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I have been married 8 years to a man who lies about drinking. He will buy a 24oz. beer and hide the receipt. I recently found numerous cans hidden in my garage. We have had awful fights which lead him to going back out and buying one or more 6 packs. We have 2 children and money is tight, yet he has enough to drink daily. Recently, he promised me he would stop drinking, unless I specifically asked him to bring home something for both of us. That lasted until our anniversary. I came home to champagne in the fridge and him telling me he was only on his 3rd beer. He went to the store to get dog food and came back with a 24 oz. beer. The next day I looked at the flower receipt from the grocery store. It showed he bought 2 of the 24oz. beers at 2:00. The same lies hold true for cigarettes and porn as well. I hate the lies and with just a few days into our 8th anniversary, he is sleeping upstairs. What should I do?
by Tom Slick on June 17th, 2011
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Comments
He has a problem. That is the first thing to understand. You need to realize this. No one wants to lie and break promises to his wife. He has a problem. The best thing you can do is be sympathetic towards him. Help him get help for his problem.
Maybe his is stressing about the money situation and alcohol is his means to cope with it. His drinking could be a symptom of another problem he is faced with. How is his work going? Is his boss an a*****e? Does he have deadlines he must meet?
The best thing you can do is calmly talk to him openly and honestly without blaming him. Understand his side of the story THEN decide what needs to happen and what you can do to help him and help your relationship.
by One mans opinion on June 17th, 2011
Unfortunately, he was abused as a child. I think this is the main reason he lies. However, I have tried to get him to go to counseling and he won't go. He has a short temper and snaps quickly. He is NOT abusive physically to anyone in our house. But, he will yell, cuss and make our oldest daughter "scared.". He will be fine one second and then in the next breath he is yelling at our daughter because she is spinning and he had asked her to stop. We parent very differently and the lies make it worse.
by Just asking on June 17th, 2011