Ask a Question
or
Create a Poll
  1. Home /
  2. Questions /
  3. Relationship Advice
  4. / Family Relationships
  5. / Stepfamilies

by alliyahglee on July 3rd, 2007

alliyahglee

Question

Help answer this question below.

Me and my husband confront almost everyday.it's because of his daughter.i love my husband but i can't love/accept her daughter.maybe i am too selfish or what, but i can't control myself being jealous at her especially if he give her much attention than I.

  • Like
  • Report
Share:
Other

Answers. Showing one answer.

  • by - retroglide - on July 3rd, 2007

    - retroglide -

    You need to think of this in a different light. If your husband was not attentive to his daughter, that would indicate that he is not a loving and responsible man. That quality alone is very admirable.

    Was there ever a time when you saw him interacting with his daughter and found it touching or appealing? Did it have any bearing on your attraction to him?

    The relationship between a father and daughter and a wife and a husband are completely different. You each have a place in his life.

    If you are having jealousy issues then you may suffer from a lack of self esteem.

    This is something you need to address ASAP. You may need counseling. I am not talking about family counseling, but individual counseling.

    Ultimately your relationship with him will fail unless you take action to understand why you are having these feelings. It will fester like a bad pimple.

    This isn't a competition for affection.

    I, as a parent, would choose my child over any mate if I had to choose. And it is my belief that most parents would. You need to keep this in mind.

    Comments

    • I agree the bond between child and parent is linked in blood

      armygirl

      by armygirl on October 1st, 2008

    • On the other side...I have a husband who refuses to confront his daughter over anything including issues that may be of danger to her...such as driving her car drunk repeatedly(new car he had bought her). She only had one chore every two weeks to do but she refused to do that and of course he could not stand behind it. No such thing as any repercussions. Talk about living with a monster. And of course, I ended up the evil one and I made it a point to stay out of it until I decided, Gee, she is going to have to do ONE thing that is expected of her or I am outta here. I never did have any jealous feelings toward her but I do like when there are some boundaries in a household although I am not strict. He said he felt he was never there for her when she was little because he overslept in the morning due his night job. Wow! And she is quick to slam him in the face with it every time. We almost broke up over this mess. The resentment that I felt for him and her was sky high - not a good feeling. I did know he was the one with the problem and that it was not entirely her fault. She no longer lives with us and our relationship (his daughter) is still stressed. Though, I must say, when you can't discipline or set some boundaries with your own kid, things will be tough on them out in the world. Her past two jobs she has lost because she does not like being told what to do and she struggles to get along with people...of course, she might be dealing with other problems as well. Sorry guys, I know this has nothing to do with the question from above.
      Stableboy, It is admirable that you are even looking for ways to deal with these devastating emotions. I know some persons who would not admit or not realize that they have any emotional issues at all that need to be dealt with. You will be the one who gets help. I think as many have already suggested, therapy would be a great start. It is difficult to make changes alone when they are so deep rooted such as insecurity. Good luck!

      kimico1955

      by kimico1955 on November 26th, 2010

    • Like
    • Report

    2 comments | Post one | Permalink

Want to attach an image to your answer? Click here.

Did this answer your question? If not, then ask a new question or create a poll.

More Questions. Additional questions in this category.

You're reading Me and my husband confront almost everyday.it's because of his daughter.i love my husband but i can't love/accept her daughter.maybe i am too selfish or what, but i can't control myself being jealous at her especially if he give her much attention than I.

Follow us on Facebook!

Related Ads

Related Questions

Professionally Researched

Answerbag

a Demand Media company