How can I stop being jealous of my husband's ex-wife? They talk on the phone and they want to do things together with their children (birthday parties, Christmas, etc.). I don't feel comfortable with this. Am I wrong?

Comments

• That answer was harsh. Put youself in her situation. Would you want to spend Christmas with you husband's ex lover? SHE is married to him. He needs to have the family's special times be with his new family. Ex wife can see the kids separatly. Why does the second wife not get to have a real family? Shouldn't matter who's kids are who's...the new family unit is the new family.

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  by Designeedawn on June 17th, 2008

• Wow!!! I agree with Designeedawn! That is a harsh answer!! This has nothing to do with 'co-parenting'. It has everything to do with appropriate boundaries. If you are wanting to hang out together with the kids...don't get a divorce. Parental alienation has nothing to do with the parents being with the kids at the same time! Amicable can be done without being in the same place at the same time.

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  by 717171 on June 17th, 2008

• Sometimes the truth is harsh. DEAL WITH IT.

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  by bowlermommy07 on June 19th, 2008

• You're lucky you didn't say that shit to my face. Or YOU would have to DEAL WITH IT.

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  by Designeedawn on June 20th, 2008

• Nothing says you have to be with your husband and his ex wife. You can be somewhere else.

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  by bowlermommy07 on June 20th, 2008

• you sound like an ex-wife...... but what if he has a family with the new wife then of course their feelings have to be considered too even perhaps above yours as they are the legitimate family by marriage since yours ended.
  
  I believe their should be respect for the new wife and by leaving her out is not respecting her or teaching the kids to respect her which they'll have to if she is to become the mother of their future half-siblings.

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  by salsa1984 on November 7th, 2009

• Wow, that was way harsh. She is obviously an ex wife. I am an ex wife as well, but I NEVER speak to him. I cannot stand the man and we have a 5 year old son. I know EXACTLY how she feels being the new one myself. I think that if they are going to have "family" time with their kids, that the new wife and her kids, if applicable, attend as well. There is nothing that says that EVERYONE cannot be included. It also shows the ex wife and their kids that you and your husband are in the picture TOGETHER and there is no separation of families. I struggle with this and understand the frustration. Hang in there. I am trying as well. I have actually tried to just talk to the ex and try and keep things civil between me and her even though she is the one who started things with me and I didn't give in and fuel the fire so to speak. Not saying that I don't vent to my fiancee, but that is behind closed doors and I NEVER say anything negative about her in front of his kids. He does, but that is HIS choice to do so, don't stoop down and be like her. Let her hang herself with their kids. God Bless and Good luck. I hope everything works out for both of us. Just remember why you fell in love with him and that you are his everything NOW. She was the PAST...you are not. I struggle with this EVERYDAY.

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  by lovingmyman on February 9th, 2011