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by Metaphiz on December 14th, 2006

Metaphiz

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A friend of mine was raped recently while at work. She just found out that she is pregnant, and has every reason to believe that the child is the product of that rape. Is it right for her to abort the child?

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  • by lizvelrene on April 4th, 2007

    lizvelrene

    If you're her friend, you will support her either way.

    She has to decide if she can love a child unreservedly who was conceived in such an awful way. She will also have to face being FOREVER tied to her rapist by giving birth to his child, whether she keeps it or gives it up for adoption. She has to honestly think about if she can happily endure 18 years with a constant reminder of her trauma under her roof. Would she resent such a child on some level, which a child would undoubtedly pick up on eventually?

    Also, consider whether she is financially and emotionally capable of raising a child. Whether she is physically up to giving birth. Whether her job will penalize her for the pregnancy and maternity leave. Whether she has family support to help her as a single parent. Whether she will be concurrently sitting through a trial for her rapist, which is incredibly stressful and can be horribly demeaning to the victim who is likely to be attacked and discredited throughout. There's always the chance he will be walking free in the world as the father of her baby, with every potential to retaliate or interfere in the child's life.

    Personally I would abort the pregnancy. These are terrible circumstances to bring a baby into. But perhaps she will feel differently, and want to have it. In either case she will need a lot of support from you and the other people around her. I hope you can come to peace with her decision either way and honestly respect her actions as the best choice for her life.

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