? When was the last time someone did? On my fortieth in a packed pub , I died.

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If you were to rob a bank how would you plan it? Secretly.

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Can you name me a song with a animal in the title? How much is that doggie in the window ?

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Have you ever changed your screen name here? if so did people still recognize you? I changed once and yes they sure did !!

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Have you or your co-workers ever charted your supervisor's "bad mood" days against a calendar to see if they run in cycles? Don't need to , it would be a straight red line at all times , the miserable s*** !!

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I need to get a Blow Up Doll by this Saturday..Do you know where I can find one? Talltart. Wallmart's new sex shop.

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Have you ever told a woman, "I want you to have my baby"? Yep , but only once.

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What is the worst beer that you have ever tasted? Kaliber , it was ALCOHOL FREE !!! YUCK !!!!!

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What is the most insane thing you have ever done to get that cute guy or gal to notice you? A moony.

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What is your favourite Beatles song? Strawberry Fields.

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According to the BMI charts are you underweight, normal weight, overweight, or obese and do you agree with the BMI charts? Google search BMI to calculate if you don't know already. I'm overweight , cheers , you got me worried now.

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Which actress would make the best buddy? Jennifer Annison ( Friends !! )

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How do astronauts go to the bathroom in space with no gravity? They don't , this is their underwear once they land on earth.

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Our news just finished a story about a woman who claims to have found a Cheetos Jesus. Do you believe that Jesus and the Saints put their pics on sandwiches, snack foods, etc.? If so, why would they WANT to put their likeness on foods? It's silly to me. They've been a wafer too long.

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What is disgusting to you? Bear poop.

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If your singing a song right now, what is it? This masterpiece . Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here.

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What are your favorite ingredients to put in a omelette? Cheese , ham and mushrooms.

| 1 person likes this

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Aside from the ones with long hair, why do we bathe our dogs? Wolves don't take baths in the wild do they? If they roamed around your house you'd soon have them in the bath.

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Has anyone ever told you that you're weird? They don't say anything but !!

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When you were 10, What did you want to be? A footballer for Chelsea.

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Asume somone is watching us from outer space, what could they learn from us? How to destroy everything around us because of ignorance.

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Do you have the body that you want? No , Scarlett Johansson won't come round.

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Ia an honest person a sucker? In this day and age it can sometimes feel like that but I'm sticking to it.

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No sleep till ___? My girlfriend get's off me.

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What are you downloading at the moment? My girlfriends underwear.

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Who is a musician you enjoy listening to when you want to relax? The Smiths.

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What witty slogans will the media come up with when Jesus comes back? SUPERMAN RETURNS !! Complete with beard.

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In relationships,why would you find cheating wrong? Would you like it if it happened to you.

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How do you think angel wings would smell like? Heavenly.

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What website do you visit when you're done on AB? Facebook , to lose pool against people from all around the World !!

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What are some good U.S. rock groups that don't come from the bigger, more traditional music markets? (L.A., N.Y., etc.) I know this lot come from New York but I don't know anything about US music and threw this lot in because their new album rocks !! http://www.myspace.com/theholdsteady

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Who do you make drunken phone calls to? Supporters of other football teams when we beat them !!

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What was the name of the large rooster/chicken with a heavy southern accent from the cartoons i used to watch Foghorn Leghorn.

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Who broke the nose off the Great Sphinx? He asked for it to be broken off because the tourists kept farting and it was causing great stinks.

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Who is in "denile" that this word is not in the Ab dictionary? De crocodiles are in De Nile.

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Which sharks are not dangerous? Rubber or plastic ones.

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Someone I know wets the bed in his sleep after a night of partying and getting drunk. It's a habit he either cannot control or isn't aware of. Is this common? And how can he put a stop to it, if he ever wanted to. He's simply drinking too much.

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For Indie music lovers ; what band is a MUST to you? OASIS.

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What are the negative medical effects of eating soap for over 5 years. Farting bubbles.

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Can you unscramble this what is hestchair and hellybairs Chesthair and bellyhairs ?

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A recent survey told us that Denmark is the “happiest” country in the world, but how can they be if the income tax is 64%!? Money isn't everything.

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Anyone here from the uk Me , me , me... Crawley , Sussex , Southern England.

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Yesterday I gave this women at work that I have a huge crush on a gift card to olive garden because it was her favorite resturant and she was all like that was so smooth what did she mean by that does she like me more now Think she probably meant good try , but thanks anyway to be honest. She still would've appreciated it, but at the same time being politely standoffish . Hope I'm wrong for your sake though . :-)

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When i say ireland what comes into your head? Mum and Dad's spiritual home.

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What comes to mind when you hear "The Platters"? Smoke getting in my eyes.

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Whats on TV now? A vase with flowers in it and a photo of my family.

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Is there a 'connection' of sorts, between English Football Club, Tottenham Hotspur, and the local Jewish Community. Arsenal have more Jewish people involved with them.

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Who would be the worst possible person to have in the hospital room while you or your spouse was in labor? The Childcatcher out of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

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Is it normal to have a crush on your teacher Yeah , course it is. You're growing up. As long as that's as far as it goes , this will soon transfer to a relationship with someone your own age.

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If i were batman for a day,what will i do for the people? Warn everyone against smoking and drugs.

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Do you feel intimidated by AB members that have a high all time points tally? Yes I get so scared sometimes I have to resort to drastic measures.......

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Should used condoms go in the recyclables? Can't see where you're coming from.

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Of which member in AB are you afraid much? Me? Bless, Prof. Mes No one , there's no need to be afraid of someone you don't know who could be hundreds or thousands of miles away. If you do get this feeling just avoid and ignore them.

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In your opinion, why do so many marriages end in divorce? Money and increasing pressures in life.

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Where is the worst place to shout "I'm pregnant"? A nun's convent.

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What are your views on the mentally insane? Have to say they're ok , I live and work with them.

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Which comidean says 'knowing me knowing you aha? Alan Partridge.

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How many people on answerbag are full of shit? Just me.

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How many times has Cher been on the operating table? The answers in her kiss ...that's where it is !!!

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Which celebrity has the sexiest voice? I like Jodie Foster's voice.

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Why do guys seem to get over break-ups faster than girls? They don't , they're just good at hiding it.

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My name is Carol. I have a song that I always thought was written for me;'Oh, Carol' By Neil Sedaka. Whats your song? My mates reckon this was wrote for me. I have feelings you know.

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Would you come to the Foo Fighters concert with me? Definitely , and you won't spend a penny.

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Can you watch a sports game without shouting at the television? Not if it's my team Chelsea. They're like a religion to me.

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If a picture says a thousand words, What does my avatar say about me? & what does yours say about you? Yours says " Ghost " mine says totally bewildered and scared. Probably looked at your avatar.

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Whats your favorite rock band? OASIS.

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What's the funniest video on youtube that you have ever seen? A very hard question but this is one of them.

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Whats on your ipod? 250 albums from Frank Sinatra to The Sex Pistols.

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If you lost your family, friends, home, money, job....EVERYTHING today, where would you go first? The Samaritans.

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How do you feel about the fact Brad Pitt spent $300,000 on a coffee table? I say Jolie good luck to him.

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Whats the first thing that attracts you to the opposite sex? Bouncy Boosy Whackers in a Chelsea shirt.

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When the ice cream truck tours through your neighborhood, what do you usually get? Excited.

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It was reported in newspapers here in the UK that Peaches Geldof was found unconscious at the weekend after a drugs overdose.. do you think she is following in her mothers footsteps? Yep , and I wanna know what her dad's doing about it ?

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Who is your favorite female singer of any era? Dionne Warwick.

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Is there anyone on AB who scares you with their intelligence, wit or sarcasm? I still don't understand any of it.

| 1 person likes this

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What's your favorite song about (a) rainbow(s)? She's Like A Rainbow - The Rolling Stones. Without a doubt.

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What was the name of the fatman TV detective played by William Conrad? Cannon. ( Frank ).

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Don't you hate people who refer you to Wikepedea for your answer it's like you've not already looked there? If you've already looked there why do you feel the need to ask the question ?

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What should you not throw in a camp fire? Your nan.

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What is the sexiest picture you've seen on the internet? post them up :) Scarlett Johansson , click on image and drool.

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Is wearing a cleavage enhancing bra the same as lying? Nah . us guys see right through it,

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There's a Chinese guy working in a Chinese restaurant as griller, and he doesn't speak English and he get tips sometimes, and I teach him to say "You're so sweet" to any customer who gave him tips, and I just cracked up laughing, do you find it hilarious? It would be better if you taught him to say " Thank you hairy crotch ".

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Why cant i find my soul mate? Have you looked on the bottom of your shoe ?

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Does anyone know what year Gray O Brian starred in the british drama Casualty? His currently playing Tony Gordon in Corrie. Thanks. * 2000s * 1990s 1. "Coronation Street" .... Tony Gordon (86 episodes, 2007-2008) ... aka Corrie (UK: informal title) ... aka The Street (UK: informal title) - Episode #1.6854 (2008) TV episode .... Tony Gordon - Episode #1.6855 (2008) TV episode .... Tony Gordon - Episode #1.6853 (2008) TV episode .... Tony Gordon -...

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Will you post a random youtube video? There you go.

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What is a good song to dedicate to an ex? Fat Bottomed Girls - Queen.

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I'm trying to get into Pink Floid. Any Song suggestions? You don't have to try get into them , they're superb. Wish You Were Here.

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Which site do you hit first when you get online? I check my e-mails , then go to Facebook and then Answerbag.

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Ever tried Yahoo! Answers ? http://answers.yahoo.com/ i think it's better than AB by miles... i want to know your opinion ....thx How can you give a judgement , you've only been on here two minutes !!

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Would you stay with your partner if they caught an STD/HIV while cheating? I wouldn't stay with them full stop. I don't care what anyone says about cheating , a relationship is never the same again.

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Is there anything in you life tight now that you would love to get rid of if so what A spot on my nose.

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Can you name six ways that humans are better than chickens? Humans don't... 1. Sit in supermarket fridges covered in cellopane. 2. Give a cluck. 3. Poop everwhere. 4. Live in rooms with a hundred friends. 5. Listen to boring cows going on about BSE. 6. Have to audition for 'BABE'.

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Can a mice damage wooden furniture by its teeth? Most definitely. The field mice in our garden bit a hole through the side of our wooden shed.

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I have been started smoking cigarettes lately but can't seem to be hooked on it, I heard that once you get hooked on it you can't stop, but it's ok for me to stop and I don't feel a need for it, do I have a natural immunity, willpower against it or what? Don't carry on. It will get hold of you in the end. I smoked for twenty years and in the end my chest was wrecked. Given up for a year and a half now and I feel great once again.

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Tell us all which team you support and how you honestly think they will do next season. I support Leeds Utd and I think we will make the playoffs this year and with a couple more good players maybe pushing for automatic promotion (fingers crossed) I'm a Chelsea supporter and I honestly think we'll go one better in the Champions League this year.

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Do you often buy things from online? Music and books all the time.

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Songs that contain the word 'music' Thank you for the music- Abba.

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Are all Husky puppies born black? Not necessarily , this is a siberian husky puppy.

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If someone cheated on you does this mean that they do not love you? Not necessarily but it's selfishness in the highest degree in my book.

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White shoes during fall and winter? Yes or no? No , more likely to get dirty.

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Do you think, the Answerbag Top 5 of the week people, get Downrated more, since they are at the top? I never take any notice of who is in the top five !

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Name one thing that ticks you off about your job?!! Every

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What do you do when a girl tells you she hates pizza? How do you cope? I feel like topping myself (with extra cheese )

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Whats your goal for 2008? To lose some weight. If I put a pair of stiletoes on now I'd strike oil.

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Does your town or city have a local farmer's market? Yes , they've just started one funny enough and the food is quality.

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What is your honest opinion of Winnie The Pooh? Never trust anyone named after bum discharge.

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I am Mr Larry located in Italy, I offer Loan to those who are in need of fi nancial help Could you loan me twenty pizzas Mr Larry ?

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Do u poop a lot? Three times an hour after my girlfriends cooking.

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Opposed from being single, What do you refrain from doing when you are in a relationship. Farting around the in-laws.

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What was your worst experience with pizza that was delivered to your home? I was once at my house watching the FA CUP Final with a load of friends and we'd had a load of drink. The pizza lad arrived and my mate said he would sort it out. Anyway I've looked out of the window and saw my neighbours walking past with looks of horror on their faces . I went out into the hall and my nutter of a friend had taken off ALL his clothes and was telling the pizza lad he...

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Which is cuter puppies and kitties or babies? About the same , this is cute though.

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Will you hate me if I say I love your sister? No , I havn't got one.

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Who made the breakdance song,juice. and what album is it on/name of album please Is it Erik B and Rakim off the album Don't sweat the technique. Don't Sweat the Technique is the fourth and final album from influential hip-hop duo Eric B. & Rakim, released in 1992. The album builds on the sounds of 1990's Let the Rhythm Hit 'Em, with Rakim sounding more aggressive than ever on top of Eric B.'s jazzy, soulful production. The title track was a...

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Would you ever name your child Elvis? Er huh huh.

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What is the most you have ever won from gambling? eg: Lotto, sctratch n wins, casino, horse races £750 pounds on the horses.

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Say your flight was canceled, and you were stuck in the airport for 12 hours, what would you do while you waited? Fall asleep and miss it.

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WHAT WAS THE LAST WEBSITE YOU VISITED, RATE IT OUT OF 10? Facebook , 9.

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What was the first mistake that you ever made as a newbie on AB? Letting people I don't know get to me.

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What are the similarities between a woman and KFC? When I'm finished with them I throw them in the bin.

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If you could choose the eighth wonder of the world what would it be? Scarlett Johansson , because I look at her in awe every day.

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Why won't anybody answer my questions? Don't worry , no-one answers mine either, I just stick to answers now :-D Just plug on , ask interesting thought provoking questions and they'll come trust me. Whatever you do, don't take it personally. :-D

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"You don't have to lie to make friends." Do you know someone who feels the need to lie to be cool? I know a few and take them with a pinch of salt. Sometimes if they tell a huge one I'll go " Oh , leave it out " and it usually does the trick.

| 1 person likes this

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Is there one thing you can name that makes you most angry? Selfishness.

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What do you think about a women who has an affair with a married man? Scumbag. They'd be distraught if it happened to them.

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Do you live in the UK and if so which county? I'm in Sussex , Southern England.

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What is your fave HOLE song? Not sure , I'll have to look into it.

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I plan to paint the bathroom in my house. What kind of brush should I use? Other tips sincerely appreciated!! Bogbrush.

| 1 person likes this

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Can you describe the worst boss you ever worked for in as few words as possible? Thick slimey dickhead.

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My friend loves a typical Blonde, what should i do? Buy her a wig.

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How can you prove that China is real? Drop it. It makes a loud noise as it smashes.

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Is it true that you tan better when its coudy, rather then when its sunny? If you're at the seaside the sea breeze can definitely have an effect even though the sun is not blazing directly down on you.

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Who would win if we went to war with Iran? The Fantastic Four.

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What singer has a unique voice? Roy Orbison.

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Would you propose marriage to another AB member? I'd have to see her boobs first.

| 1 person likes this

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Can you check duffel bags at airports? I've never tried it.

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What do you do when everyone has forgotten about you? Re-invent yourself and show them what they're missing.

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Are you usually the first person to wake up in your house? Yes , I'm a postman !!

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Who is your favorite songwriter? Burt Bacharach or John Lennon.

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Which city do you think is the craziest to drive in? Dodge City.

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Do you know where Wales is? I'm four hours from there.

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I bought a new RAM card, So i overall have 1GB 256MB of RAM. When i look in system (Control Panel), it says i only have 1.24GB. Where has my RAM gone? Thats almost the same.

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What happened to white dog poo? Can you remember the days where there was once white chalky dog poo. Its allways brown now. Where did it go? Its a mystery like crap circles.

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What will you never forget? West Ham United are crap.

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Whats your opinion for greece? Love it , seen it twelve times.

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What color are your eyes? Crystal blue.

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What's the name of your favorite singer? Liam Gallagher - Oasis.

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What happens to my body if I don't eat? It ends up in a wooden box.

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Why do most Americans call them "koala bears"? Because that's what they're called.

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What's in your frig that you keep forgetting to throw out? My little brother.

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Hows my hair? Shocking.

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What is your FAVORITE breakfast? The good old full English breakfast.

| 4 people like this

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What is the worst sunburn outline you ever had? pictures maybe... Fell asleep drunk.

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Do you call your(mom)mommy or mom? Deceased.

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Whats your favorite song about animals? I like this one.

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If you found out your boyfriend kiss his ex-girlfriend on the mouth would you think is cheating? Well I wouldn't class it as normal behaviour. Kick him out.

| 1 person likes this

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During the Super Bowl halftime what would you rather watch: the halftime show, the lingerie bowl, or the puppy bowl? I go for a big poop.

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Is there an actor you feel is way overrated? Kermit the frog , he's crap.

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Have any tips on how to unplug your ear after a bad cold? I believe there is fluid behind my ear drum but I'm clueless as to how to get it out and it's driving me bananas! It may be a build up of wax as well . Book an appointment at your doctors to have your ears syringed . It's an easy painless operation and you'll be back to normal , trust me.

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When you do not feel the LOVE what do you do? Walk away , there's plenty more love in the world and it isn't hard to find , believe me.

| 1 person likes this

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What are three things you do to make yourself happy? Drink. Watch Chelsea and..... play chess with my pet hamster.

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Is there someone you would like to address with the following statement? ("I am SO over you!!!) No way fat woman. You'd need to be fired out of a cannon to do that with me lying down.

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Would you like to join the "Big Brother" house? No , i'd like to BOMB it though.

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What is your favorite song by Chicago? Always liked this as a kid even though i couldn't relate to the words. Related to the words as I got older though !!

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What is the cure for loneliness? Don't let yourself get in a rut of thinking you're lonely. Make an attempt at joining in activities in your neighbourhood . Once you get that initial feeling of being a part , your outlook will widen , trust me.

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I've been dating a farmer for the past 3mths and he's busy in the field but he never wants to talk or call. He claims he's busy. A girl he went out with once is now trying to get him in her life. He's a sweet guy and I know he would cheat. What do I do Put a cctv camera on his bullocks.

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Have you ever broken up with someone still in love with them? Why? You'll still have feelings in most cases , it's human nature.

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Have you ever placed a tack on someone's chair? (nb: or done something dastardly like that) Once put laxative into a managers coffee. He went sick the next day and remorse never entered my mind. If you had seen the way he'd treated me you'd understand. We're all human beings in the end.

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What should we name our new Australian Shepherd? Picture in my answer. Boomerang. Then if he gets lost..... Lovely dog.

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Who likes the BEEGEES? Not bad . One of those groups where I wouldn't buy their music but at the same time don't mind listening to them if they come on the radio or a TV Show.

| 1 person likes this

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What is a MUM Mouth Upon Mamarys.

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What are you fighting for? To be first to the toilet , the whole family's got a stomach bug.

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Has anyone else become more addicted to answerbag, than myspace and facebook? I think i may need to be a part of Answerbag Anonymous... I've gone the other way. I'm relatively new to Facebook so use a lot but still pop back here for a little holiday every now and then. Miss the nice people.

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Is Madness the best Ska band ever? They used to be my favourite as a kid but then The Specials took over. Madness first then The Specials.

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What have you done to deserve the new steakhouse burger? I went to the chemist to get some imodium for my elderly neighbour cos she had diarreoah.

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Foods you absolutely cannot resist when placed in front of you? Mature Cheddar Cheese melted on toast.

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I say "cat." What color pops into your mind? Brown poop.

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What kinda questions can i ask figure out whether she's lesbian or not? Can I smell your fingers ?

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Is it possible for a man to be raped? Yes and you'd be surprised how many men are physically abused domestically by their partners. If you think it's one way you couldn't be more wrong.

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How do you greet co-workers or friends in the morning? Morning s***face !!

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What do you value most in life now? My Chelsea season ticket and my Oasis memorabilia.

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What are some songs with the word "star" in the title? These two , You've got the heart of a star and rock and roll star.

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In honor of Liverpoorl's Beatle's Day... What song from the Beatle's represents your life the best at this moment? This one.

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What will you do, when your children have grown up and moved out? Make love in peace.

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At what age did you stop having BIG birthday parties? One.

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I've heard of a tricycle and a unicycle, but what's a menstrualcycle? For one period of the month you can't ride it.

| 1 person likes this

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What website do you visit when you're done on AB? Facebook.

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What was the moment when it clicked that you were not young anymore? Some kids let me on the bus first.

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What is your favvorite wild animal? White tiger.

| 1 person likes this

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Whats the first thing that attracts you to the opposite sex? Big bouncy boosy whackers.

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Wait! ...Listen!....Did you smell that? What was that? My Nan blowing off after some sprouts.

| 1 person likes this

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You've only got 4 minutes to save the world. What do you do? Poop myself.

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What comes to mind when i say "red"? Girlfriends botty after a little spank.

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Are you scared of guns or the bullets that come out of them? The bullets , they hurt.

| 1 person likes this

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Why are coffee bags hung on the coat hooks of airplane bathroom doors? So you don't fall asleep on the toilet.

| 2 people like this

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I have a golf outing to go to next Friday and the people there get high 30s in 9 holes, while I get high 50s. Any tips on how to improve my game? Cheat.

| 1 person likes this

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Worst possible statement! Your arse is getting huge love.

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Why does love hurt so much when u are much younger than the person u are in love wit? You'll learn as you get older. It's a long learning curve but you'll remember this in a few years. God Bless and I hope you get what you want in the end.

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Is there someone you would drop everything for? Someone with a gun pointed my way.

| 1 person likes this

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Youtube uploads never fail when I use them to support answers but why do jpegs have to be uploaded several times before they finally post? This has been a reoccuring problem for ages now. It's probably because the server can't handle all the requests at once.

| 1 person likes this

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What do you think humans will be like 500 years from now if we are still here? Metal with leather Nike trainers.

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What does SPAM stand for? Sexy Pamela Anderson Mamarys

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Why does wood pop when put on a fire? Airholes where knots are in the wood.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the Queen's last name? Does she even have one? Tisential.

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Whats your favorite "sing along" song? I mean one that everyone seems to sing when it comes on Most people will join in with this one....

| 1 person likes this

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Why can't I find someone? When they go and hide , cheat , and look through your fingers.

| 1 person likes this

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If you could choose one song that reflected how you felt about your s/o, which one would it be? This one.

| 1 person likes this

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Why do you get a headache after reading for a long time? What is the biological explanation that occurs within the brain? You may need an eye test.

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What's the best way to amplify your vocabulary? Shout.

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What is the sexist name to have? Ben Dover.

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What was your reaction when you found out how babies were made? That my parents were bloody liars.

| 1 person likes this

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Why do people hunt innocent animals? Is it realy fair? Dont animals have rights too? Of course they do. People who hurt animals are ignorant.

| 3 people like this

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How do you know when you're in love? she licks her lips when I walk in the room.

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Finish this sentence -- My love life is___________? a computer.

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What are some ways to get back at the women that broke your heart? Don't bother mate , it's not worth it. It doesn't get you anywhere , trust me. I know it's hard but move on and turn over another page in your life , there'll be someone else for you.

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Think of a sentence using the word monstrous in it My ex-girlfriends buttocks are monstrous.

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Do you often flush things down the toilet that shouldn't be flushed? Yes , an ex-girlfriend once.

| 1 person likes this

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Why airport authority in US treats every Muslim as suspected terrorist? I think it's more ' potential terrorist'. It's because they have to. It's a sad state of affairs but this is what this mad world has become I'm afraid.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the saddest song you have ever heard? Oasis - Who put the weight of the World on my shoulders.

| 1 person likes this

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Why do we get a song in our head and one bit of it plays over and over and over? It's called the 'catchy' bit.

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Is it really ethical to charge someone $1500 to talk to someone's dead mother, or the same amount to cleanse their home of spirits...? No , don't entertain the bloody idiots.

| 1 person likes this

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I recently found out one of my friends is a ABer too. Do you keep your Answer bagging past time a secret too? why? Sometimes it's best , one of my mates at work said he was building up a different kind of profile to me when he saw my answers !! :-D

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Pretend I'm your ex, Do you want me back? Depends what you done.

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What hurts more than a broken heart? Stubbing your toe.

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What is the best thing that every happened to you? Being born.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the definition of contributing alcohol to minors? Absent mindness.

| 1 person likes this

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Is the person your in love with on AB? Yes , myself.

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Would you ever make an underground shelter for emergency situations? Do you think they will ever be needed? I've got one now for when my brother farts.

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If a man texts you after a date rather than calling is he still interested?he texted me a few days after the date I'd say so. Some people are just shy about talking on the phone. Also if you'd decided you weren't interested it cuts out his embarrassment. He'll know now you're interested if you contact him. I'd like to bet now he's been asking his friends wether he should text or call you.

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What do you think of when you hear '70s music? I think " Let's boogie on down !!! "

| 1 person likes this

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What is your opinion of vampires? They're a pain in the neck.

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Are you American? Nah , English.

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What's important to you about AB: finding answers, asking questions, gaining points, or the community? The community and having a laugh. For me it's a release from the daily grind.

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You know you are an Italian when...? You have a signed Godfather box set.

| 1 person likes this

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What is your favorite Celtic song? Rainy Night in Soho - The Pogues.

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What is your favorite song of the disco era (80's)? The Rah Band - Clouds Across The Moon.

| 1 person likes this

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Is Greek really hard to learn? I found it easy to urn.

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Should couples disclose there past sexual encounters to each other? No , definitely not , you're writing a new book . Throw the old books away.

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What makes you cry? Chelsea losing and my alarm clock going off in the morning.

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Love is..... Not what it's made out to be.

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How did NEW CROSS in South London (SE14) get it's place name? New Cross was originally known as Hatcham (the name persists in the title of the Anglican parishes of St. James, Hatcham along with its school, and All Saints, Hatcham Park). The earliest reference to Hatcham is in the 11th century, in the Domesday Book of 1086 as Hacheham. It was held by the Bishop of Lisieux from the Bishop of Bayeux. Its domesday assets were: 3 hides; 3 ploughs, 6 acres of...

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What are the advantages/disadvantages for having too many friends? I don't think there's any . I've got loads through playing football for various teams in my town and have never had any problems. However if I was to get married ....... :-D

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It is true if you stick a stamp with the queen's head on it upside down you could be fined or even go to prison? Not at all , you can put the stamp anywhere on the envelope you like although people usually use the top right hand corner as it looks neater. Trust me I'm a postman.

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What music is most soothing for you to listen to? Sigur Ros.

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What are you doing with your loved ones today? Giving them a bath and then a good dry out in the sun.

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Why do you smoke weed? why don't you smoke weed? I smoked it once and never again because I acted like a right pratt afterwards. Also since giving up smoking it wouldn't be something I divulged in anyway.

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Where do we find the world’s smallest deer? I've no ideer. Sorry.

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How do I make people on the internet think I am smart? Not worth trying to be something you're not. Just be yourself and people will respect you for that.

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.............. is something you dislike! Rottenham Hotspur.

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Who was the best movie villain ever? The Child Catcher out of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang !!

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How can you tell if a lesbian is single Blow up doll in shopping bag.

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What are you going to play on the jukebox for the AB TGIF happy hour? The Cure - Friday I'm in Love.

| 3 people like this

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If the person you loved were to walk into your house right now and tell you they loved you, what would you do? Get a hard on.

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I am going to be going on a 16 hour car ride, does anybody have any good ideas to make the time go by? Ipod and sleeping pills.

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I am trying to stay sober. The problem is, everyone I know drinks (all of my friends, family etc). I feel really alone and unsupported. my friends tell me to "lighten up" and get drunk with them. How do you stay sober despite the social pressures? Get a hobby that draws you away from the temptations.

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How adventurous are you with food? Once climbed a mountain with some.

| 1 person likes this

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When you spend more time on AB, do you find yourself getting more serious or nuttier? Erm , I don't think I need to answer this one.

| 2 people like this

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Do you ever end up fighting with your friends over dumb things? Yeah , girls !! :-D

| 1 person likes this

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Whats the best Metal band EVER in your opinion? Guns 'n' Roses.

| 1 person likes this

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What's the best "I'm sorry" song? Chicago and Madness !!!

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When drinking what is your drink of choice? mine happens to be a 7 & 7. Stella Artois.

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Answer to:
best song by John Lennon? 1. Imagine. 2. Mind Games.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Has Elvis left the building? No,he's having a crap.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What would you say to your boss if you won the lotto tommorrow? Nothing because I just wouldn't go in !!

| 5 people like this

Answer to:
How many times do you open your refrigerator? Every five minutes.

Answer to:
Who sings the song, "Dancing Queen?" ABBA.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What month would you like to die? Havn't really thought about it !! January probably, so I could spend thousands on my credit card at Christmas and then not worry about it.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Girls: Hairy or smooth chests? I like my girls with smooth chests.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What was the first band you ever saw live? The Superb MADNESS.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How tall was Elvis Presley? Five foot eleven. Six foot with his blue suede shoes on.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
I just discovered the joys of turnips. Anyone else? I find it lazy , I just cut the bottom of the jeans to size and stitch about a quarter of an inch back up.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
I'm going on a bike ride with my s/o tonight. Any suggestions? Stop off in a remote field under the setting sun and ...........

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
If you were a farmer what would you grow? Old quick.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Who is one person you would like to meet? Liam Gallagher.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Can you tell me in one word what it means if you think that you are funny but nobody else does? Disappointing.

| 6 people like this

Answer to:
What is your ideal breakfast? How often do you have it? Full English Breakfast. I have it once a week on a Saturday and then say sorry to my heart.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Would my intrusion into any of your comment threads cause confusion? Not at all. I've seen some people get annoyed with it , but not this bloke.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Is lego for babys or can teens still play with it Grown men love it as well !!!

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Which parent do you resemble most? Homer Simpson.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What's your favorite type of music? Any particular favorite artists, bands, or groups? Rock - Oasis.

Answer to:
Where is the ¢ key? Under the doormat.

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Answer to:
What can you do in 10 sec? Better ask the girlfriend.

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Answer to:
My girlfriend blew me off one night early in the relationship and went and seen some guy who is a total asshole.Well that night she was supposed to call me and said she lost her phone and never did. She later got home at 5 in the morning. Did she cheat? Yep , unless she's a werewolf.

Answer to:
Where do tree's orignally come from, i know new tree's come from other tree's but where did the very 1st tree come from? Adam's acorns.

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Answer to:
What is the funniest song lyric you've ever heard? Say no more.

Answer to:
What would you do if one of your friends started dating your crush? Cry frustratingly.

Answer to:
When you are getting ready for work, do you have the Computer, TV, Radio or nothing on? I get ready for work at 4.30 am so it's in my best interests not to turn anything on !!!! :-D

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do you drink Red Bull and how many cans do you drink a week? Used to have a couple of cans at work a day but gave up because I didn't wanna end up like this bloke.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What is the most beautiful song you ever heard? mine is in the first answer. Absolutely loads come to mind but I love this one. Kate Melua- Closest thing to crazy. She's beautiful as well by the way.

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Answer to:
What English word gives you the most trouble? Women.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Do you have broadband (DSL, ADSL, Cable, etc.) or dial-up? Broadband, don't know how anyone could be on dial up these days. It used to drive me mad !!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What do you do at the beach? (lay and bake, find seashells, skimboard etc) Shrivel my privates.

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Answer to:
WHICH GAS IS HEAVIER THAN AIR & IT IS GREENISH COLOUR? My botty gas after a plate of cabbage.

Answer to:
If you had to die what would you want to die from? Physical Exhaustion whilst in bed with Scarlett Johansson.

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Answer to:
How do I put a video from Youtube into an Answer ,using the upload video. Please don't dazzle me with cryptic jargon expertise.This is why I'm asking for help,because obviously I can't do it at my first few attempts.I need a,b,c instructions. If you are getting videos off YouTube are you making sure you get the whole code ? The code will start and end in 'object'.

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Answer to:
Amy Winehouse - How much do you care? Not at all although I do like her music. She needs to take her finger off the self destruct button.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why can't I upload pictures Just have to keep trying I'm afraid. It's a glitch. It will display in the end.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
As an AB user, do you consider yourself to be just occasionally funny or are you mostly hilarious? Ten percent funny.

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Answer to:
Have you ever been hit on by someone of the same sex? How did you react? I havn't but if they did I'd boot them in the willy.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
As a man, if Michael Jackson were a woman would you date him? As a woman, would you date Michael Jackson as a man? Nah you'd be kissing her and her tongue would fall off.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
How do i email a you tube video to people At the end of the video click on share and enter their e-mail address or cut and paste the url ( found if you click on 'more' in top right corner).

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
If Mondays were gone, which day would you complain about? The one that replaced it.

Answer to:
Where is my TV remote? Under the dog. Click on image.

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Answer to:
My friend is concerned about his son who is 32 years old, is still single and has never been on a date before. Can you empathize his concerns? He may just prefer the single life.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the coolest name you've ever heard? Russell Sprout.

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Answer to:
What level are you on, on answerbag? 66.

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Answer to:
What is a good name for a softball team(it got to be a candy)and it for Jr.s Hershey Orbiters.

Answer to:
What could I stuff into a red pepper? How long should I cook it for? Victoria Beckham. A week.

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Answer to:
Did you watch the Turkey vs Croatia football game last night? Are you still in a state of shock? Bloody fell asleep just before the final whistle for normal time. !!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is condum? A stupid contraceptive.

Answer to:
Where do I get the answer to my question? - In my email? You will be notified when you get answers on your activity page. Click on your user name in top right hand corner of main page. You will also be notified by e-mail if you have chosen this option.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Is it Friday already?! For this week's Friday Dance Party, would you post a song(s) that you would dedicate to your best friend? Dedicated to all my mad mates.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What was the last concert you went to see? Went to see Bosshoss in Brighton last week. So funny.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is your favorite kind of dance? Can't dance to save my life but used to love watching old school eighties breakdance.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why do men lie so often? Could you imagine if they told the truth all the time. Bet you wouldn't ask if your ' bum looked big in this ' then.

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Think of a famous horror film, and add a funny subtitle, or one you think would have been better, or change an already existing one. Like Halloween: The Night Nobody Came Home instead of The Night He Came Home. What can you come up with? Alien - In space no-one can hear you fart.

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Answer to:
What does 5% of 100 equal? 5.

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Answer to:
What impresses you? Good manners and big bouncy boobs.

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Answer to:
I would never in my right mind ___________! Support Tottenham Hotspur or go to a Spice Girls concert.

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Answer to:
I dont get why playing cards or poker or playing pool is called a sport? They all play competitively with a prize at the end.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do you hate any kind of music? RAP and The Bloody SPICE GIRLS !!

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Do you prefer explorer over firefox? or vis versa? Firefox. A lot quicker and I just feel safer on there.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Where would you like to live in the USA? In Scarlett Johansson's bedroom.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
In your opinion, how does one earn respect? Just be nice , it's easy. Wouldn't it be great if everyone took on this advice. :-D

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What do you do to two faced people? Punch them twice.

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What do you want to accomplish tomorrow? A day's work after two months off with a broken collarbone.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Find one good quality in you...what is it? Sense of humour.

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Answer to:
What do you think of Joan Rivers in America ? See video in first answer for a tv appearance in England yesterday. WARNING : SWEARING.

Answer to:
I'm 14 and how do i pick up chicks at the mall or movies? Tell them you're me.

Answer to:
Why does my computer say "can't find server" when i ask a question, and yet it posts it on AB? Sounds like a normal pc glitch.. It'll probably go away soon. More a server problem than a problem with your pc.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Who do you want to kiss? Scarlett Johanssons left buttock.

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Answer to:
What is the best spot (besides the "heart") to touch a woman to win her over? G.

Answer to:
Here is a quick AB poll, who online has the largest bra cup size, who has the smallest? Can i be referee ?

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What is the most meaningful song to you? Was and always will be for me.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Should menthol flavour cigarettes be banned? Yes cos the maufacturers are making a mint.

| 6 people like this

Answer to:
What's up with the livestrong banner at the top of the page? I think it's a health thing and cancer awareness. The site was started by American cyclist Lance Armstrong. Visit the site.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
My boss is sitting next to me and she wants to know if I should be fired for being on AB all day long at work. She is a good friend of mine as well as my boss. Should I tell her to piss off? Yeah go for it , hasn't she got anything better to do ?

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do you feel that you, "Gotta have a fiddle in the band"? Not a priority , but I do love strings and brass in a song.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
If there was no AB, no Internet, and no computer games, how would you waste your time? Eating beans then lighting my botty burps whilst drinking lager with my pet hamster.

Answer to:
Two weeks ago i met a girl. i text her last week to see if she wanted to meet up and she said yes but when i try to arrange a time shes always doing something. so is she shy, not interested, busy etc. also can i text her without sounding clingy Stop all the texting. If she's interested she'll get in contact , trust me. If she doesn't then you've got your answer and best to move on.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Are you trying to recapture something that you've lost? It could be anything. A flat belly.

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Answer to:
My ex drives past my house everyday Drawing pins in the road.

Answer to:
Did anyone else tear up with happiness when they saw that lesbian couple of over 50 years FINALLY get married? I thought it was so sweet Thought they would've had it licked ages ago.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
Out of 100 people how many people would you guess would be good looking, average and just downright ugly? 20,40,30.

Answer to:
How do you e mail a youtube video to someone? I've been trying but I don't think I'm doing the embed thing right If you are trying to copy and paste the embed code make sure you get the whole address. Left click on the code and run it along to the end and stop the cursor and the code should keep on coming. The code will end in the word 'object' like it starts with. Just practice and you'll see how it works. Or as everyone else has been saying use the share option at the end of the video.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Will you teach me a word in a language besides English? : ) Merde is s*** in French.

Answer to:
Where would you like to go on vacation in 2008? Dubai.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Do you have a family fun night? What sort of activities do you do? Naked twister covered in sun dried tomatoes.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Best male/female duet ever? And the corniest? ; ) Worst first , and then two of the best ( even though I can't stand Mariah Carey !!)

| 5 people like this

Answer to:
What act or music makes you feel most patriotic? This makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. The Last Night of the Proms - Land of Hope and Glory.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
My state took away all Tomatoes we had because of contamination. I live in Kansas. Where you live do you still have tomatoes? Got loads in England. I'll send you some.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Where were you exactly a year ago? In this same seat probably.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
My Dad's in Moscow just now, Have you ever been?? What did you think of it? I went last month for a day to watch Chelsea in the Champions League Final. I found it to be a really interesting place and the people we met were great to us.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why is england not in euro 2008? Because they were crap. Full of overpaid posers.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do you have a nickname for your spouse/significant other? If so, what is it? Droopy Boobs.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
What do you do when you see a tiger? Ask him if he's coming down the pub for a beer.

Answer to:
If Obama was about to step in front of a bus ? what question would you like to ask him before he did? Can you wait until I turn around ?

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
You've just seen your dream date. What do you do next? Get rejected.

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Answer to:
I had someone important to me pass away recently. To play at there wake I'd like to play a rock/metal song thats saying a final goodbye to a lover, any ideas? One of my favourites of all time and very poignant. Guns 'n' Roses - November Rain.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What music are you listening to RIGHT NOW? Coldplay - Violet Hill.

Answer to:
What is your opinion of golf? Love playing it ( periodically) but can only watch the big tournaments on telly.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the most popular sport in Cuba? Cuba Diving.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
My picnic basket is empty, what would you fill it with? Lager.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Which celebrity do you think is a media whore? Victoria Beckham. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH !!!

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What should I do if I have a crush on a nun? Simply lift yourself off her.

Answer to:
What's your favorite part of the body to look at? Bouncy Boosy Whackers.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
What does it take to be your lover? A love of lager. A love of Chelsea. Big boobs.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Who replaced Greg Chappell as Australian cricket captain in 1977? Graham Yallop ?

Answer to:
When is the end of time? When the bell rings in the pub.

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Would you date a person who recently became seperated? As long as it wasn't in a car crash.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Can telling a child that they weren't planned make them feel unwanted? I don't think I 'd be too happy. I was indoors once and I heard a mum shout to her kid " You weren't wanted anyway ! " and it made me feel sick to the stomach. I nearly ran out and gave her a piece of my mind.

Answer to:
What kind of people do you not like to work with? One's who continuously do botty burps and don't like Chelsea.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
I love this girl , but she doesnt love me , what do i do Find yourself someone else. It's no use beating yourself up over someone you can't have. You'll only fall out with that person properly. It's hard but it's the way of the World I'm afraid.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What did you say or do after your first kiss (not the one from your mom)? Can I have my chewing gum back please ?

Answer to:
What number do you get if you divide your current Answerbag rank by your age? About 1.75.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
I'm a woman who doesn't make a lot of money. Do i still have a chance of finding a good guy who'll love me for me, despite my lack of wealth? Of course , in my book it's the person , not what they do , that matters.

Answer to:
How can we prevent catching salmonella? Two good ways are to make sure all food is properly cooked and all food preparing surfaces are spotless. I had salmonella once and I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What is the most insulting word or phrase someone has said to you? Do you support Tottenham Hotspur ?

Answer to:
Has anyone heard of Fleet Foxes ? What do you think of them ( song in first answer )? Here it is.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What would you say to a 27 spoiled boy who has no job but supported by his parents? I wouldn't give him the time of the day.

Answer to:
I have that constant pain in my neck, what can it be? Could be a trapped nerve.

Answer to:
What kind of people do you often find yourself attracted to? People with big boobs who laugh at my jokes and drink cheap drinks.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Yay, its the first annual AB car show, what are you pulling up in, fantasies welcome, please? Mines off the road so I'll have to bring it in my mobile home.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What is your favorite song whose title is also a question? (videos appreciated) What can I do ? - The Corrs.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do you ever socialize at a party (or wherever), and then get home and analyze and re-analyze everything that was said? With all the alcohol inside me there's no way I'd remember.

Answer to:
What should I do if there is an ocean between us? Build a bridge of love.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What are you on? A swivelling chair.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Guys: Would you date this girl ? Video in first answer. What do you reckon? A lot of you have probably seen this before.

Answer to:
When trying to attract the attention of the somebody you like; is it still cool to shrug your left shoulder, bite your bottom lip, pout a little and jiggle your hips? Yeah , I just stick my tongue out and cross my eyes.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
I say "spring", you think of ___________. Feeding baby birds ( fledgings ).

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
From 1-10, how often is 1 the best in 1-10 ratings? Music Charts.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Have you ever stolen someone lover before? No and never would. Always look on the perspective of 'what if it was me '?

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What are the things you hate the most about family gatherings? Pure and simple EVERYTHING !!

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Can you contradict yourself in one sentence? Examples please :) I'm the best looking bloke around , look just like Quasimodo.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Who around here likes Country Music? I love it , even novelty stuff.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What are your favorite bands/music artists of the 80's? The Smiths , Madness and the Specials.

Answer to:
What television shows did you watch when you were little? The Banana Splits.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What's the biggest news story that happened today/week in your town? The local recycling plant caught fire. Exciting eh ?

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Why does it seem that every Hollywood Star is always sucking on a lollipop these days..is this a new fad? Don't take any notice , they're all suckers anyway.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What has answerbag taught you about yourself? I'm not very funny :-(

Answer to:
Why does any white wine i drink all ways taste like vinegar to me? You need to buy a better quality wine, but that'll cost.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Ever seen a man with a big butt - do you think that is funny? Not really , this is me on AB.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the best Nirvana song? If you say Teen Spirit I'll come to your house and kill you. Know it's a cover but I love this.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Do you wish men could give birth to babies? No thanks , may have to miss some Chelsea games.

Answer to:
If you were dieing tomorrow what things would you like to do before you leave this world? Go to bed with Scarlett Johansson ALL DAY !!

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
How many times have you gone to see one music group? Like I saw The Grateful Dead 18 times before Jerry died. How many times have you seen your favorite group? I've seen Oasis nine times.

Answer to:
Can everything in life draw paralells with the Simpsons? As far as I'm concerned YEP !!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
You have free time. What do you do and why? (Please state which country you're in) Go to a football game or down the pub. ( England )

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Have you ever been denied a Friend Request on AB? None. It would take a lot for me to do so as well.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Will you dance with me? You pick the song! Off we go then....

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
WHICH WALKS FASTER A SNAIL OR A TURTLE? Snails don't walk !!!

Answer to:
I am naturally Blonde,5ft 7,blue eyed, slim & great sense of humour (with brains) so why I am single? Want my number ?

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What is your favorite game of all time? Naked Twister with baby oil and tiddlywinks.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
What name brand printer do you have? Lexmark x1180.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What do you usually do when you're heart broken? Feel sorry for myself.

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What's your favourite all-time band? Oasis.

Answer to:
When I say Motown what pops into your head first? The Four tops and The Temptations.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Whats your favorite song about pets? The lovecats - The Cure

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the music group "Simply Red" best recognized song? Holding Back The Years.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Any funny youtube videos that i should know about? This made me laugh.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Who or what makes your day? Chelsea winning and seeing people laugh or smile.

Answer to:
What Would Jesus Do with $3 Trillion? Stop turning water to wine.

Answer to:
What would be the weirdest title for a "For Dummies" book? Indiscreet botty burps

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What best piano song have you ever heard of? Pure class - Bruce Hornsby.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Could someone suggest an upbeat country song? Preferably one sung by a man, for my purposes. Went to see this lot the other night , brilliant , what a laugh.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Which song brings a tear to your eye when you hear it??Mine is Fix You byColdplay A song from a master just before his death,

Answer to:
So, kiss me? Out in the moonlit twilight? There you go.

Answer to:
What are some "brain foods" I should eat before exams? (With reasons) Alphabet spaghetti. Help you with your spelling.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Is your pet overweight? We throw him fish now cos he looks like a seal.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Which song do you play when you are angry at the world or yourself.....like being dumped, or seeing Bush on television, or having sex, or justifying slacking etc? Because I'm not the only one.

Answer to:
What will be a great last song to hear on the radio tonight? The Specials.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Whats your opion of ant and dec? Twats.

Answer to:
Do you recognize the flag on my avatar? Kosovo.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Do you think the internet has hurt us or helped us? Both. I just visit sites that don't and can't harm me.

Answer to:
What is the person you love doing right now? Going out with someone else.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What do you always shop for? BEER !!

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What song do you think best describes AB? Well most of it anyway :-) :-) :-)

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Can you listen to music and work at the same time? I hate working without it !! I'm a postman and we have the radio on at work and then I have my Ipod on when I go out on my delivery.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Who's your favorite singer/ band from the seventies? T Rex.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Hillary suspended her campaign for the Presidency, what does it actually mean? It's finished basically.

Answer to:
How many people on here are British? Me. Southern England.

Answer to:
What would i need to do to be emo? Stick on a load of blue feathers and stick on a yellow beak. Easy !

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What's the difference between Reggae and Ska? Not much , but ska has a more up tempo beat.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What do you think other than the beat of the heart makes humans live? Food and drink.

Answer to:
Are u the most beautiful one around? Yeah , everyone else is out.

Answer to:
In your opinion, what's the best song ever written? Imagine - John Lennon.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Brits: What aspect of nature in the US & Canada would you find most difficult or unsettling to deal with if you had to move here: blizzards, tornadoes, earthquakes, skunks, coyotes...? Blimey, I don't think i'd be comfortable with any of them to be honest with you !! Seriously though it's when it's really hot that would do me in as I suffer with asthma.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Band/Artist you'd rather slit your wrists to than hear a single note of? The Spice Girls or Victoria Beckham on her own. ARRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH !!!!!!!!

| 5 people like this

Answer to:
There are a lot of bad drivers out there, what do you think the worst habits are? Crashing.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Where can I find a disabled philippino girl Ebay.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Will someone cheer me up?:-( I like this , used it in a few answers.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How long have you been using a cell phone? Only six months and all I've done is prove to myself what I knew in the first place. I don't need one !!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Ok, I'm a little down...can you say something...could be funny..could be youtube...or whatever? Not funny but heart warming.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do you have a song that has "Saturday" or "Saturday Night" in it? Whigfield- Saturday Night. Even though I hate it !!!!

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What's the best way to "please" a woman?...if you get my drift. A big box of chocolates.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What's the name of the song that goes" na -na-nanaanana---heyheyhey---goodbye......? Kiss Him Goodbye - Bananarama cover version below. That idiot Crazy Frog also covered it. Original by Steam.

Answer to:
Guys: If a girl thinks you're adorable, do you feel like a pet? Nah , it makes me go red and feel wanted.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
I like this girl and she's a prostitute, will it be a big mistake to ask her for a date? If you want go for it. She may stop her 'job'.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Can you please tell me an answer that you have used to answer more than one question on AB? Scarlett Johansson.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
If you just became a billionaire, what is the first thing you would do? (your answer doesn't have to include spending money.) Crack open a beer and laugh manically.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Which kind of music do you like? I've got a very eclectic taste. Anything from Mozart to Oasis. My Ipod shows that my music covers twenty different genres !! I find it quite disturbing that people just pigeon hole their music into one kind and that's it.

Answer to:
If you could transform into any animal when ever you want what would it be and why A skunk , to ward off any idiots I don't like.

Answer to:
It's the weekend and time to do what's been waiting all week for you. Which chore do you dread the most? Ironing.

| 1 person likes this